<b>Title:</b> The Art Of Losing
<b>Author:</b> Lore
<b>Pairing:</b> Rycer
<b>Summary: </b> Spencer and Ryan meet each other at school.
<b>Disclaimer: </b> Meh, not real. I wish.
<b>Note:</b> Thoughts are in italic
<b>Previous parts:</b> <a href="http://junkie-princess.livejournal.com/8611.html#cutid1"> part 1 </a>, <a href="http://junkie-princess.livejournal.com/9006.html#cutid1"> part 2 </a>, <a href="http://junkie-princess.livejournal.com/9220.html#cutid1"> part 3 </a>, <a href="http://junkie-princess.livejournal.com/9656.html#cutid1"> part 4 </a>, <a href="http://junkie-princess.livejournal.com/9730.html#cutid1"> part 5 </a>
<lj-cut text="The Art Of Losing">
<i>That’s okay for me,” he says. “I lo-like being around you.”</i> My heart cheers, on my face spreads a huge smile.
"And I li-love every minute I spend with you," I wink. He blinks and smiles from ear to ear.
We almost run out of the bus.
'I got an amp at home, so you don't have to take yours along.' Ryan is
getting his guitar case in the garage and this gives me time to read more of
the words on the walls of his room. <i>'And how come you couldn't reject hate
like some reject the love they are getting?'</i> I scare a bit whe in feel his hand I on my shoulder.
'Please, Spencer, don' t read them,' he sighs. 'Let's go and play
something.' He grabs his guitar and gets out of the room as quickly he can.
We walk next to each other, not saying a word. The silence makes me feel
sad, sad that I hurt him once again.
"Don't be sad, boy, please. I'll explain it later, when I can. I'm just not
ready to share it with someone. I hope you understand this..."
"It's okay. Tell me if you feel like. I just thought you were mad at me or
something."
"Why should I?"
"I don't know."
"Besides I can't stand you pouting." I really don't know what I have to think about him or his behaviour. My heart beats in my throat and I'm feeling good. Fantastic actually. But my mind doesn't think the same way as my heart does. And that is what confuses the shit out of me. <i>You don't know what he feels, Spencer. Just keep him as a friend. He's not the way like you think you are. And if he says such things again, leave them behind. They're just 'scene' like he is.</i> What the hell? I wish I could turn of my mind.
I search the amplifier in the back corner of the garage. My eye falls on the acoustic guitar that stands there too. <i>Why don't you play something for him. If you want to show him what you feel</i> I wonder where that voice comes from. It's the first time I hear it. And God, I liked that one and his ideas. I take the amp and the guitar to the front of the garage, where my drum kit stands. Where Ryan is waiting. He gives me a questioning look when he sees the acoustic guitar in my hand.
"I just.. I.. I can play one song," I mutter and smirk, to hide my feelings that express on my face.
"Well go ahead, play some for me," he says, slightly amused.
"Are you sure? I mean I totally suck at guitar..."
"Yep, totally sure." I sit on the ground, cross-legged, with the guitar on my lap.
"Okay, I'll try. But don't dare to laugh, R-Ryan." That was just in time to change my mistake. It makes me even more nervous than I am. What if he gets the message and think it's disgusting? What if he doesn't get the message. What if.. What if... That question makes me crazy. My hands starts to play the first chords of Swing Life Away, one of my favourite songs from Rise Against. I start to sing and don't dare to look up at Ryan. I blushed when I sang 'Are we getting closer or we just getting more lost?' I just stared at my hands and was dead ashamed that I ever dared to play that to him. I mute all bad voices in my head and play the rest of the song without thinking about anything else than the chords. When the song's done, a sigh of relief escapes from my mouth.
"That was beautiful!" Ryan squeaks. "Now it's my turn, it takes two to love." He picks up his guitar and starts to play Everlong from the Foo Fighters.
"Hello, I've waited here for you, everlong,' he sings and looks straight into my eyes. "Tonight, I throw myself into..." He keeps singing and comes closer to me, still looking in my eyes. "...waste away with me, alone with me..." He's so close now, that our noses almost touch. My eyes still gazing into his and his into mine. Electric shocks are going up and down my spine. His lips touch mine and my head is bursting. Fireworks explodes in my body. "Slow how, you wanted it to be, I'm over my head, out of my head I sing.." He whispers, his lips touching mine when he pronounces every word. After the last word, we lose ourself in each other. His tongue brushes against my lips. His tongue meets mine, he tastes like fresh menthol. I break the kiss and gasp for air.
"That was ..." I begin
"Amazing," he finishes my sentence and puts his guitar away. "What about you?"
"Yeah, Amazing." I can't bring out more words. My body is bewitched and my lips are purnt. I couldn't even dream about this. We sit down, leaning against the wall. Ryan starts to sing softly. "And I wonder..."
"When I sing along with you, if everything could ever feel this real forever. If anything could ever be this good again," I join him.
"Do you mean what you sing?" he asks.
"Sure. I could never lie to you, Ry." He puts his head against mine, sings softly in my ear, "The only thing I'll ever ask of you, you've got to promise not to stop when I say when."
Songs: Swing Life Away . Rise Against
Everlong . Foo Fighters
I dedicate this to <lj user="_sofiej_"> and Axelle.
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ik ben benieuwd of er al een deel 6 is.
hehe xD sry