The Hand Behind This Pen Relives A Failure EveryDay (everything has a dark side), chapter 3
I kept my eyes closed, silently listening to the sound of murmurings from overhead. The scent of the hospital anesthetic wings made me want to puke my guts up, but I still was quiet; for some unknown reason.
"Do you think she'll ever wake up?" an unknown person whispered.
"That's a good question, Billie... I don't know," Another voice trembled.
Billie? Who's that?
Someone must have gotten on the l'hôpital bed with me because, then, a larger weight than me made the cot sink a couple of centimeters. They rested their head on my shoulder, with their nose digging into my collar bone then sighed heavily. The hot air from his mouth sent tingles down my spine as he (it was obviously male) quietly whispered to me, "If I was a bit nicer, would I have had to come in the bathroom and get you? Would you have done this?" That person then lightly touched my hands with their index finger, stroking my bandaged wrist.
Who are you? Is it Moody Blue Pissy Pants? Wait..... Why am I here? I'm not supposed to be here! I'm supposed to be in heaven... Or hell... Not here...
I flickered my eyes open just a bit; enough so that I could peek at everyone, but they wouldn't see me. When I maneuvered my head so I would have a clear view of who was using me as a pillow, all I saw was a great big blue fur ball tickling my face, silently daring me to giggle... Or itch my chin.
Why are you touching me?!?!?... You smell sweaty...
His callused hands scratched my bare skin (well, the skin that wasn't covered with bandages) as he, again, sighed as though in great pain. Moody Blue Pissy Pants then got up, releasing the bed from his weight. "Billie" brushed the residue of leftover black eyeliner away from my eyes then gently, but still surprisingly, grazed his lips with mine.
My eyes flew open as he rushed from the room, followed by a very cunfuzzled Fireman.
Hmmmm...
***
"NO YOU"RE FUCKING NOT!"
What the hell?
"YOU ARE NOT GOING TO TURN OFF THE GODDAMN-"
"You're right, we're not." A random doctor calmly explained.
"Huh?... But I thought you were turning that little flippy thing a magigger off. You know, the one that MURDERS people when they don't wake up... "
What? Are they going to do that 'flip the machine off' thing to me? Wait..... I'm not even hooked to a machine!
"Billie boy, relax... It's okay, nothings going happen to her... Don't worry." Fireman evenly replied.
"You're right Mike, nothing is going to happen to her; I won't let anything happen to Abi."
"What's happened, Billie? Why are you acting like this? Why are you acting like you even know her... Well, you don't."
"I may not know her, but I know how she feels.... I know what it's like to lose a parent... I know what she feels like... I just know ."
"Billie, I know too, just remember, I lost 2 pairs... My real parents, and then after my parents, my adoptive parents. The ones who loved me, the ones who took care of me, after they got divorced, it wasn't the same, they weren't the same... They weren't the parents who loved me together. Now, it's like they're both empty shells, waiting to find their soul again, waiting for something to happen, Billie. I do know what she feels like."
'Billie' didn't reply, everyone was silent, except for Green Snot, who was asleep... And snoring like there was no tomorrow.
I decided to do something; the situation was getting terribly boring. I swung my legs out of the covers, yanking the needles, and wires from out of the crooks of my elbows, smiling inwardly at the effect my 'awakening' had on the 3 unalert men.
"Hi!"
So then, of course, Green Snot decides to wake up... Ruining everyone's look of astonishment by shouting out:
"Sleeping Beauty has ARISEN!"
"Ummm, listen... Can you guys leave for a minute?"
Everyone looked at me for a minute; unsure if they could trust me enough to leave for 5 minutes.
"...ummm...sure...yeah, guys, Doc., let's give her some time alone....."
They bought it. Are they all really that stupid? YOU DON'T LEAVE A SUICIDAL KID ALONE!
"Thank you," I breathed a sigh of relief, "I just need to have a little breather, y'know?
Idiots
"Bye now!, I'll be sure to call you when I'm ready for you to come back!"
Now, I will clean up what I started... I wish they didn't do that, but it doesn't matter now. No use getting attached to them, all of them, when my time's up... I'll miss them...
I cried, silently, for fear someone would get worried if they heard the soundless sobs ringing in the small room filled with needles, bags pumping blood into an unplugged arm.
Anyway, no one would even bother coming in here, they don't care. Still, I'm just going to leave noiselessly, lest anyone hear me.
I crawled out of the third story window, holding onto the sill.
Take a deep breath, Abi. You're not gunna fall, so don't worry... Hehe.
I let out a shriek as my foot slipped, leaving me hanging by my hands.
"FUCK! Ummm, hold on Abi, I'll get help," said a terrified Fireman.
"Okay, ummm..... Shit shit shit, ummm grab my hand.... Shit shit shit..... Damn it... Shit shit shit....", He rambled on and on, exercising his swearing vocabulary, even to the point of combining certain words, making newer, more vulgar words.
"No."
"What? Grab my god-fucking ARM!"
"No. Goodbye Fireman, Moody Blue Pissy Pants, Green Snot." I directed my words to the little group gathering at the window pane.
I scooted off the ledge and dropped, letting myself fall. I landed on my feet, like a cat.
Oh my God, I'm comparing myself to a cat ? Very strange...
I darted into the street, not bothering to 'look both ways' as my mother, in her spare time, had taught me. I heard a beeping noise, then glanced to my left, only to meet very bright car lights. And then it hit me, knocking me down. I closed my eyes for the last time, letting myself fall into a black void, the only noise was a fading "Noooooo... " coming from a third party...
The last thought that popped into my head was this:
My mission is done..... It's finally over...... Forever...
Another turning point,
A fork stuck in the road.
Time grabs you by the wrist,
Directs you where to go.
So make the best of this test,
And don't ask why.
It's not a question,
But a lesson learned in time,
It's something unpredictable,
But in the end is right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
So take the photographs
And still frames in your mind.
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time.
Tattoo's of memories,
And dead skin on trial.
For what it's worth,
It was worth all the while.
It's something unpredictable,
But in the end is right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
It's something unpredictable,
But in the end is right.
I hope you had the time of your life
It's something unpredictable,
But in the end is right.
I hope you had the time of your life...
The End.
"Do you think she'll ever wake up?" an unknown person whispered.
"That's a good question, Billie... I don't know," Another voice trembled.
Billie? Who's that?
Someone must have gotten on the l'hôpital bed with me because, then, a larger weight than me made the cot sink a couple of centimeters. They rested their head on my shoulder, with their nose digging into my collar bone then sighed heavily. The hot air from his mouth sent tingles down my spine as he (it was obviously male) quietly whispered to me, "If I was a bit nicer, would I have had to come in the bathroom and get you? Would you have done this?" That person then lightly touched my hands with their index finger, stroking my bandaged wrist.
Who are you? Is it Moody Blue Pissy Pants? Wait..... Why am I here? I'm not supposed to be here! I'm supposed to be in heaven... Or hell... Not here...
I flickered my eyes open just a bit; enough so that I could peek at everyone, but they wouldn't see me. When I maneuvered my head so I would have a clear view of who was using me as a pillow, all I saw was a great big blue fur ball tickling my face, silently daring me to giggle... Or itch my chin.
Why are you touching me?!?!?... You smell sweaty...
His callused hands scratched my bare skin (well, the skin that wasn't covered with bandages) as he, again, sighed as though in great pain. Moody Blue Pissy Pants then got up, releasing the bed from his weight. "Billie" brushed the residue of leftover black eyeliner away from my eyes then gently, but still surprisingly, grazed his lips with mine.
My eyes flew open as he rushed from the room, followed by a very cunfuzzled Fireman.
Hmmmm...
***
"NO YOU"RE FUCKING NOT!"
What the hell?
"YOU ARE NOT GOING TO TURN OFF THE GODDAMN-"
"You're right, we're not." A random doctor calmly explained.
"Huh?... But I thought you were turning that little flippy thing a magigger off. You know, the one that MURDERS people when they don't wake up... "
What? Are they going to do that 'flip the machine off' thing to me? Wait..... I'm not even hooked to a machine!
"Billie boy, relax... It's okay, nothings going happen to her... Don't worry." Fireman evenly replied.
"You're right Mike, nothing is going to happen to her; I won't let anything happen to Abi."
"What's happened, Billie? Why are you acting like this? Why are you acting like you even know her... Well, you don't."
"I may not know her, but I know how she feels.... I know what it's like to lose a parent... I know what she feels like... I just know ."
"Billie, I know too, just remember, I lost 2 pairs... My real parents, and then after my parents, my adoptive parents. The ones who loved me, the ones who took care of me, after they got divorced, it wasn't the same, they weren't the same... They weren't the parents who loved me together. Now, it's like they're both empty shells, waiting to find their soul again, waiting for something to happen, Billie. I do know what she feels like."
'Billie' didn't reply, everyone was silent, except for Green Snot, who was asleep... And snoring like there was no tomorrow.
I decided to do something; the situation was getting terribly boring. I swung my legs out of the covers, yanking the needles, and wires from out of the crooks of my elbows, smiling inwardly at the effect my 'awakening' had on the 3 unalert men.
"Hi!"
So then, of course, Green Snot decides to wake up... Ruining everyone's look of astonishment by shouting out:
"Sleeping Beauty has ARISEN!"
"Ummm, listen... Can you guys leave for a minute?"
Everyone looked at me for a minute; unsure if they could trust me enough to leave for 5 minutes.
"...ummm...sure...yeah, guys, Doc., let's give her some time alone....."
They bought it. Are they all really that stupid? YOU DON'T LEAVE A SUICIDAL KID ALONE!
"Thank you," I breathed a sigh of relief, "I just need to have a little breather, y'know?
Idiots
"Bye now!, I'll be sure to call you when I'm ready for you to come back!"
Now, I will clean up what I started... I wish they didn't do that, but it doesn't matter now. No use getting attached to them, all of them, when my time's up... I'll miss them...
I cried, silently, for fear someone would get worried if they heard the soundless sobs ringing in the small room filled with needles, bags pumping blood into an unplugged arm.
Anyway, no one would even bother coming in here, they don't care. Still, I'm just going to leave noiselessly, lest anyone hear me.
I crawled out of the third story window, holding onto the sill.
Take a deep breath, Abi. You're not gunna fall, so don't worry... Hehe.
I let out a shriek as my foot slipped, leaving me hanging by my hands.
"FUCK! Ummm, hold on Abi, I'll get help," said a terrified Fireman.
"Okay, ummm..... Shit shit shit, ummm grab my hand.... Shit shit shit..... Damn it... Shit shit shit....", He rambled on and on, exercising his swearing vocabulary, even to the point of combining certain words, making newer, more vulgar words.
"No."
"What? Grab my god-fucking ARM!"
"No. Goodbye Fireman, Moody Blue Pissy Pants, Green Snot." I directed my words to the little group gathering at the window pane.
I scooted off the ledge and dropped, letting myself fall. I landed on my feet, like a cat.
Oh my God, I'm comparing myself to a cat ? Very strange...
I darted into the street, not bothering to 'look both ways' as my mother, in her spare time, had taught me. I heard a beeping noise, then glanced to my left, only to meet very bright car lights. And then it hit me, knocking me down. I closed my eyes for the last time, letting myself fall into a black void, the only noise was a fading "Noooooo... " coming from a third party...
The last thought that popped into my head was this:
My mission is done..... It's finally over...... Forever...
Another turning point,
A fork stuck in the road.
Time grabs you by the wrist,
Directs you where to go.
So make the best of this test,
And don't ask why.
It's not a question,
But a lesson learned in time,
It's something unpredictable,
But in the end is right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
So take the photographs
And still frames in your mind.
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time.
Tattoo's of memories,
And dead skin on trial.
For what it's worth,
It was worth all the while.
It's something unpredictable,
But in the end is right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
It's something unpredictable,
But in the end is right.
I hope you had the time of your life
It's something unpredictable,
But in the end is right.
I hope you had the time of your life...
The End.
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