SugarGreen
King For A Couple Of Days
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 3369 | October 24th, 2007 at 09:17am Here I am a sinner
trying to teach others
not to sin
It is a hard task
to turn myself around
and my whole world
is looking upside down
War and Peace carry guns
each meaning to stop the other
and all we seem to do
is to hate each other
Here I am a sinner
who am I to speak
the voice of experience?
maybe I'm not so meek
after all
the meek inherit the earth
and I have none
while War and Peace carry guns. |
Jax.
Was Here Two Weeks Ago
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 42834 | October 24th, 2007 at 07:04pm Omg I like it because it's all contradicty and stuff.  |
SugarGreen
King For A Couple Of Days
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 3369 | October 24th, 2007 at 09:41pm Thank you  |
givemyselfthecreeps!
Falling In Love With The Board
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 8866 | October 31st, 2007 at 01:07pm Yes I also like the contradiction. I think it's kool how u only used rhyme in certain places. |
newagecarny
Was Here Two Weeks Ago
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 42495
 | October 31st, 2007 at 01:27pm I think the use of stanzas would come in handy next time. Just an idea. |
paper shoes
This Board Is My Home
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34269 | October 31st, 2007 at 07:00pm I liked the poem but repeating ''War and Peace carry guns'' in the end seems unneccessary. |
