insomniac<3333
Geek
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 246 | November 26th, 2006 at 02:51am ok this is my first real poem, so it's not that good and it's kind of short. but i'm posting it anyway.
being is an elusive thing
we try hard to capture the meaning of life
but mankind is unforbearing
creating illusory therories
for comfort's sake
being is an elusive thing
and it always will be--
until time's end.
feedback?? i won't freak out if you criticize it so tell the truth. |
Riot on the Radio
Jackass
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 1841
 | November 26th, 2006 at 03:18am I don't really like it. Sorry.  |
Peter Petrelli
King For A Couple Of Days
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 4161 | November 26th, 2006 at 06:41am It could've been okay but to be quite honest it didn't really make much sense. I understand what you were trying to do, but it didn't quite work; you need to describe more and get your point across. |
