Pointlessness

Well, it's almost 2, and I'm bored out of my mind. Why does it not surprise me that I want to cry? These feelings happen so often anymore, that I'm starting to get used to them. I feel like hiding in a corner and crying my eyes out. Then again, I always feel this way, so it's not too surprising. I'm fucking tired of all the crap. As you may have seen in my blogs that I posted today. Not that anyone reads them. By the way 10005706, is date and time.. If you want to know more ask, I may tell you, may not, Who knows. Who cares. It's not too hard to figure out if you know where to put the colon and the backslashes.

You see, what I don't understand, is how I can be surrounded by so many different people, and still feel all alone. There's only two or three people that I trust anymore, and you know who you are.. Not many people that I meet I truely care for. There's maybe three or four people I've met, whether it be online or in person, that I really care for. There's so many people I know that couldn't careless if I continued breathing or not. There so many people I know that don't even notice when I'm not there. There's so many people that I know that have left me, after finding out what's wrong, and what I think about. Trust me, if you knew, you'd probably leave to. My best friend is my thirty year old cousin. He's the greatest guy you'll ever meet, and I'm so greatful to have him around. He's the most amazing friend. He's always there, and though he tends to pick on me a lot, he's still a sweetheart. I love him with all my heart, and I would do anything for him. Which is way more than I've ever given to someone. There are so many jerks out there, it's awesome when you find someone who isn't. I love you Jeremy. More than you'll ever know. You're my best friend. And always will be.

I'm tired of being afraid to go home, in fear of what kind of crap my stepdad will be yelling about. I'm tired of worrying about whether or not they'll fight tonight. I understand you have your problems, I just wish you'd handle them more maturly. Jesus Christ.

Well, I should probably shut up now, before I start to cry.