Suicide and self harm!

attempted it a number of times

Okay, this is really hard.

I cut. Just recently started. I have a need for it. It's like, I feel numb. Like, no one cares. And then theres the whole, where's my pain coming from? I don't know half the time. It's in my head mixed up and I can't identify it. I have to amit, it's only a saftey pin, but it gets a result. It all happened by accident too. I dug into my purse and hit a saftey pin. Thought nothign of it at first. Later, when there was a mark, I looked at it, and I felt releif. I lvoe to know WHY. That's such a powerful word. WHY. *shiver* But now, I know why I'm hurting...why it's causing pain.....it's weird.

I have thought about suicide before, but...no. I would never do it. The thought of leaving this earth eventually freaks the hell otu of me. Why leave early? Yeah, family sucks. Most of my freind's suck. My only true freinds are my pen pal (if that's what you wanna call her) from PA, and some people on this board. Beleive it or not, you all keep me goin. Hard to explain, but if you lay it all out, that's what it comes out too.


I used to think it was all pointless "why would you hurt yourself to get releif?!?" But you never understand unless you've gone through it...

I understand even though I've never experienced it myself because sometimes...well, rarely...I have these breakdowns and I feel like smoking fags, taking drugs, running away from home and cutting. But in the end I never do because I don't know how.

And I understand about the numb bit too because I feel it. It's like....I can't ever feel...I'm totally expressionless and at the same time it's like...I have this weight on my back and I can't smile. I'm like this alot that I don't even remember why I feel like that. It's weird and I'm trying hard to think of all the positive things. Because whenever I hear about how people have worse lives than me, I suddenly feel like a pathetic loser and a whiny bitch.

But the next day, I feel pretty down again

I have Crohn's disease, so there were times when I wanted to die, but i knew suicide was never worth it......so i didn't do it and you shouldn't either.

What's Crohns? I've heard of it but I'm not sure as to what it actually is?

IBD

I don't get it. Everyone thinks about suicide. And they never do it. They think it's cool. And it's not. It's retarded. So yeah. That's my opinion. The End.

!Akli!:

I don't get it.

Exactly

Nine_Inch_Nails:

What's Crohns? I've heard of it but I'm not sure as to what it actually is?

Crohn's disease is a condition which causes inflammation in the small intestine. Crohn's disease usually occurs in the lower part of the small intestine, called the ileum, but it can affect any part of the digestive tract from the mouth down.

Crohn's disease is an inflammatory bowel disease (IBD), the general name for diseases that cause inflammation in the intestines. Crohn's disease can be difficult to diagnose because its symptoms are similar to other intestinal disorders such as irritable bowel syndrome and to another type of IBD called ulcerative colitis.

KJ*Kisack*and*BJ*Arm:

I have Crohn's disease, so there were times when I wanted to die, but i knew suicide was never worth it......so i didn't do it and you shouldn't either.

You have Chron's Disease too?. Wow. Having suffered from it since the age of four I can appreciate how difficult it must be for you. I am lucky in the sense that I have had the disease since I was very young and have almost grown up with the disease. It really isn't worth being suicidal over, though.

Bloodraine:

Nine_Inch_Nails:

What's Crohns? I've heard of it but I'm not sure as to what it actually is?

Crohn's disease is a condition which causes inflammation in the small intestine. Crohn's disease usually occurs in the lower part of the small intestine, called the ileum, but it can affect any part of the digestive tract from the mouth down.

Crohn's disease is an inflammatory bowel disease (IBD), the general name for diseases that cause inflammation in the intestines. Crohn's disease can be difficult to diagnose because its symptoms are similar to other intestinal disorders such as irritable bowel syndrome and to another type of IBD called ulcerative colitis.

KJ*Kisack*and*BJ*Arm:

I have Crohn's disease, so there were times when I wanted to die, but i knew suicide was never worth it......so i didn't do it and you shouldn't either.

You have Chron's Disease too?. Wow. Having suffered from it since the age of four I can appreciate how difficult it must be for you. I am lucky in the sense that I have had the disease since I was very young and have almost grown up with the disease. It really isn't worth being suicidal over, though.

My Dad has Chrons.
Not that that has much to do with anything

alcohol.

i drink it for no reason.


...maybe there's something wrong with that?

well I tried to break the shower with my arm but thats not really harmful I guess.....

when i got bulliied really really badly the thought crossed my mind for about a second but then i thought NO! i love myself... its their fault! its their problem! why should i blame myself... so i dont think anybodys worth hurting/killing urself for!

*muffin_girl*:

when i got bulliied really really badly the thought crossed my mind for about a second but then i thought NO! i love myself... its their fault! its their problem! why should i blame myself... so i dont think anybodys worth hurting/killing urself for!

Good for you! I'm proud of you..even though I don't actually know you. xD

*muffin_girl*:

when i got bulliied really really badly the thought crossed my mind for about a second but then i thought NO! i love myself... its their fault! its their problem! why should i blame myself... so i dont think anybodys worth hurting/killing urself for!

Wooo. Go you

plz don't commit suicide

KJ*Kisack*and*BJ*Arm:

plz don't commit suicide

....I won't.

I think everyone has thought about it, just not everyone has thought about it to the same extent.

When im at a very sad time i think about it,but then i realize i just want to take the easy way out.then again,everybody thinks about it when life couldnt get worse,cuz nobody wants to go thru anything hard or sad and the only way to end it NOW,and not deal with the fact that your life sucks is suicide.the thing is,as much as i'd love to end all the pain,emptiness,sadness,etc., i want to do and try so many stuff that suicide wouldnt let me do.
about self harm,i've never done it,but i think ppl does it for one of the next reasons:a.to replace emotional pain with physical,or
b.for atention,wich i think is also emotional pain cuz that person feels that he/she needs an ugly scar to attract people.
And to all the people who are thinking of commiting suicide,pleese dont do it,cuz the easy way out wont let you go to a green day concert.

~Nice_Girl~:

And to all the people who are thinking of commiting suicide,pleese dont do it,cuz the easy way out wont let you go to a green day concert.

That just suddenly made me think...but then...I wont be able to see a Green Day show when I'm alive anyway. And right now...I think I'm going insane...but don't worry...I'm not gonna hurt myself or anything. I just wish everything would disappear though...and everyone would just rot in hell for ONCE. Hahaha. Well, not everyone...but all the bastards in my life. Just rot, rot, rot.