You Can't Rush These Things.....

Some people are just good at finding their niche in life, but some people struggle. Even though it's a shame, some people even give up on trying to find their selves all together. I had this problem, untill recently.

Ever since I was about 12, I felt the pressure of wanting and trying to "fit in". I never could keep up with the rest of my friends socially, mostly because I was a lot younger than them. I felt icolated from everyone around me, especially at school. All of my friends would come to school and talk about stuff like dating and all the clubs they were in. I always felt so different, because I was always just at home playing with dolls, or spending time with my little sister. I felt years behind them in maturity. My so-called "best friend" even used to tell me on a daily basis "grow UP!" or "you are such a big baby!" You can imagine this made me feel even worse. All I wanted to do was be like them, and do what they did. My parents weren't much help either. They would always ask me what I wanted to do for the rest of my life, or when I was going to get a job. Even my little sister had already out-grown everything I hadn't, and even got her first kiss before me. All of this coming at me at age 12 was scary. All of the pressure forcing me to grow up made me fear that there was something wrong with me, and that I should already be moving out of my parents house or something.

It wasn't untill I was 14 that I really found who I wanted to be. I decided to just do what I felt like doing, and blocking-out all of the negative things around me. I came to the conclusion that I would just take my sweet time growing up, and enjoying it as long as I could. I then realized something very important. It was that everyone matures differently, and for some it takes longer. I'm not talking about going through puberty, but about really finding what you were meant for. Finding yourself. I also learned that being young and spirited doesn't have to fleet away with maturing. I am still as happy-go-lucky and spaztic as I was when I was 12, and I know that's not because there is something wrong with me, but because that is who I am. And I still have a lot of growing up to do. I now realize that waiting was worth it, rather than trying to be someone other than myself, and trying to rush into maturity.

It may seem like a drag, but sometimes you have to wait a bit to mature and find out who you are. You can't rush the process, because if you do, you could end up just following someone else's example, and becoming something you don't want to be. Just be who you want, and everything else will come in time. Never think that you have to be like anybody else. BE YOURSELF!!!!!