First Quarter of Sophomore Year

The second year of high school has been the easiest thus far. Last year as a Freshmen, I did well. I never had a report card that got me on the honor roll, or the list in the local newspaper of all the kids with As and Bs, but that's my goal for this year. I know I can do better, I know there's room for improvement, there always is.

I'm not a perfect human being, no one is. I have my favorite subject and my least favorite subject. Favorite subject is History. Least Favorite, Math. I try extra hard to get good grades. I do my homework, study for all the tests and quizzes and listen in class.

I don't notice any major problems. Last year, I was diagnosed with anxiety, which I now have an educational plan for. I get wicked anxious around test time and will sometimes need extra time to complete it, so basically, that's what the plan says, give me more time if need-be. It worked out great last year! I did exceptionally well on my finals and am stoked to have that plan, so at least it brings comfort to me if I need more time, so I won't get freaked out. However, the sad part about this is that my parents are pissed that I'm diagnosed with test taking and anxiety in general. They feel like I use it too much to my advantage. I'm telling you, I don't.

Funny thing is, they were all for the plan to be put in place, but now they just want it to be taken away. I don't understand why they want to do that. It's not holding me down or anything. Even when it was put in place, they told us it wouldn't hold me down, even in college! So, they have this problem with it.

Anxiety is different for everyone and I think my parents just don't comprehend that my anxiety is affecting my grades to some point. I get wicked anxious with tests, but I'm trying new things every time I take one. Such as deep breathing and "grounding" which is basically when you take a deep breath at the beginning of the test and then start it with both feet on the floor, hands on the desk flat, no head in hands, correct posture and continuous breathing throughout the test. Just take it slow kinda thing.
Grounding does work for me. It helps keep me calmer than before. Before the plan was put in place, I'd freak out, look at the clock a lot, rush through the questions and bomb them. But, now, I focus easier after learning about "grounding" through my doctor.

My study skills are great too. I always write down when I have a test or a quiz in each class and give myself enough time ahead of time to study for that test or quiz. I'm finding that if I give myself two or three days before the quiz to study, so if I study for the quiz for like 30 minutes or so each day, that works best. Plus, sometimes, I think it helps if I review the material before I go to bed, that way it's the last thing on my mind.

With tests, depending on when the teacher informs me, I usually study way ahead of time. Get out my notes and quizzes and other review materials, to study with. I'll even make up flashcards to help. Again, I will study each day before the test for however long it takes me to review the material for the test. So, in terms of test taking and study skills, I think I have a routine here.

The one thing I notice that I don't do enough of is going in for extra help. All of my teachers offer this and I know my weekly schedule gets a little hectic sometimes, but still, that's no excuse. This is where I know I can improve. I do have questions or uncertainties that can be answered if I just go in for this help.

I can easily make a switch in my schedule, tell someone that I need to be with my teacher instead of with the club for that day because I need extra help. So, I really shouldn't feel like I can't because I'm afraid I might miss something, again anxiety has some control here. But, still, that's no excuse.

For me, my priorities should be like this:
1. Family
2. School
3. Friends
4. Hobbies
5. Free Time

Whereas, it probably is like this today...
1. Family
2. Hobbies
3. School
4. Friends
5. Free Time

So, I need to be more like the first one, instead of the second.

I also think that I can limit my time on here as well, because believe it or not, my computer is probably my number one distraction!
I use it for school, GSB, Mibba, Facebook, emailing, researching, fun time etc. So, I do need to limit myself on the computer too. Just, for starters, getting my homework done before I come on here and seeing where that takes me in the grade department.

So, I have two things I can work on, going in for extra help and limiting my time spent on my computer. I definitely will try my hardest to do both! As tempting as it is to goof off, I can't. I really can't. School's way too important right now. I'm in my sophomore year! I need to start thinking about what I want to do with the rest of my life! Where I want to go for college! What I want to do careerwise! That in itself is a huge responsiblity! One that I can't screw up on or else my entire life could be screwed up with one stupid mistake! And I'm not going to let that happen! I can't. And I won't!

Thanks for listening to the ranting! I needed to flesh it out!