It's okay to get pregnant before marriage as long as you are with that person in a commited relationship. If it's like one night stand than no wayy....
I think it's okay. if not i wouldn't be sitting here writing this. But as long as a person(s) are able to take care of the child then i dont see that it would be anything wrong with it
folkin' around. King For A Couple Of Days Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 3243
December 15th, 2005 at 08:33pm
I don't thinlk it's the best thing...especially when it's not planned.
My mom got pregnant with me before she was married.
It Rushed her and my father into marriage.
At the Time she could barely affored living by herself
so you can imangine how great we were living with 0 $.
It's also hard for the kid.
Sometimes when they have arguments they blame it
on me that I had to be born and crap like that.
It just rushes everything...so no I don't think you sjould
get pregnant before marriage.
I'm all for getting pregnate before you get married, but mostly because I don't quite understand marrage. I don't see how your relationship is anything different because the government said "Ok, your relationship is for real" or w/e, it doesn't change the way you feel about the person. So for that reason alone I don't see the difference in having a child when you're in a long-term relationship and having a child when you're married.
As for the argument that a child who's parents are married may have a more stable environment, I don't agree with that at all. Marrage isn't any more binding than any other relationship, the only difference with marrage is that it costs you an assload to break up.
It depends on who you are, really. Some people are disgusted at the idea of sex before marrage, spo i guess they should be maried when thay have kids. I don't think its wrong to have children before being married. If you think about it, having a baby is probably the most nattural thing on the planet. Personally I think marrage is against human nature (not that i'm against it, or im ruling it out for myself)
(BTW, i realise i have spelt 'marrage'wrong all the way through this)
cabot gal GSBitch Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 76863
December 19th, 2005 at 11:28am
i wouldnt say aim for it but if it happens then it happens. and if you dont wanna get married then cool, some people believe it's just a piece of paper.
I think thats wrong, personally. Why should someone have sex before marriage and end up pregnant if you can't spend the rest of your life with them?
My religious beliefs also don't follow that. I hope not to have sex before I get married.
hahahaha you only think it's wrong because you've had it shoved down your throat that it's wrong, obviously. because the only idea that anything like that might even BEGIN to be wrong all came about with religion.
I have some advice for you... It's better to have people to think you are ignorant than to make comments like that and prove you are ignorant
Franny. Falling In Love With The Board Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 5246
December 19th, 2005 at 03:26pm
before marriage or after doesn't make a difference, a baby is still produced, and if you love it, then it's all the same. but i guess people see it that after marriage both parents will have to be involved and before marriage one parent might have already bailed. although a parent can still bail after marriage, so it's the same.
I.Heart.Panic. King For A Couple Of Days Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 2019
December 19th, 2005 at 04:07pm
I don't really care, I don't think it matters all that much. I don't know, it just doesn't seem that big a deal to me. Like, if you're pregnant you can't exactly tell the baby to hold on a while, can you? And why have an abortion if you're ready for kids but not for a marriage? Some people don't see marriage as as important as having kids. My parents didn't. I was 9 months old when they married, you know, so it's not a big thing. And teenage mothers get a worse reputation than t hey deserve. Would you rather a child didn't have a father, or has a father and gets abused on a daily basis? Exactly.
I think it depends on the cirumstances. If your in a steady relationship and just dont want to get married but want children its fine. Coming from the view point of a child whose mother got pregnant before she was married, If they are younger I find it a bad idea. My parnets made poor choices and she got pregnant, now I have no father in my life, he was young and immature and left, which now leaves me making excuses for him as I just did. They should quit thinking about themselves and consider what this kid is going to go through before they have sex. Sex=kids, its very simple math. If you dont intend to have children, you better be protected, and even then, things happen. I was lucky enough that my mom got married when I was about 3 and I had a father figure in my life, well, until they got divorced when I was 9, but he is still an important part of my life.
So instead of thinking about if it is acceptable from the adults point of view, think about if from the kid getting caught up in it.
can't really blame anyone if you're preggers ... marriage is probs a better arrangement to raise a child in, but hey, to each her own... it's your life, you decide
Lucifers Angel King For A Couple Of Days Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 4751
can't really blame anyone if you're preggers ... marriage is probs a better arrangement to raise a child in, but hey, to each her own... it's your life, you decide
First of "preggers" isnt a word. Secondly, yeah you can! Whoever had sex is responsible for getting someone pregnant or being pregnant. Sex = kids, period. I dont care how many pills you take or if you use condoms, accidents happen, but you should except responsibility for your stupid actions.
Lucifers Angel King For A Couple Of Days Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 4751
February 16th, 2006 at 07:40pm
Does it matter when you have a child has long as your old enough and your able to look after it? My sister has got 2 kids and she's not married and she's not even intending to get married.
Does it matter when you have a child has long as your old enough and your able to look after it? My sister has got 2 kids and she's not married and she's not even intending to get married.
Exactly, my cousine got pregant and her boyfriend left her and most people in my family thought she wouldn't be able to cope. But now 7 years later and she has a house, a car and a job as well as a brilliant kid. She did it all on her own.
SARAnade King For A Couple Of Days Age: 35 Gender: Female Posts: 2228
February 16th, 2006 at 09:21pm
i think it is more fair for the child to grow up in a stable environment (family structure [ex: mom and dad] ), but if someone wants to have a child on thier own...all the more power to them!! i personally would wait until marraige to try and become pregnant. i think i would even wait until marraige to have sex...thats just me though..other people can do what they want!
Anji Basket Case Age: 35 Gender: Female Posts: 15914
February 17th, 2006 at 12:47am
If you're engaged or something to the person who's child you're carrying, then I guess it's not a big deal, cause you must think he's the right person then. But if not, then you have to face the consequences for your actions. Like my friend. Fourteen and pregnant. She'll have to deal with it herself then, because it is her fault, she took the chance, and now this is the consequence.
I think it's wrong to get an abortion though, but I'll save that for the other thread.
I dont really care.. I mean, if they're married - fine! Thats great! But if you then decide to split up, it takes a long time and thats painful for the children. I know that not-married couples can split up too, but i dunno.. i think its better (in MY personal opinion) to know that they havent sworn true love and all that in the church (if that might mean something special to oneself.) Marriage might seem more of a supporting .. i dunno.. something to one, and it might not. Married and not-married couples can love just as much either way. Marriage just cost more money. because of the whole wedding thing.
you only think it's wrong because you've had it shoved down your throat that it's wrong, obviously. because the only idea that anything like that might even BEGIN to be wrong all came about with religion.