Yesh, Im talking about periods.
I feel like venting more of my frustrations, so here I am again. Writing another blog that wont get read as much as I would like.
Anyway, Im going to tackle the issue of periods. And Im not talking about the dots you put at the end of a sentence. No, no. Im talking Menstruation- the tearing of the uterus wall, the release of unfertilized eggs. The blood that spills from the lips in our pants. The reason why us women can have babies.
My main thing is the hormonal imbalance it produces. In my case, I can get selectively pissy. Namely, Im a bitch to a selected group but can shake it off for another. That begins a good week or so before my Aunt Flow comes for a visit, and continues until its over.
I feel sorry for the people I have to work with. They could ask me a simple question like 'can I have a pen?' And I'll go into a chick fit, telling them that Im not Bic and I dont make pens, so they should go and look for one up thier asshole. But then I go home, and Im laughing and joking like theres nothing wrong.
The pain is another thing. God is obviously a man. I say that because why else would he put me through such literal back-breaking cramps? Seriously, for the first couple of days, it feels like someones trying to do Origami with my ovaries. If I sit one way, its cool, but it kicks in again and then I have to move. That sucks, so does the nausea. The hot water bottle theory doesnt work that well- your legs still feel like jelly and you walk like you have a shitty diaper on, or worse yet.... you walk like your old and decrepit.
So you pop a few painkillers, that works, but you still have to wait for the little fuckers to kick in. You may as well not bother.
Then theres the sanitary towels or tampon debate.
I use both. Cos Im cool like that. But also because 'Tampons give you freedom to do all those everyday things'. Dunno what random bullshitting t.v ad I quoted there, but there was truth in it. Shoving a ginormous cotton bud up your vageta isnt the most pleasant experience, but meh. What can we do? Its either that or wearing a huge nappy with wings.
And what in God's name is that about? Theres so fucking many to choose from! You got wings, night time, day time, super, maxi, regular, thong shaped, no wings, black ones (when you wear black clothes), thick ones, thin ones, perfumed ones, non perfumed.... All we want is something to stop the spillage! Its not a time to dress our minge in the latest fashions!
Just another way for companies to make money off of womens misfortunes. That and moustache bleaching kits. That's just cruel, that is.
Think about it. Back in BP (Before Pantyliners), what did women do? Im curious. But then again, no. Im greatful for the advances in cosmetics. Simply because we dont have to walk around looking like Chewbacca from Star Wars.
So Im done rambling. Obviously I was surfing the crimson wave and a man pissed me off when I wrote this. Why did a man piss me off? I have no fucking idea. He just did. Im going to eat some chocolate.
Anyway, Im going to tackle the issue of periods. And Im not talking about the dots you put at the end of a sentence. No, no. Im talking Menstruation- the tearing of the uterus wall, the release of unfertilized eggs. The blood that spills from the lips in our pants. The reason why us women can have babies.
My main thing is the hormonal imbalance it produces. In my case, I can get selectively pissy. Namely, Im a bitch to a selected group but can shake it off for another. That begins a good week or so before my Aunt Flow comes for a visit, and continues until its over.
I feel sorry for the people I have to work with. They could ask me a simple question like 'can I have a pen?' And I'll go into a chick fit, telling them that Im not Bic and I dont make pens, so they should go and look for one up thier asshole. But then I go home, and Im laughing and joking like theres nothing wrong.
The pain is another thing. God is obviously a man. I say that because why else would he put me through such literal back-breaking cramps? Seriously, for the first couple of days, it feels like someones trying to do Origami with my ovaries. If I sit one way, its cool, but it kicks in again and then I have to move. That sucks, so does the nausea. The hot water bottle theory doesnt work that well- your legs still feel like jelly and you walk like you have a shitty diaper on, or worse yet.... you walk like your old and decrepit.
So you pop a few painkillers, that works, but you still have to wait for the little fuckers to kick in. You may as well not bother.
Then theres the sanitary towels or tampon debate.
I use both. Cos Im cool like that. But also because 'Tampons give you freedom to do all those everyday things'. Dunno what random bullshitting t.v ad I quoted there, but there was truth in it. Shoving a ginormous cotton bud up your vageta isnt the most pleasant experience, but meh. What can we do? Its either that or wearing a huge nappy with wings.
And what in God's name is that about? Theres so fucking many to choose from! You got wings, night time, day time, super, maxi, regular, thong shaped, no wings, black ones (when you wear black clothes), thick ones, thin ones, perfumed ones, non perfumed.... All we want is something to stop the spillage! Its not a time to dress our minge in the latest fashions!
Just another way for companies to make money off of womens misfortunes. That and moustache bleaching kits. That's just cruel, that is.
Think about it. Back in BP (Before Pantyliners), what did women do? Im curious. But then again, no. Im greatful for the advances in cosmetics. Simply because we dont have to walk around looking like Chewbacca from Star Wars.
So Im done rambling. Obviously I was surfing the crimson wave and a man pissed me off when I wrote this. Why did a man piss me off? I have no fucking idea. He just did. Im going to eat some chocolate.
Comments
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Oh oh, you should buy a menstrual cup.
I don't really have more mood swings than I normally have. I just hate the dingy feeling so much. And I hate it that I feel disgusting and dirty and swallen o.O
princess consuela, June 12th, 2008 at 04:20:45pm
i hate them ._. but you gotta live with it until you are halfway or so into your life then you are free again!!!
Sarah!, May 7th, 2007 at 11:40:47am
Yeah I hate them but luckily I have an irraguler period so I only get mine ever 3-6 months. I use tampons because like Love said...I don't like sitting in my own blood
Jessika with a K, May 1st, 2007 at 06:25:16pm
Unfortunately it's so true!
Wow, I've got the same problem with the b*tching at select people... then being fine with others. And those damn men...
Sadytha, February 15th, 2007 at 09:32:11pm
I forgot about my pain.....when I read that ...its SOOO true
and I want chocolate too.
I never eat chocolate...*calls mummy*
asdfghjkl;', February 12th, 2007 at 11:37:15am
Lmao. Everything you said in this blog is oh so true.
Stupid time of the monthliness. D:
Maybe there'll be some weird, zany form of technology in the future which means we don't have to have them, but can still make babies.
Wouldn't that be nice. =]
The Brightside., February 9th, 2007 at 02:44:40am
lmfao you're my new hero :D
You tell it how it is. I get pissed off at my friends then 10 minutes later I'm laughing like there's nothing wrong. Oh, and there's also the fights you have with your parents when it's that time of the month, or just before. You get so pissed off at the slightest things at them.
dramamine;, February 8th, 2007 at 02:44:31am
haha
The Hippy, February 7th, 2007 at 06:09:30pm
well, my name certainly doesn't do justice to this blog..XD
*watch.me.bleed*, February 7th, 2007 at 03:06:57pm
I love you for posting this. xD
Srsly, CLARITY HERE.
davey jones., February 6th, 2007 at 08:57:56pm
I feel the same way when I get mine. I get so b*tchy, and I get the worst cramps. I hate when I get the really really bad cramps, and I can't go on with my day, and I have to leave school early.
Oh. And I heard that in the old days, they used old rags.
racshmaiwionaise., February 6th, 2007 at 08:12:53pm
Lmfao. This is hilarious and so true.
f*ck. Men have it easy. I didn't go to school today cause of f*cking cramps. I'm scared to b*tch my head off at everyone and everything. XD Ah.
Hello, My Name Is Asshole, February 6th, 2007 at 06:16:02pm
This made me laugh so hard, don't take that the wrong way.
Kurtni, February 6th, 2007 at 05:44:43pm
I hope that every male in MANkind is reading this. Then they'd know what we have to suffer through once a month. What do THEY get? Boners are probably nothing compared to this.
In all honesty, I don't have a bad one. I never get nausea or cramps, but whenever I'm doing softball conditioning and it's that time of the month, then I do. Awful timing, huh? Oh yeah, mine hardly even lasts 8 days. It's really bad for the first and second days, but from 3rd on it's like... nothing... The only bad part about mine is that it's never consistent, I'll start on the 1st of the month one time, and the next month it'll be on the 20th. =/
Funky Platypus, February 6th, 2007 at 02:45:27pm
Yeah. I feel like I'm going to puke for three days. Awful. Lmfao, nappy with wings. It really is just that. My mom refuses to have anything to do with tampons. I mean, really. I had a swimming lesson I had to quit cuz she was like "No. End of story." when I asked if I could just wear a tampon and go. Jeez.
And before pads, people used cloth. I'm serious. They just used cloth. Washable cloth.
lyrical_mess, February 6th, 2007 at 01:42:36pm