My palm

I'm riding along
I decide to jump off a
Ramp and it falls down

I'm sliding along
I shove my hand into the
Sharp black gravel and

When I get up there
Is a circle cut from my
Right hand palm it still

Tingles like it did
On that day when I used my
Palm in that harsh way.

I liked it alot!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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~ It's like a gallery of someone else's nightmare ~
Billie Joe

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~ Love is not like anything especially a fuckin knife ~

The only criticism I'd give is, riding along what? I thought that spoilt the flow a little, which was a shame because I really liked it. I love conceptual pieces like this. Short and sweet, but could perhaps benefit from some punctuation.

Tabby Delany:

The only criticism I'd give is, riding along what? I thought that spoilt the flow a little, which was a shame because I really liked it. I love conceptual pieces like this. Short and sweet, but could perhaps benefit from some punctuation.

It is a haiku so I couldn't exactly put anymore info into it and keep the haiku format.

Oh, fair enough then. I just considered something like 'pacing', or something more descriptive. I'm very slow, I didn't notice the haiku structure. I'd admire people who can write good haikus, short and sweet has never been my skill.

The haiku is about me riding my bike years ago.