Letters From Home, chapter 1
July 4, 1994
Dear Billie Tre, and Mike,
Congratz on the marriage, Billie! Sorry I couldn't make it, I had to work... You know how my boss gets if I have to skip for stuff like that. I'm sure it was beautiful, though. Did Tre do (or say) anything stupid, like he did at my wedding? It took me forever to fix the sculpture, and the preist mentioned to me that if I should have another wedding, not to involve him to do the honors. Can I expect mini-Billies or mini-Adriennes? If so, any time soon? Because I would love to corrupt any kids of yours. If you don't beat me to it, that is. And don't pull the, 'I don't corrupt anyone' shit, beacuse, after all, it was YOU 3 that brought me into the punk world.
Anyway. Welcome to the sweet world that I will never know, aka, fame. So, has Dookie made top charts? It should, because it has in my sweet mind. Tre, All By Myself is the best song I've ever heard, even if it's coming from you. And if you are doing the infamous, 'I told you so' jig, that is forever burned into my mind, so please tell me I never have to see it again. And, GUESS WHAT, BOYS? I'm coming to visit next week, wether you like it or not. So you better get Cali-for-ni-a ready for me, because HERE I COME!
Not the evil poop throwing monkeys!
-Mia
P.S. To answer Tre's question, I will NOT be needing him any time soon.
***
July 6, 1994
Dear Mia,
As you probably expected, yes, Tre did do something, (and said something) stupid at my and Adrienne's wedding. He knocked over a candle, setting a tree on fire, and, during the ceremony, he yelled,
"IS THIS GOING TO TAKE ANY LONGER? I HAVE A GIRL TO FUCK!"
Honestly, I think that was worse than throwing a shoe at a sculpture and shouting if anyone had any shit on them. But, that's the Tre we met when we were 5, right? Hasn't grown up much (except for physical, ahem, anomalies. ) in the few years you've been gone. Yes, we will have kids, Adie's already pregnant. We found out the day after the wedding. And no kids of mine are going to be corrupted by you, if I have anything to say about it. That's what I have Tre for. I have used my writing space (damn) and the guys want to write, too, so bye.
Yes, the evil poop throwing monkeys!
-Billie Joe
Dear Mia,
TRE IS SUCH AN ASSHOLE! HE DRANK MY SODA! And you know how I get when he does that, and he just did it for the millionth fucking time! One of these days... So, how's Texas? Billie told us you were coming to visit... Maybe he wants us to sic Tre on you, I wouldn't know. Heh heh, wouldn't that be a funny sight? Tre foaming at the mouth, on a leash? He he. I should make him do that sometime, on a dare, maybe. But it'll have to wait until you get here, I don't want you to miss it! Well, I guess I'm gonna let Tre write, he's bugging the shit out of me.
What evil poop throwing monkeys?
-Mike
Dear Mia,
WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO GET HERE? I miss your kissies. (I'm laughin my ass off, cuz I wrote 'kissies' and thats your word) And your rack. Just kidding about the rack, although I miss the ass. Anyway, Mike is restraining from chopping me up with a machete all because I ACCIDENTLY drank his soda. Soda is, like, sacred to him or something, ya know? Although Billie forgot to tell you, Dookie ran up the charts as soon as it was released. But I TOLD you I could sing, but no, you wouldn't listen. I though you liked Dominated Love Slave, though. But I can't freaking wait until you get here. Billie says I can't light another tree on fire when you get here... Damn. I wanted to show you what happened. Love you, I'll see you when you get here!
The evil poop throwing monkeys are under my command!
- Tre
P.S. What did you mean when you said you wouldn't be needing me?
Dear Billie Tre, and Mike,
Congratz on the marriage, Billie! Sorry I couldn't make it, I had to work... You know how my boss gets if I have to skip for stuff like that. I'm sure it was beautiful, though. Did Tre do (or say) anything stupid, like he did at my wedding? It took me forever to fix the sculpture, and the preist mentioned to me that if I should have another wedding, not to involve him to do the honors. Can I expect mini-Billies or mini-Adriennes? If so, any time soon? Because I would love to corrupt any kids of yours. If you don't beat me to it, that is. And don't pull the, 'I don't corrupt anyone' shit, beacuse, after all, it was YOU 3 that brought me into the punk world.
Anyway. Welcome to the sweet world that I will never know, aka, fame. So, has Dookie made top charts? It should, because it has in my sweet mind. Tre, All By Myself is the best song I've ever heard, even if it's coming from you. And if you are doing the infamous, 'I told you so' jig, that is forever burned into my mind, so please tell me I never have to see it again. And, GUESS WHAT, BOYS? I'm coming to visit next week, wether you like it or not. So you better get Cali-for-ni-a ready for me, because HERE I COME!
Not the evil poop throwing monkeys!
-Mia
P.S. To answer Tre's question, I will NOT be needing him any time soon.
***
July 6, 1994
Dear Mia,
As you probably expected, yes, Tre did do something, (and said something) stupid at my and Adrienne's wedding. He knocked over a candle, setting a tree on fire, and, during the ceremony, he yelled,
"IS THIS GOING TO TAKE ANY LONGER? I HAVE A GIRL TO FUCK!"
Honestly, I think that was worse than throwing a shoe at a sculpture and shouting if anyone had any shit on them. But, that's the Tre we met when we were 5, right? Hasn't grown up much (except for physical, ahem, anomalies. ) in the few years you've been gone. Yes, we will have kids, Adie's already pregnant. We found out the day after the wedding. And no kids of mine are going to be corrupted by you, if I have anything to say about it. That's what I have Tre for. I have used my writing space (damn) and the guys want to write, too, so bye.
Yes, the evil poop throwing monkeys!
-Billie Joe
Dear Mia,
TRE IS SUCH AN ASSHOLE! HE DRANK MY SODA! And you know how I get when he does that, and he just did it for the millionth fucking time! One of these days... So, how's Texas? Billie told us you were coming to visit... Maybe he wants us to sic Tre on you, I wouldn't know. Heh heh, wouldn't that be a funny sight? Tre foaming at the mouth, on a leash? He he. I should make him do that sometime, on a dare, maybe. But it'll have to wait until you get here, I don't want you to miss it! Well, I guess I'm gonna let Tre write, he's bugging the shit out of me.
What evil poop throwing monkeys?
-Mike
Dear Mia,
WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO GET HERE? I miss your kissies. (I'm laughin my ass off, cuz I wrote 'kissies' and thats your word) And your rack. Just kidding about the rack, although I miss the ass. Anyway, Mike is restraining from chopping me up with a machete all because I ACCIDENTLY drank his soda. Soda is, like, sacred to him or something, ya know? Although Billie forgot to tell you, Dookie ran up the charts as soon as it was released. But I TOLD you I could sing, but no, you wouldn't listen. I though you liked Dominated Love Slave, though. But I can't freaking wait until you get here. Billie says I can't light another tree on fire when you get here... Damn. I wanted to show you what happened. Love you, I'll see you when you get here!
The evil poop throwing monkeys are under my command!
- Tre
P.S. What did you mean when you said you wouldn't be needing me?
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