Ask Armstrong!

AuthorMessage
lyrical_mess
Falling In Love With The Board
lyrical_mess
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 5278

Mibba Blog
November 21st, 2006 at 05:15am
Dear Biggest Fan,

Stop being a dumbass and clogging up message boards. The teenie thing isn't funny anymore, so get over it.

And recording the album was fun, thanks for asking.

Love,

Bay-Jay

____________________________

Dear Billie Joe,

I am so, so, so nervous about exams! I have prefinals in ten days and I just can't bring myself to study! See? I'm online asking you a question instead of studying!!!!! I need tips!!!!! HELP MEEEEEE!!!!

From,
Spazzy
One Nut Wonder
Geek
One Nut Wonder
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 304

Mibba
November 22nd, 2006 at 10:24pm
Dear Spazzy,
You should get your ass off the net and get to studying. If you even tempt yourself to do something else you should give yourself a punishment, like no Green Day for a week. See that would make me study because I won't let me be with my band. I'm seriously confusing myself so I should just go.
Hope you do well in your exams.
Best Wishes,
Billie Joe.
-------
Dear Beeje,
I'm having issues at my school. You see, I'm bisexual. I told my friends my little secret and I trusted her not to tell. Well, some how my secret leaked all over the school and all signs point to her as the culprit. She keeps telling me over and over that she didn't say anything. Should I believe her?
Sincerely,
Confused Bisexual
I.Heart.Panic.
King For A Couple Of Days
I.Heart.Panic.
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 2019
November 24th, 2006 at 12:27pm
Dear Billie

Don't you think cheese is strange? I mean I'm not that big on sliced cheese, but I adore melted cheese. Uh-huh.

Jess x
One Nut Wonder
Geek
One Nut Wonder
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 304

Mibba
November 24th, 2006 at 12:32pm
Waiting <3:
Dear Billie

Don't you think cheese is strange? I mean I'm not that big on sliced cheese, but I adore melted cheese. Uh-huh.

Jess x

ummm... you didn't answer my question...
--------
Dear Jess,
I don't think it's strange. I think it's disgusting. I never liked eating it, but I do nonetheless.
Love,
Beeje.
-----
(since no one answered this)
Dear Beeje,
I'm having issues at my school. You see, I'm bisexual. I told my friends my little secret and I trusted her not to tell. Well, some how my secret leaked all over the school and all signs point to her as the culprit. She keeps telling me over and over that she didn't say anything. Should I believe her?
Sincerely,
Confused Bisexual
lyrical_mess
Falling In Love With The Board
lyrical_mess
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 5278

Mibba Blog
November 25th, 2006 at 02:41am
Dear Confused,

Innocent until proven guilty. If you trusted her enough to tell her your secret, then you should trust her now until its actually proven that she told someone else. If you can trust her enough to confide in her, then trust that she's telling the truth. If it turns out she's a traitor, whack 'er. If you find out she's really truly guilty...anything goes. Wait for that moment and hope it never comes.

Bisexually yours,
Billie Joe.


---------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Billie Joe,

I've become to obsessed! Whenever I tre, I mean TRY to tre--crap, I mean talk, I cool, I mean, KEEP saying TRE COOL. Tre AH I GIVE UP!

I cool, no, CAN'T say anytre (anything) other than TRE or COOL.

HELP MEEEEEEE

Sincerely,
Tresessed.
vivalarorya
Falling In Love With The Board
vivalarorya
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 8405
November 25th, 2006 at 09:22am
Dear Tresessed,
TRE? Why are you asking ME this??? Why TRE? My God, woman.
-BJ
Although I think I know where you're coming from.

-----------------

Dear Billie,
There's a senior in my art class with a girlfriend, but I happen to be in love with him. For a while he was flirting with me and saying stuff that insinuated that we were, you know, seeing each other, but he's been doing it less and less over the past week or so and I hate it. Helppppppp.
Love,
Obsessive
One Nut Wonder
Geek
One Nut Wonder
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 304

Mibba
November 25th, 2006 at 02:44pm
Dear Obsessive,
I can't really do anything. If he already had a girlfriend then it wasn't meant to be. But if he insisted on flirting with you then it possibly means that some of feelings you have for him are mutual. Just wait and maybe he'll come to you.
Love,
BJA
------
Dear Billie,
I'm afraid I have no friends. They all quit hanging out with me after I reached my Green Day phase. To get my friends back should I quit liking Green Day or should I find new friends? Help me please.
Sincerely,
Friendless
Hipster.
Falling In Love With The Board
Hipster.
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 6700

Mibba Blog
November 25th, 2006 at 03:25pm
One Nut Wonder:
Dear Obsessive,
I can't really do anything. If he already had a girlfriend then it wasn't meant to be. But if he insisted on flirting with you then it possibly means that some of feelings you have for him are mutual. Just wait and maybe he'll come to you.
Love,
BJA
------
Dear Billie,
I'm afraid I have no friends. They all quit hanging out with me after I reached my Green Day phase. To get my friends back should I quit liking Green Day or should I find new friends? Help me please.
Sincerely,
Friendless

Dear Friendless,

Whatever "friends" ditched you because of my band, aren't friends at all. You don't need them.
Find new ones, and be happy with them.

BJ
-x-x-x-x-
Dear BJ,
WHERE DO YOU GET YOUR HAIR CUT????

It pwns.

Love,
Lee.
Milk
King For A Couple Of Days
Milk
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 3741

Mibba Blog
November 26th, 2006 at 12:24am
Dear Lee
I do it myself... when I'm half awake.
Cool
Love BJ
----------------
Dear Billie Joe
Do you enjoy sodomy?
Love Curious
Lissie!
Falling In Love With The Board
Lissie!
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 7305

Blog
November 26th, 2006 at 04:27am
Dear Curious,
It all depends on how much coffee I've had during the day.
Love, Billie Joe.

---

Dear Billie Joe.
There's this site called geekstinkbreath, also known as GSB.
I've been addicted to it for a long ass time, almost a year, and I don't know what to do. It's taking over my life.
What shall I do?

Love,
Lissie. :]
Hipster.
Falling In Love With The Board
Hipster.
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 6700

Mibba Blog
November 26th, 2006 at 12:29pm
Lissie!:
Dear Curious,
It all depends on how much coffee I've had during the day.
Love, Billie Joe.

---

Dear Billie Joe.
There's this site called geekstinkbreath, also known as GSB.
I've been addicted to it for a long ass time, almost a year, and I don't know what to do. It's taking over my life.
What shall I do?

Love,
Lissie. :]

Dear Lissie,

Well, DON'T DO ANYTHING. GSB is an awesome website. I frequently visit and read your little message boards. ~~

BeeJee

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
Dear Billie,

I know that you have your own series of guitars through Fender, but would you ever think of putting out a series of copies of Blue?

Leester
lyrical_mess
Falling In Love With The Board
lyrical_mess
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 5278

Mibba Blog
November 26th, 2006 at 08:47pm
Dear Leester,

Listen, kid, I'm assuming you know some stuff about me, so I'm assuming you know how special Blue is. It's one of a kind (well, two) and it's a sweet and long memory. That can't be copied. The only reason the Billie Joe Les Pauls/ Fenders exist is because they sound nice and are easy to play on. Don't try to take my memory by making copies and selling them. It can't be done. Hand

Yours fakely,
Billie J.
lyrical_mess
Falling In Love With The Board
lyrical_mess
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 5278

Mibba Blog
November 26th, 2006 at 08:48pm
Dear Armstrong,

I lost my scruncie. I can't tie up my hair now. What should I do?

From,

Hair-knock life.
wish_i_was_adie
Jackass
wish_i_was_adie
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 1092

Mibba
November 26th, 2006 at 09:06pm
lyrical_gaah52:
Dear Armstrong,

I lost my scruncie. I can't tie up my hair now. What should I do?

From,

Hair-knock life.


Dear Hair-knock life,

You should gel your hair into a Mohawk. That way, you won't need a scrunchie ever again.

-Billie


Dear Billie Joe,

Do you ever check out Green Day fan websites?

From,
I'mEatingCheese
lyrical_mess
Falling In Love With The Board
lyrical_mess
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 5278

Mibba Blog
November 27th, 2006 at 05:07am
Dear I'mEatingCheese,

No. I don't. I hate my fans and I hate slash. I hate myself. *sob* k, I'm gonna go cut myself now. Bye.

From,
Emo-Joe.
lyrical_mess
Falling In Love With The Board
lyrical_mess
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 5278

Mibba Blog
November 27th, 2006 at 05:09am
lyrical_gaah52:
Dear I'mEatingCheese,

No. I don't. I hate my fans and I hate slash. I hate myself. *sob* k, I'm gonna go cut myself now. Bye.

From,
Emo-Joe.



Dear I'mEatingCheese,

I DID NOT WRITE THAT!!!! Emo-Joe is an imposter! Someone take away his blade before the kid hurts himself!

Anyway, yes, sometimes I do. It's fun to see fansites every now and then.

Keep adoring me,
Billie Joe.

---------------------------------------

Dear Billie Joe,

For a few months now, I have found that I am sexually attracted to apple pie. What is the significance of this?

Yours truly,
I'm Bringin' Sexy Pie!
Lissie!
Falling In Love With The Board
Lissie!
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 7305

Blog
November 27th, 2006 at 08:45am
Dear I'm Bringin' Sexy Pie.
Talk to a tattooist.
I don't know.
Mr. Green

Love, Billie Joe.

--

Dear Billie Joe.
I've met a guy who likes a girl who has a creepy boyfriend who actually likes another girl, who likes a girl, who likes another girl, who likes a boy and this boy's girlfriend's brother likes me and I don't know what to do.
I mean, I don't like him and he stalks me anywhere I go.

Yours truly,
Dumb.
vivalarorya
Falling In Love With The Board
vivalarorya
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 8405
November 27th, 2006 at 10:44am
Dear Dumb,
You lost me at "I've met a guy."
Yours,
BJ
-------------
Dear Billie,
There's a girl I know and I really don't like her that much but she seems to like me [AS A FRIEND! Jeez.] but I don't know what to do because I'm too nice to tell her she bugs me. So. Any advice?
Love,
Stuck
lyrical_mess
Falling In Love With The Board
lyrical_mess
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 5278

Mibba Blog
November 27th, 2006 at 12:24pm
Dear Stuck,

No...not really. Wink What you want to do is find a poem or song that relates to "backing off" or whatever and make sure the girl sees it. Y'know, burn her a CD with only that song or slip her a note with the lyrics on it. I'd tell you to try F.O.D, but that sounds a little extreme for your case.

Your American Genius,
Billie Jean at my door...

gotcha. It's Billie Joe and don't you forget it!
lyrical_mess
Falling In Love With The Board
lyrical_mess
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 5278

Mibba Blog
November 27th, 2006 at 12:26pm
Dear Billie Jean, I mean Joe,

My dog thinks his name is No. Everytime I say "No." he just looks at me and then goes back to chewing on the tampons. Do you know any good dog training schools?

Love,
Lil Bow-withouttampons
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