Ragdoll.

Sullen in your opiates, your grin was too wide.
Your eyes too cold and wet, like frogspawn.
This is humanity, bare of all it's toil and shame.
Drunken and singing and too happy.
Then the sudden pirouette. You yell.
Ankles are so fragile nowadays.

We had to get you home. Ethanol is too easy
on you, coaxing you silently into an etherised
sleep. Oh, speed the dreams of a better clime
to your head. You need the comfort when
sobriety knocks you down and spits you out
with a spritz of cirrhosis. What a lovely
swan you were, my old friend, while
you didn't know who you were.

there is a slight hint of panic at the disco to your poetry
not in a bad way but in the way that you both seem to portray powerful,
almost gruesome images yet in the most beautiful kind of ways
"spritz of cirrhosis" i dont know why but that phrase in particular stood out
its a very orginal poem with great structure and style
Id love to be able to write like this
or even to understand what forced this poem to be forged in your brain it is truly amazing.

I like it, especially the endings to both the verses/stanzas. It hooked me from the begininning. The only bit I didn't like was the use of the word 'frogspawn' as it slightly upset the rhythm and theme but well done, really good:]]x x x