Author | Message |
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Inari King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: 37 Gender: Female Posts: 2538 | July 22nd, 2006 at 07:15pm I think the sadist in me is snatching the pen from my hands at the moment.
Unravelling your knotted limbs from mine with tear-ravished eyes.
They glow with eclipses under retreating moonlight and smiles
are hard to suppress in response to apocalyptic heartbreak.
"I'm sorry, darling, did my viper words murder the mood you cast?
Bayonet serenades were never an ideal seduction but then
I was never the best sweet-talker when my words left a bitter aftertaste.
Always had a tendency for airing the sadist in me at the worst time.
I'd force my lips into pouted apologies but I'm unable to control
my mind when it's not rummaging for inspiration in the gutter.
Slide between the covers with me. It could use some exorcising."
I'm not trying to break your heart. Just striving to bruise it.
This is payback, sweetheart, but you still writhe with indecision.
Believe every word I utter, honey. Let me have my way with you.
My mouth is still bruised from the kisses that you urged onto me
under the restraint-numbing guise of supposed infatuation and now
it's working over-time just to touch you the way I wish my hands could.
If you only knew where it's been, sugar, but lips will always lie
the way that bodies will on dust-bitten mattresses after dark;
taut and twisted with a misplaced smile and ecstasy beneath the rim.
I'll pretend to love you after the kicks if you pretend you don't care.
But the world spins into reaction before we can even unite our
lack of responsibility and scorch our way through your doubt.
Gasps fall muted under footsteps forced on gravel paths and
lust falls surprisingly speechless when I'm forcing myself onto you.
"Re-adjust your skirt, my misused angel, I can hear my parents
pulling up just when we were getting..." Intense headlights burn
through the window; prying, firefly eyes shining with enigmas.
Single hearts need empty houses to act out ringside romances.
One day I'll move you further than I shunt your emotions.
Sly smiles show they know our agenda without reading the streaks
of sweat that we scribed on the mattress; our ecstatic journals.
And you burn so beautifully in lust-blushed embarrassment.
They can question the tears and blisters on the bedsheets
but lips will always lie. And, tonight, your lips are mine. |
Toxic Teeth Idiot
 Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 645
 | July 22nd, 2006 at 07:18pm Why do right such Beautiful and Amazing poems?
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FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: 34 Gender: Female Posts: 2921
| July 22nd, 2006 at 07:35pm I love the ending. Perfect. You know, we need to come up with a new word or something for your poems. But for now, I'll just say snazzy.  |
Inari King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: 37 Gender: Female Posts: 2538 | July 23rd, 2006 at 05:28am Awww thank you guys.
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Santa Billie Falling In Love With The Board
 Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 8285 | July 23rd, 2006 at 05:42am Wow, you write really well.
That is beautiful indeed.
Keep writing  |
Peter Petrelli King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: 35 Gender: Female Posts: 4161 | July 23rd, 2006 at 06:03am Hardcore Panda!!1:You know, we need to come up with a new word or something for your poems. But for now, I'll just say snazzy. 
How about... humdinging?
I love it. There was just something so scathing about it, I loved it. |
Inari King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: 37 Gender: Female Posts: 2538 | July 23rd, 2006 at 06:43am 
Thank you, guys.
And Ellen, the new word rocks. |
Lissie! Falling In Love With The Board
 Age: 31 Gender: Female Posts: 7305
 | July 23rd, 2006 at 08:45am That's awesome! And I love the ending so much. |
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: 34 Gender: Female Posts: 2921
| July 23rd, 2006 at 11:28am international_idiot:Hardcore Panda!!1:You know, we need to come up with a new word or something for your poems. But for now, I'll just say snazzy. 
How about... humdinging?
I love it. There was just something so scathing about it, I loved it. Hurry up and write a new poem! I wanna use it!  |
Inari King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: 37 Gender: Female Posts: 2538 | July 23rd, 2006 at 11:55am Hardcore Panda!!1:Hurry up and write a new poem! I wanna use it! 

*grabs pen and paper*
There was a young man from Peru
who tried to build a canoe.
He took it to the lake
to find by mistake
he hadn't used waterproof glue.
How's that? |
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: 34 Gender: Female Posts: 2921
| July 23rd, 2006 at 01:54pm Inari:Hardcore Panda!!1:Hurry up and write a new poem! I wanna use it! 

*grabs pen and paper*
There was a young man from Peru
who tried to build a canoe.
He took it to the lake
to find by mistake
he hadn't used waterproof glue.
How's that? Now that was humdinging!
 |
11th Street Kid King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: - Gender: - Posts: 3645 | July 23rd, 2006 at 02:25pm  Gahhhhhh.
It was... -insert an intelligent word meaning 'good' here-
Perfect ending too. |
Inari King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: 37 Gender: Female Posts: 2538 | July 23rd, 2006 at 02:27pm *Blue Star*: Gahhhhhh.
It was... -insert an intelligent word meaning 'good' here-
Perfect ending too.
Awww.
Thank you, honey.
 |
snowcherry King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: 36 Gender: Female Posts: 3912 | July 24th, 2006 at 03:29pm Fuck.... that was amazing. |
rollerpig GSBitch
 Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 62283 | July 24th, 2006 at 03:39pm AMAZINGSRGWTH. |
Inari King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: 37 Gender: Female Posts: 2538 | July 24th, 2006 at 03:44pm
Thank you guys. |
paper shoes This Board Is My Home
 Age: 34 Gender: Female Posts: 34269 | July 25th, 2006 at 04:37pm Oh, fuck.
I love it. O__O |
SugarGreen King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 3369 | July 26th, 2006 at 12:18am "I think the sadist in me is snatching the pen from my hands at the moment." -understatement
I look at that and I see WORDS!!! Lots of them... to the point that I think you are writing a novel instead of a poem.
I see zero rhyme, zero rythm, and zero counting out of syllables. Is it even a POEM?
The word, and, is never capitalized and it does not begin a sentance.
Apart from being the worst critic...
The craftsmanship you use for description is amazingly great. |
Peter Petrelli King For A Couple Of Days
 Age: 35 Gender: Female Posts: 4161 | July 26th, 2006 at 09:29am Jaguire13:I see zero rhyme, zero rythm, and zero counting out of syllables. Is it even a POEM?
I thought poetry was about expression.  |
Addison Montgomery. Falling In Love With The Board
 Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 7078
 | July 26th, 2006 at 11:31am I wanna learn how to write poems like Inari because she just makes them that little bit more unique in a way. |