shutter, sigh, relief!

the shutter.

my love life sucks right now. it's drier than a burnt piece of toast and no matter how much butter i put on it, it just gets drier and drier.
i asked one of my really good friends out and he didnt give me an answer and my best friend tiffani is harassing me about getting one.
but i don't really know if i want one.
i'm afraid that after we breakup we won't be friends anymore, and losing him would kill me inside.

the sigh.

my friend mikayla is, how can i this nicely..., clingy.
she's always texting me in the morning, asking me what to wear to school and all.
today we had an in-school basketball game testing the skills of the new players and she's whispered to me, "don't ignore me."
i think she doesn't know how to live, personally, she's a straight A student (not knocking it), and when i try and tell her that a B isn't the end of the world she's gets distressed like i just told her to cut off her own foot and it's wearing on me.
she also talks about people behind their backs too, she was having about, three people over, tiffani, mikayla b., and i, she just out of nowhere whispers, "tiffani stays by herself too much."
now, my friend tiffani isn't the most responsible or stable person ever but that's why she's amazing. she has more than half a brain like some people. but the day tiffani makes something other than a small fire and a mess in the kitchen is the day she can't stay alone.

my family is going an extremely rough finanical patch.
well, it's more like driving on a road made of ice.
we don't really buy anything anymore and i don't even attempt to ask for anything over twenty dollars anymore.


this year is almost over.
granted, it's not as emotionally stressful and overbearing like the last but it wasn't a breeze like i know 2009 will be. it has too, because i've started to realize my best years are always multiples of three.
i may be granted a lover, or atleast a boyfriend. maybe some new friends, because people always move to here when it's cold so we get a few new students.
over christmas break i may be able to go and live with my cousin and tiffani in a flat in williamsburg new york.

i feel so much better, getting all of that off my chest.

EDIT: i could care less about my life now that i think about it.
there's no one out there for me.
i'm better off alone.
Posted on November 21st, 2008 at 03:30am


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