I Could Be In Your Shoes

I realize I haven't posted here for a few weeks, so here's a new one. It's about how you see a person such as a homeless person, a druggy, any less fortunate person and you wonder why you are you and not them, and what separates you from them. Oh and I changed me username. I used to be rejectallamerican. So I am she. Anywho, this could turn into a co-write, but this is my version as of now.

One fateful time down on the street
I saw a shadow of what I might lose
The cracks in the sidewalk led back to my feet
And we were wearing the same shoes

Our eyes never met but it stared me down
And I couldn't help but wonder why
I couldn't respond with my conscience around
So it turned away with a sigh

Our problems make us who we are
We weren't separated at birth
Time gives us our identities
And it seems you are what you're worth

[chorus]
I can't read your thoughts through the look on your face
What I see in your eyes is not love or hate
When our eyes meet I see myself in your gaze
And I wonder who has decided our fate
'Cause I could be in your shoes too
We could share the same misfortunes
But our problems are as different as our memories
And it's strange to think I envy you

How can I be so close to you
When I don’t even know your name?
How can we be such strangers
Yet live under the same rain?

Well it seems we’re the same person
You’re problems are no different than mine
I am your past; and you my future
So we’ll meet again in time

Although I have a place that’s home
And though you have taken a fall
We both have a memory in common
And now we aren’t so different at all

Mediocre.

What can I fix then?

I'm curious...if it's just mediocre, what is it I can do better?

I don't know, I really liked it. It had a good flow. I absolutely loved the first stanza. It seemed somehow dreamy or something.

Thanks very much! I'm glad you like it anyway. I really appreciate it!