Neutrality.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell

I try to empty this wretched volume
of sweet tears from my stomach.
I try and try but they stay hidden in
the depths of myself. Those tears
lock myself in a cage of anxiety. I beat
my hand against the wall and whisper
softly for some description of peace.

I have to worship you, a saint. An
angel of my sanity. And yet, my promise
broken, it's contents spilled over the floor
like some ghastly child's bank, spilt into
unfixable shards that even you couldn't fix.
My supposed fallen tears like a thousand
pennies, yet the bank is empty, cleaned out,
someone has robbed this child of it's money.

You call angels to watch over me and Saint
Andrew is glued to my side, and yet,
I don't like angels. Their blessed heads of
spun sunshine, gowns of golden gorgeousness,
wings that span acres, a thousand flocks
of doves per wing, master-bating sordid rainbows,
and a smile too full of shining opals.
The very thought of haloes gives me shivers.

So cast away these angel kisses. I am not condoning
demons to latch themselves into my sanity,
no, not ever, please understand, those wretched
souls cloaked on starless night skies and
spilled innocent blood scare me more than the
angels repeatative chorus that haunts my nights
and screws with my daytime.

Oh to have the life I once lived, impossible.
For now, before I make any specific descion
on my moral standing ground, I'll stay
in a dormant demented state of neutrality,
haunted by demons and angels,
and cursed by damned words that dictate my life
and follow my every path like some
enigmatic puppy, lost from it's mother.

It sucked and made no sense.

Charlie Calling.:

I think that this is one of your best.

I thought it was absolutely amazing, and by far your best to date. It made complete sense to me. I think. I mean, poetry is open to interpretation, but I was able to gain a feasible meaning from it. I adore it.

Wow, I really adored that. I love the whole angels and demons aspect of it, and the metaphor with the money bank. Just wow.

it's super-dooper! ignore the negative stuff! keep it up!

MY BRAIN IS WHACKED.



"Don't Ask, Don't Tell

I try to empty this wretched volume
of sweet tears from my stomach.
I try and try but they stay hidden in
the depths of myself. Those tears
lock" (ME) "in a cage of anxiety. I beat
my hand against the wall and whisper
softly for some description of peace."

THOUGHT: "my in a cage of anxiety." It did not make sense.

"I have to worship you, a saint. An
angel of my sanity. And yet, my promise
broken, it's contents spilled over the floor
like some ghastly child's bank, spilt into
unfixable shards that even you couldn't fix.
My supposed fallen tears like a thousand
pennies, yet the bank is empty, cleaned out,
someone has robbed this child of it's money."

THOUGHT: A child is a HIM or HER, not an IT.


"You call angels to watch over me and Saint
Andrew is glued to my side, and yet,
I don't like angels. Their blessed heads of
spun sunshine, gowns of golden gorgeousness,
wings that span acres, a thousand flocks
of doves per wing, master-bating sordid rainbows,
and a smile too full of shining opals.
The very thought of haloes gives me shivers."

THOUGHT: "I have to worship you, a saint. An
angel of my sanity." Then suddenly... "I don't like angels."
WHY? What did the "angels" do to deserve this distaste all of a sudden?"

"So cast away these angel kisses. I am not condoning
demons to latch themselves into my sanity,
no, not ever, please understand, those wretched
souls cloaked on starless night skies and" (try WHO instead of and)
"spilled innocent blood scare me more than the
angels repeatative chorus that haunts my nights
and screws with my daytime."

THOUGHT: AHAH! You don't like the "angels" singing because it scares you. Why couldn't you say that before and why does the singing scare you?


"Oh to have the life I once lived, " (try ... instead of ,) "impossible.
For now, before I make any specific descion" (decision)
"on my moral standing ground," (remove the word ground) "I'll stay
in a dormant" (COMMA) "demented state of neutrality,
haunted by demons and angels,
and" (remove the word and) "cursed by damned words that dictate my life
and follow my every path like some
enigmatic puppy, lost from it's mother."


THOUGHT: In other words:

You are trying to stop crying because you are scared from listening to angels singing, and of demons. You cannot decide what your moral stance is. You feel empty and lost. Am I correct in this assumption?

Apologia Pro Poemate Meo

First off, sorry that I made your brain feel whacked.

Jaguire13:

THOUGHT: "my in a cage of anxiety." It did not make sense.

My mistake. It has been altered. I don't really pay much attention when I write, I let it flow.

Jaguire13:

THOUGHT: A child is a HIM or HER, not an IT.

I didn't want to specify a sex, as in any random kid off the street. It seemed right.

Jaguire13:

THOUGHT: "I have to worship you, a saint. An
angel of my sanity." Then suddenly... "I don't like angels."
WHY? What did the "angels" do to deserve this distaste all of a sudden?"

There was a hint of sarcasm and bitter resentment. Sorry if I didn't make it clear.

Also, split personality disorder. Indeed.

Also, I wanted to show that in my opinion, angels are not all pure and saintly. Like I said, don't ask, don't tell.

Jaguire13:

THOUGHT: AHAH! You don't like the "angels" singing because it scares you. Why couldn't you say that before and why does the singing scare you?

If you heard angels singing at you night and day , boy, it would scare you.
But I was speaking metaphorically. Angels singing=people singing their own praises. Yeah, it's confusing, you'll live.

Jaguire13:

souls cloaked on starless night skies and" (try WHO instead of and)
"spilled innocent blood scare me more than the

I meant as in a list. It was to describe the colours of their wings. Like, dark red and black?

Jaguire13:

"Oh to have the life I once lived, " (try ... instead of ,) "impossible.

I hate hate hate using ellipisis in poetry, it always teases me as sloppy. I use it a lot when I'm just crashing on the boards though.

Jaguire13:

THOUGHT: In other words:

You are trying to stop crying because you are scared from listening to angels singing, and of demons. You cannot decide what your moral stance is. You feel empty and lost. Am I correct in this assumption?

I actually made a point, I thiught well that I wanted to cry but couldn't. Boy, i need to say things more clearly.
The whole thing is a metaphor for a billion and six things happing in my life and, yes, I feel empty and lost, but honestly, who can say that they don't feel even the slightest unfulfilled or confused at one point in their lives.

Conclusively, I am a crazy teenage poet who hates children, angels and their so-called elevation from you us humans. I have a lot of resentment and confusion which is boiling under my skin and I find this a helpful way of releasing the pressure creatively instead of going out and killing someone. . Thank you for your rather through analyzation.

also, my spelling sucks. ditto the punctuation.

gd

Charlie Calling.:

K9's #1 Dog Groomer <3:

It sucked and made no sense.

Do you write poetry?

If not, please don't say it makes no sense, because it most probably relates to the poets thoughts...


I think that this is one of your best.

Yeah, it fucking ruled!

Tis true.
You write awesome poems.