mybassgoesdirntdirntdirnt
Geek
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 150
 | December 24th, 2006 at 12:48am Silent Screams
The millions of armies
march across our lands.
Our homes and villiages
are destroyed with no plans.
All before my eyes
the blood is shed.
everyone i once knew
are so brutally dead.
all my childhood friends
all the families of love.
they perished right here
now i know what war is made of.
War made of armies, war made of blood
war made of guns, war made violence
War made at the sight of everyone falling
Now theres none, can't you hear the silence?
Nothing left but the silent screams
never could nothing sound so loud.
soliders eyes looking forward
marching on pain; I hope they're proud. |
DudeO
King For A Couple Of Days
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 2543
| December 24th, 2006 at 07:57pm Nothing left but the silent screams
never could nothing sound so loud.
soliders eyes looking forward
marching on pain; I hope they're proud.
That part was amazing.
Everything else is sort of... well it's a start. It's okay, I guess. I like the last stanza the best though, some of it could be rewritten to be better. |
