A beautiful wedding

I posted this peom once before, but I changed it around and added some more stanzas. I was inspired by the song I Write sins Not Tragidies and the Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge cover. Hope you like it!! ♥

A scent of lavender fills the dark depressing room,
As the beautiful bride walks to her waiting groom.
Her heart beats faster with every step she takes,
But still in the back of her mind, is this all a mistake?

A smile on his face, he grabs her hand,
She looks into his eyes, his emerald green eyes, and,
The bride‘s groom begins his vows, lovingly and true.
While the bride battles her demons, Can you make it through?

Suddenly, her dress becomes lathered with blood,
Oozes off the bride’s face and onto the floor.
It runs down her wrists, across his neck,
It covers the walls, it covers the door.

The bystanders seem to ignore it.
They don't seem to notice that there wrists are slit.
A tear runs down her blood stained face,
And yet, the gloomy bride stands in place.

Looking at her loving groom,
Run, run out of the room!
Scared and confused she runs down the aisle,
Everyone gasps in shock and turn to see her, meanwhile….

The blood still remains on the unknowing faces ,
It leaves mistaken traces,
Of secrets and lies that they’ve all hid,
from the past that they’ve kept within.

The blood drenched bride runs from the church corridor,
She pushes past guests, runs through the doors.
She looks back and sees the blood disappear,
Commitment, my dear, is you’re greatest fear.

Don’t you see, beautiful bride, you can’t escape your fears.
We’re with you always, never to disappear.
So run, run away and hide
‘Cause your beloved can’t keep those feelings inside.

Turn away and don’t come back,
All the feelings that he has is what you lack.
So just leave him, beautiful bride,
And maybe next time…..

What a beautiful wedding,
On this beautiful day.

I like it! It's very descriptive and morbid. I likehow you used the blood to explain what the bride is thinking. It's great! *10*

love it

Ghostie.:

I like it! It's very descriptive and morbid. I likehow you used the blood to explain what the bride is thinking. It's great! *10*

love it

Wow. I love how you wrote this poem.
I always like simple rhyming in poems.
But yours took it a step further. It was truly a great poem.
I love how you ended it, and I love how you wrote it.
Some bits didn't seem to flow, but.
Imperfection is the only thing thats makes something perfect.
Good work

Thanks! I almost got frounded from the computer when i was working on it! Spent almost.......two hours on it. Hehe.

Normally, I hate rhyming poetry, but I do say, this was good. Some of your rhymes were cliche, but I think that you made up for it with the images and story that's being told.

Very well done.

Oh, and just a suggestion- you should try to write some non-rhyming, free verse poetry. Just focus on the images and metaphors and stuff. You'd be great at it.

If you already DO write like that... Sorry. I don't come here much..

I try to have my poems always rhyme.....its a habit....i've done free verse before. Thanks for the advice tho! ^.^

Pretty Hate Machine x3:

I try to have my poems always rhyme.....its a habit....i've done free verse before. Thanks for the advice tho! ^.^

Right. I figured as such. It's just that rhyming is more classical-esque, and therefore, overdone. But, I mean, you ARE good at it. The poem is still awesome.

Just suggestions. Although I REALLY think you'd be SO much better at doing more modern poetry.

I used to always rhyme as well, and then I took a creative writing course here at Purdue, and rhyming was not allowed. I was pissed, to say the least. But then, I realized that you are always limited in what you really want to convey in a poem by rhymes. For a while, I started doing alliteration in order to try to save a part of my writing style. But then, I finally just abandoned it, and people tell me that my writing is so much better. I don't really know if it is or not... I just know that I like writing this way better because it allows me to say what I need to get out without limiting my word choice.

But as I said, do whatever you want. What works for me may not work for you.

oh wow....no, no i've neen workling on some free verse....fell free to judge me on it....advice only helps me XD

This, my dear, is very good.
You have a LOT of talent.

Mind you, some of the rhyming was a little but off, but it didn't take away from the poems beauty THAT much.

I especially love the italics ending. Amazing.

You're going to go places, love. I just know it.

Excellent job, as always.

i liked it!!! it was very good