A Shocking Personality

Well I sit here at my computer with my head feeling like it is caving in; a wonderful side effect from my day's ECT session.

FOr those of you who don't know... let me explain what ECT really is.

(from above link)
A course of treatment with ECT usually consists of six to twelve treatments. Treatments are usually given three times a week for a month or less. The patient is given general anesthesia and a muscle relaxant. When these have taken full effect, the patient's brain is stimulated, using electrodes placed at precise locations on the patient's head, with a brief controlled series of electrical pulses. This stimulus causes a seizure within the brain, which lasts for approximately a minute. Because of the muscle relaxants and anesthesia, the patient's body does not convulse and the patient feels no pain. The patient awakens after five to ten minutes, much as he or she would from minor surgery.

I am having 10 sessions for 3 times a week and today was session number 2. I won't even mention the 1 1/2 hour drive time one way to the place.

The first sessions aftermath was bad... I short term memory was not really good (I forgot the actual walk into the hosp) but physically was HORRIBLE. My jaw was so strained that I could barely open my mouth enough to eat; which I HAD to do before I could even leave the hospital. I was nauseous to the extent that I had to have my mother pull over after about 30 minutes of beginning the drive home so I could throw up. My head was pounding so when I got home I took one of my husband's pain pills and slept for the rest of the night and day. By the next day I was fine.

Session two came and I told the doctors about what happened after the first session so they adjusted the meds they give me which worked somewhat since I had no memory loss but that headache and nauseous feeling hasn't left me at all. I didn't throw up on the trip home; though I did have Ron pull over and I dry heaved a number of times though we were closer to home this time.

I HATE how I feel after these sessions... HATE HATE HATE. The ONLY thing keeping me from not stopping is that I haven't had all the sessions and until I have them all it's all up in the air if it is going to work or not.

My next appt is this Monday and I am telling them point blank that they will do something about the headache/nausea or I am not having the treatment. PERIOD. I have a complete wasted day and I have too much to do to be able to waste a day.

The reason I have a lot to do is that after much family discussion we are selling the huge family house so we can downsize to something with one level. G-pa is turning 90 and his doctor finally said he doesn't like him doing stairs and that was the final deciding factor. This Wednesday ( a day I will have a session btw) is slated to be the first of many open houses. This one is just for the other agents in the office and I guess the pictures and whatnot will be taken for the advertising of the property.

Right now I am on overload... I am so overwhelmed and over bombarded that I am feeling NOTHING. I am not feeling happy for the sale or stressed or anything. Which is worrying my therapist at the moment.


I'm tired and I am ready for something; anything to give.
Posted on May 18th, 2007 at 11:02pm


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