So alone. Or am I?, chapter 1
I pushed my long, straight black hair out of my eyes, as I resurfaced for the day. I glanced over at my clock 6:17AM it read. I sighed; I could never sleep past seven and if I made it to seven that were a good day. I never really got it, I stayed up all last night, and I'd only gone to sleep at 3:46AM because I had to go to a family event today.
I scrambled out of my bed; my black Green Day t-shirt hung loosely off me and dropped to my knees. It wasn't that I was short it was the fact a family member hadn't realised I'd not grown in two years, making them get me a t shirt about three sizes too big. I usually just slept in it now. After showing no more signs of growing.
I tiptoed into the kitchen, yawning slightly, but not feeling tired at all. I don't know why I headed towards the kitchen first, it wasn't like I actually ate breakfast, I didn't eat that much anymore, but I just stayed the same weight which I was happy with, as I wasn't too thin but I wasn't fat. I shook my head violently as I tried to get the kitchen into focus, still not having woken up properly yet. As the kitchen came into focus, I grabbed a can of Cola, let's just put it this way. I COULDN'T live without Cola; it was one of the things that had got me through the hard things in life. Along with the other thing. Green Day.
They were the people I really thanked for getting me through every hard thing in my life, as well as making me realize something's I dreamed of were stupid, but I learned to live with that.
I drifted slowly and quietly back to my room. As soon as I entered my icy blue eyes connected with his gorgeous green eyes. It hit me rage the only word I could use to describe what was inside me. I felt the fire burn through me, as our eyes still connected, I don't know why I got so attached to the poster.
"Why did ya do this to me?" I asked him in a whisper as tears flooded to my eyes, the rage being replaced by pain and upset.
The usual silence came well it was only a poster.
"Why did ya have to hurt me so much?" I asked once more then again. "Why did ya have to change me into this stupid fucking bitch?"
It hit me again, the rage the anger but this time stronger the fire inside me bursting out, making me fly at the poster. I crashed into it making the fire continue to increase, I wanted to poke his gorgeous green eyes out on sticks and place them somewhere no one would ever find them, so that they could never look at me in the way they always did, disappointed as if I had done something wrong. I lay on the floor in silence were I had been thrown to after hitting the poster, the anger was dieing now just to be replaced by upset and a feeling of pain and loneliness. I had the loneliness feeling a lot I just never thought anyone ever cared about me; I just thought they all hated me. I suppose it was my fault I had told everyone to be honest with me not to lie to me, just tell me what they really thought about who I was. My icon on MSN after all was. 'I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I am not' this was 100% true, but just for once I wished someone liked me for who I was. The main reason was I was just too different for everyone else at my school; I went to a private one and hated it.
Everyone was really posh and spoke really well, proper English then there was me the outcast, the one who got all the nasty glares but the one that never got bullied, the one everyone was afraid of even if they wouldn't admit that they were. I had given people an equal share of nasty glares back though and I knew all the comments that went on behind my back, people hated the fact I wore spiked bracelets and wristbands, the fact I wore heavy eyeliner and dyed my hair black and occasionally threw in some coloured streaks. I hated my life but I lived for the music and the fact I knew one day something good would happen to me or at least I hoped.
I pushed myself up from the floor and crossed the floor, to my window it was still quite dark outside a few street lights on up and down the street, as I looked out of my window I saw a guy who looked around my age, looking back at me threw his window, there was one thing different about him, he looked like he was like me. The outcast the one who got the glares and comments behind his back. His hair was a cool shade of blue, as he smiled at me, my heart skipped a beat at once I knew I wanted to know that guy.
I scrambled out of my bed; my black Green Day t-shirt hung loosely off me and dropped to my knees. It wasn't that I was short it was the fact a family member hadn't realised I'd not grown in two years, making them get me a t shirt about three sizes too big. I usually just slept in it now. After showing no more signs of growing.
I tiptoed into the kitchen, yawning slightly, but not feeling tired at all. I don't know why I headed towards the kitchen first, it wasn't like I actually ate breakfast, I didn't eat that much anymore, but I just stayed the same weight which I was happy with, as I wasn't too thin but I wasn't fat. I shook my head violently as I tried to get the kitchen into focus, still not having woken up properly yet. As the kitchen came into focus, I grabbed a can of Cola, let's just put it this way. I COULDN'T live without Cola; it was one of the things that had got me through the hard things in life. Along with the other thing. Green Day.
They were the people I really thanked for getting me through every hard thing in my life, as well as making me realize something's I dreamed of were stupid, but I learned to live with that.
I drifted slowly and quietly back to my room. As soon as I entered my icy blue eyes connected with his gorgeous green eyes. It hit me rage the only word I could use to describe what was inside me. I felt the fire burn through me, as our eyes still connected, I don't know why I got so attached to the poster.
"Why did ya do this to me?" I asked him in a whisper as tears flooded to my eyes, the rage being replaced by pain and upset.
The usual silence came well it was only a poster.
"Why did ya have to hurt me so much?" I asked once more then again. "Why did ya have to change me into this stupid fucking bitch?"
It hit me again, the rage the anger but this time stronger the fire inside me bursting out, making me fly at the poster. I crashed into it making the fire continue to increase, I wanted to poke his gorgeous green eyes out on sticks and place them somewhere no one would ever find them, so that they could never look at me in the way they always did, disappointed as if I had done something wrong. I lay on the floor in silence were I had been thrown to after hitting the poster, the anger was dieing now just to be replaced by upset and a feeling of pain and loneliness. I had the loneliness feeling a lot I just never thought anyone ever cared about me; I just thought they all hated me. I suppose it was my fault I had told everyone to be honest with me not to lie to me, just tell me what they really thought about who I was. My icon on MSN after all was. 'I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I am not' this was 100% true, but just for once I wished someone liked me for who I was. The main reason was I was just too different for everyone else at my school; I went to a private one and hated it.
Everyone was really posh and spoke really well, proper English then there was me the outcast, the one who got all the nasty glares but the one that never got bullied, the one everyone was afraid of even if they wouldn't admit that they were. I had given people an equal share of nasty glares back though and I knew all the comments that went on behind my back, people hated the fact I wore spiked bracelets and wristbands, the fact I wore heavy eyeliner and dyed my hair black and occasionally threw in some coloured streaks. I hated my life but I lived for the music and the fact I knew one day something good would happen to me or at least I hoped.
I pushed myself up from the floor and crossed the floor, to my window it was still quite dark outside a few street lights on up and down the street, as I looked out of my window I saw a guy who looked around my age, looking back at me threw his window, there was one thing different about him, he looked like he was like me. The outcast the one who got the glares and comments behind his back. His hair was a cool shade of blue, as he smiled at me, my heart skipped a beat at once I knew I wanted to know that guy.
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