We'll wish this never ends.
“I missed you.”
You whisper those words into my ear softly, hugging me tighter than ever, without even giving me time to reply. My face buried in your chest (why do you have to be so much taller than me?), I smile and nod, unable to do anything else to let you know the feeling is mutual; but I know you can read in my mind exactly how much I missed you. I close my eyes and breathe in slowly, letting your scent invade my lungs. I know it so well I could recognize it amongst million of others, that scent of cigarettes, sweat and something sweet I’ve never been able to identify. It makes me feel safe, like nothing in the world can hurt me if I just stay with you. You slowly run your hand up and down my back, holding me closer for a few moments before I run out of breath and have to pull out from the hug. We look at each other and smile, it’s been so long since the last time we met that we have to get used to seeing each other again.
“You look beautiful today”, you say smiling. I grin and look you in the eyes, those eyes of such a rare colour, but incredibly similar to mine. I raise my eyebrows jokingly, asking “Just today?” You start laughing, and as my heart skips a beat I realize how much I’ve missed that laughter, the way your eyes shine when you’re happy, the way you slightly tilt your head to the right every time you laugh. You start running your hand through my hair, messing it up badly, but I don’t care about how I look when I’m with you. “You stupid thing, no, not just today. I meant like, more beautiful than ever…” I smile, knowing that you’re confused and it’s because of something I said; I’m the only one who manages to make you feel stupid, you told me ages ago and I’m actually surprised I remember it. You take my hand and lead me to the couch, we sit down, still holding hands, and I rest my head on your shoulder, closing my eyes and feeling complete again, with you, after all this time.
I could stay like this for the rest of my life.
We sit in silence, listening to each other breathe, and looking out from the open window. There’s a radio playing in the distance, the music coming in from the window, but it’s too far to recognize the song, all I know is that it sounds slightly familiar to me. The cool breeze makes me shiver and I curl up against your side, just wanting, needing to be close to you. You look at me smiling, and kiss my forehead, always looking me in the eyes. I smile back and distractedly play with your hair. In a movie, this would be the perfect moment for a kiss and I’m actually hoping for it, but I know this isn’t a movie. Suddenly, the music becomes louder and I can perfectly hear what the singer’s saying. Cause the hardest part of this is leaving you. This brings tears to my eyes. I don’t want to leave you, I don’t want you to leave me. I just want me and you to be like this forever, I want everybody to forget about our existence so we can spend the rest of our life hiding here, just being together. I know from the way you tell me not to cry that you will leave me very soon, and it just makes me cry more. You kiss my eyes gently, wiping the tears away with your lips.
When I wake up, I realize the tears were the only real thing.
This is what happens when mom makes me turn off the computer at midnight. I sleep. And dream.
Okay so don't ask who the ~other person~ is, cause I really don't know. I think it's like a mixture of everyone I've ever ~loved~ in my short life. I'm not even sure about this mysterious characher's gender. wtf @ me.
Thanks for reading.
Oh and btw this is my first ~serious~ composition in English, so please let me know what you think about it?
You whisper those words into my ear softly, hugging me tighter than ever, without even giving me time to reply. My face buried in your chest (why do you have to be so much taller than me?), I smile and nod, unable to do anything else to let you know the feeling is mutual; but I know you can read in my mind exactly how much I missed you. I close my eyes and breathe in slowly, letting your scent invade my lungs. I know it so well I could recognize it amongst million of others, that scent of cigarettes, sweat and something sweet I’ve never been able to identify. It makes me feel safe, like nothing in the world can hurt me if I just stay with you. You slowly run your hand up and down my back, holding me closer for a few moments before I run out of breath and have to pull out from the hug. We look at each other and smile, it’s been so long since the last time we met that we have to get used to seeing each other again.
“You look beautiful today”, you say smiling. I grin and look you in the eyes, those eyes of such a rare colour, but incredibly similar to mine. I raise my eyebrows jokingly, asking “Just today?” You start laughing, and as my heart skips a beat I realize how much I’ve missed that laughter, the way your eyes shine when you’re happy, the way you slightly tilt your head to the right every time you laugh. You start running your hand through my hair, messing it up badly, but I don’t care about how I look when I’m with you. “You stupid thing, no, not just today. I meant like, more beautiful than ever…” I smile, knowing that you’re confused and it’s because of something I said; I’m the only one who manages to make you feel stupid, you told me ages ago and I’m actually surprised I remember it. You take my hand and lead me to the couch, we sit down, still holding hands, and I rest my head on your shoulder, closing my eyes and feeling complete again, with you, after all this time.
I could stay like this for the rest of my life.
We sit in silence, listening to each other breathe, and looking out from the open window. There’s a radio playing in the distance, the music coming in from the window, but it’s too far to recognize the song, all I know is that it sounds slightly familiar to me. The cool breeze makes me shiver and I curl up against your side, just wanting, needing to be close to you. You look at me smiling, and kiss my forehead, always looking me in the eyes. I smile back and distractedly play with your hair. In a movie, this would be the perfect moment for a kiss and I’m actually hoping for it, but I know this isn’t a movie. Suddenly, the music becomes louder and I can perfectly hear what the singer’s saying. Cause the hardest part of this is leaving you. This brings tears to my eyes. I don’t want to leave you, I don’t want you to leave me. I just want me and you to be like this forever, I want everybody to forget about our existence so we can spend the rest of our life hiding here, just being together. I know from the way you tell me not to cry that you will leave me very soon, and it just makes me cry more. You kiss my eyes gently, wiping the tears away with your lips.
When I wake up, I realize the tears were the only real thing.
This is what happens when mom makes me turn off the computer at midnight. I sleep. And dream.
Okay so don't ask who the ~other person~ is, cause I really don't know. I think it's like a mixture of everyone I've ever ~loved~ in my short life. I'm not even sure about this mysterious characher's gender. wtf @ me.
Thanks for reading.
Oh and btw this is my first ~serious~ composition in English, so please let me know what you think about it?
Comments
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this is f*cking amazing, 'nuff said.
Trusty Chords., May 20th, 2009 at 09:42:05am
that totally just made me cry.
you are one of my favorite writers on here, for sure.
this is one of the most beautiful blogs i've ever read. (:
<3
dancepaigeydance;, November 21st, 2008 at 12:31:27am
That was intense, like something you'd read from a romantic novel, some of the best english I have ever read.
Congrats El.
---
I hate having dreams about something deep and meaningful about someone but you can't seem to figure out who it is.
:\
Yeah thats me..., September 14th, 2008 at 10:05:03pm
this is amazing...
suburban.zombie, August 30th, 2008 at 04:20:46pm
That's so beautiful
*hugs*
TO BE DELETED, August 29th, 2008 at 01:32:49pm
This is nice. I like how it's a dream.
Skippy., August 29th, 2008 at 02:55:01am
wow. that gave me shivers.
it's so beautiful, but so sad. I love it < 3
Bubble Wrap., August 28th, 2008 at 05:25:07pm
woah D:
its like, as if it were like, ..
like, im kind of in a situation where that would be a very possible moment some time in the near future of my life because of the situation im in now.
D:
POONTANG, August 28th, 2008 at 03:39:36pm
When I wake up, I realize the tears were the only real thing.
That is truly amazing. I have dreams like that and I always feel sad when I wake up knowing in fact the tears were the only real thing. I love this blog tbh.
Sunshine., August 28th, 2008 at 03:38:03pm
omg
my dreams are like this.
except I know who the person is,
and when I wake up I feel like crap but really happy at the same time.
I love this blog.
hollywood tragedy., August 27th, 2008 at 08:00:56pm
Omfg D:
-insert shocked face here-
captain america, August 27th, 2008 at 06:12:28pm
Crap that was amazing!
Very tear jerking, but amazing. :D
threeam., August 27th, 2008 at 04:46:03pm
wow. i think best blog i've ever read.
princess consuela, August 27th, 2008 at 03:28:50pm
I thought this was exceedingly beautiful, El. The way you write... and you say that your english is bad? OMG you are on crack.lol ive had a dream like that, but i couldnt remember mine almost at all. thats sweet though. really. you should really keep writing.
Pretty Rave Girl, August 27th, 2008 at 12:34:57pm
this was beautiful.
and I know exactly what you mean in the italic part.
loved it.
:]
Lissie!, August 27th, 2008 at 12:03:01pm