| Author | Message |
|---|
Explicit Sins.
Geek
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 231
  | July 17th, 2006 at 05:25am my friends say it's hard to explain
how that i'm not girly ,not sane
i don't say "cute" like thay do
cause i don't use the same voucabulary that they use
they gasp and gape , when i say i don't look like the girls who wear "the gap"
don't wanna look like those girls on MTV
they're skinny !so what ? bite me!
my friends say i'm wierd
only cuz i like to read!
my friends say i'm a freak
cuz i like bieng a geek
and my sense of style really reeks
my friends say i'm an idiot
only cuz i love the movie "Billy Elliot"
my friends are all losers
cuz they're beggers not choosers
my friends are all idiots cuz they didn't show me what a friend really is
my friends are all fakers
cuz they're followers not leaders
so to all my friends...
i hope you crash in your Mercedez-Benz |
tomamazon
GSBitch
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 68084
| July 17th, 2006 at 01:35pm Um...I don't really like it.
The idea is cool, it could be progressed into something, but no..
The rhyming seems forced and its a little choppy.
Sián
xxx |
Skullivan.[Im Not Okay]
Geek
![Skullivan.[Im Not Okay]](/data/board-avatars/empty.gif)
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 225 | July 17th, 2006 at 01:39pm Immortal Whispers:Um...I don't really like it.
The idea is cool, it could be progressed into something, but no..
The rhyming seems forced and its a little choppy.
Sián
xxx
i agree |
Peter Petrelli
King For A Couple Of Days
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 4161 | July 17th, 2006 at 01:40pm It's an idea that's been used so many times before, and it would take a lot to pull it off. The rhyme was so forced, and the flow was virtually non existant. I guess it could be improved; if you insist on writing in rhyme then you should try to write it to a rhythm. And into stanzas. |
Addison Montgomery.
Falling In Love With The Board
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 7078
| July 17th, 2006 at 01:42pm international_idiot:It's an idea that's been used so many times before, and it would take a lot to pull it off. The rhyme was so forced, and the flow was virtually non existant. I guess it could be improved; if you insist on writing in rhyme then you should try to write it to a rhythm. And into stanzas. Double that |
Comic tragedy
Idiot
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 546 | July 17th, 2006 at 01:48pm Uhhh... if I had friends who were that different from me, I'd set them on fire. And the poem sorta has no sense. It's kinda like a blahhhhh poem. Could use some improvement. |
ohmygodshutyourbutt
Idiot
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 769
| July 17th, 2006 at 01:53pm Then why are they your friends if you hate them? |
ohmygodshutyourbutt
Idiot
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 769
| July 17th, 2006 at 01:53pm Immortal Whispers:Um...I don't really like it.
The idea is cool, it could be progressed into something, but no..
The rhyming seems forced and its a little choppy.
Sián
xxx
I second this. |
[Broken Pretty]
Idiot
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 572 | July 18th, 2006 at 12:26am i didnt like the poem.
i understand the problem with your friends.
read 'toliet cubicle'
i wrote it and thats how im feeling with my friends now... major suckage. |
