Newspaper Pattern Analysis

AuthorMessage
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
King For A Couple Of Days
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 2921

Mibba
May 27th, 2006 at 09:53pm
Written during a panic attack, so if it seems disjointed, that was the point. It's kind of weird. =/ It was inspired by this strange true story I read mixed with my panic. That combination makes for some odd reading. XD

Newspaper Pattern Analysis

The echoes beat with the throb
Of the breath that won’t leave
Your tightened throat.
We all arrive at different times.

The air is just a bit late.

Do we really need the technique
Of bloodstain pattern analysis
To tell ourselves what went wrong?
Just listen to the reverberations;

Hope the echoes don’t fade away.

“Where are you?” Here in
Hallucinations, are you
Sure they aren’t real?
Maybe the images weren’t,

But it did drop twenty degrees.

“I can’t deal with you anymore.”
Why don’t you keep your resolution?
Walk out on me and I’ll try
Closing my eyes, but it turns out

Newspaper stories always read the same.
snowcherry
King For A Couple Of Days
snowcherry
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 3912
May 28th, 2006 at 05:49am
Hey, I loved that, honestly.
That was pretty cool. Wink
Peter Petrelli
King For A Couple Of Days
Peter Petrelli
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 4161
May 28th, 2006 at 05:56am
I really liked that Very Happy

I adore the title.

And the disjointed feel was effective... really awesome Very Happy
What's in a name?
King For A Couple Of Days
What's in a name?
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 2451

Mibba
May 28th, 2006 at 06:54am
I love it actually. The disjointed feel was affective. A lot of times it doesn’t work but you pulled it off! It’s not poetic in the sense of beauty, but still poetic in some wired way. I love how you construct your sentences. It doesn’t flow but I guess it wasn’t meant to. It’s better this way. [/rant]

A mighty fine poem, dear soulmate. Cool
Babi Kid Rachy
King For A Couple Of Days
Babi Kid Rachy
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 4512
May 28th, 2006 at 06:55am
Ohmy i love it!
Meski
Addict
Meski
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 14856

Blog
May 28th, 2006 at 06:57am
it's OK
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
King For A Couple Of Days
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 2921

Mibba
May 28th, 2006 at 08:53am
Thank you, my lovelies! Kiss

Glad to know the disjointed effect worked. ^.^
Jay Tee
Had A Life Before GSB
Jay Tee
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 26777

Mibba Blog
May 28th, 2006 at 09:17am
Wow that was pretty good. I like the single lines scattered through out and the way its disjointed. I'm a huge fan of weird time signatures in songs, so strange rhythms and patterns in poems are excellent. Fantastic stuff.
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
King For A Couple Of Days
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 2921

Mibba
May 28th, 2006 at 09:20am
Wow, thanks! Surprised I like weird time signatures too.
What's in a name?
King For A Couple Of Days
What's in a name?
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 2451

Mibba
May 28th, 2006 at 09:23am
^ as do I Cool
It Had to Be You.
King For A Couple Of Days
It Had to Be You.
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 3593
May 28th, 2006 at 09:57am
Meski:
it's OK
OK?

How is it OK when she has mastered everything in her poem? I don't think you even read it. -_-

And great job hun! Up I loved the second stanza.
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
King For A Couple Of Days
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 2921

Mibba
May 28th, 2006 at 10:01am
Haha, thank you Lisa. You needn't stick up for me; everyone has their own opinions. But thanks anyway. Luff choo. Very Happy
It Had to Be You.
King For A Couple Of Days
It Had to Be You.
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 3593
May 28th, 2006 at 10:06am
Luff choo too. Sorry, I get wicked defensive sometimes. XD
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