You wish you were AreYouDying?, Soda, or Spike., chapter 1

How well do you know GSB? Well you can't know it without knowing this kick ass three-way GSB married trio, yeah, three-way. They're pimp like that. They are the definition of cool. Oh yes, I said it. What are you going to do about it?
Why am I wasting my time writing a story, you ask? Because I can. And...Because I got bored. Anywho, I will teach you all about the awesomness of Spike, Kate, and Soda. Who knows, maybe you'll be slightly more awsomner after you read this!

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Let us begin with Spike. Spike owns your mom. Yup. She bought her on e-Bay last night for a penny. And she got alllll the money she used to buy your mom from selling kinky sex toys down by the local K-Mart and taking cash out of the pockets of the people who's blood she sucked. How hot is that?

When Spike was younger, she once bit everyone in her country. I bet you've never been cross-country bitting now have you? Yeah. You're not cool enough to do that. Sorry.

And when Spike was real little, she was bitten by the Green Day bug. It sent the obsesshobolobobajesusess gene throughout her body. For you stupid people out there, that is pernounced; obsess-hobo-lobo-ba-jesus-ess...I think...Well, it gave her an extreme case of O.C.G.D.D., or, Obssesive Compulsive Green Day Disorder. I'm sure you're all familiar with that? If you aren't, WHY ARE YOU HERE?

Okay so ahwile ago Spike joined GSB. From then on she made totally random journals that stole your hearts and made you want to stalk her!

*cough*HELLO, MY NAME IS ASSHOLE*cough*cough*

Hehe. Yeah, her stalker is also awesome. If she was there when they got engadged, I would SO be writing about her too right now...Where was I? Oh, months after her first time ever being a user on this site, our kick ass Spike fell in e-love with Kate and Soda.

They made out a few times and got engadged. It took awhile to get the wedding on the move, but the finally did and now they have been happily GSB married for over a month! Please, there is no need to be jealous, my friends...

***

Moving on to Kate. Now she's the one you see standing outside your window every night giving you the finger. In case you were wondering, she does it because you exsist. Maybe you should stop that, huh? It bugs her.

The Green Day bug tried to bite Kate, but she just cussed at it and beat the shit out of it until it ran away. Because of this, Tre Cool had to inject a concentrated amount of the obsesshobolobobajesusess gene into her body personally himself. He liked it. She liked it. It was all cool.

When Kate was a little girl, she owned all the ghetto people. Uh-huh. She had slaves.

JUST KIDDING.

But the ghetto fabulous people from...Texalhio...taught her everything she ever needed to know about talking 'black'. It is now literally qualified as her second language. See! Living in Texas, Alabama and Ohio at the same time does pay off!!

Kate joined GSB on March 9th of this year. None of you knew it then, but she had complete control over each and every one of you! Well, except for Dujo. Nobody controls Dujo...Someone should write a story for him. DO IT! Okay, getting off track here. Yes, Kate conrtoled everyone but Dujo and she STILL does. Even me. She makes us argue, makes us laugh, makes us cry, why? Because she can.

Kate met Soda when they were putting together the Anti-Earth Scum Assiociation, which, by the way, has helped in keeping the population of teenies, homophobes, preps, posers and many other annoying forms of Earth scum down thanks to the work of their plans and the undercover GSBians who persue them. Then they had a make-out party, where they met Spike, got engadged and later got married. Aww, how cuuute!

***

And finally, a girl that I personally have known for seven years, Soda. Soda is so wickedly awesome that even her own grandma asked for her autograph when she saw her in the mall one day hanging out with her friends. Hells yes. Wouldn't YOU like her autograph? It's okay to admit it. We all do.

Seven years ago, I came across Soda beating the living shit out of a fifth grade guy because he got sand on her shoe. She was in first grade then. I walked over to her and she punched me in the face. I punched her back. We've been bestest buddies ever since!

She stabbed the Green Day bug with a pencial the day she was shecudled to be given her dose the obsesslobohomogizness...Obsessivehomolobo...Obsses...that gene thing, so Green Day had to make a brand new bug and they told it to bite her when she fell asleep the next night. Her O.C.G.D.D. has gotten worse over the years, and I think they made it bite her a few more times just because she broke their old one.

You were blessed with her coming here a little over a year ago on May 5th, 2005. You may reconize her as a journal whore, and Josh will tell you, she makes one sexy real whore.

JOKING, JOKING.

Haha...Well, she was GSB love struck the day she started the AESA with Kate. I believe that was the same day the make-out party was held. The make-out party was hot hot hot, 'cause making out on the internet IS SO HAWT. That typing is just so sexy! And you know why it was sexy? Because it was Kate, Soda and Spike at the keyboard!!

I forgot to tell you that the engagement was almost called off the day of the wedding. Luckily, Spike was able to get back online and each one of them now has a piece of the lovely three part cermonie that was their GSB wedding in their journals.

***

Now, don't you feel at least one percent cooler than your loser self a few minutes ago? I thought so. GSB fame is a precious thing. Work hard, and maybe someday someone will write about you!




...Please note that you may not get any amount of the time you may have wasted during reading this story back...

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