again. it allways happens to me.

i really shouldnt put this as a GSB blog, but im gonna anyway.

coz i dont really know who to talk to about it. my best frend would just hug me coz im sad. i dont think she even cares why im sad, just so long as im not.

well.. it happend again. i lost someone i cared about. no, they didnt move or get altheimers. they grew out of the place im in.

i really care about her. shes fantastic. she makes me smile, she makes me never want to hurt myself again. she laughs at my shitty jokes, shes genuinely funny. shes amazing and shes gonna be so great.

but i only know her online so when i say ily i dont think she takes it seriously. my sister would tell me im being silly and shes probably really a paedo. but shes not forward, shes never said lets meet up, or asked for my phone number...

i cant do anything, theres distance, theres that for all she knows im a paedo. and theres that i dont think she likes me. if she ever really did.

i used to think so... but i think shes grown out of where i am. shes got more sophisticated dreams, listens to heavier music... i think shes moved on from the whole random silly childish happy-music thing that im in. and so shes grown out of liking me maybe... if she ever did. like i said, for all she know im some paedo... its so weird, if you dont know whos a paedo, two paedos could meet each other and be like oh noes!

anyway, that was a bit off topic... the really sad thing is shes younger than me... and shes mentally older than me =[
i really shouldnt post this, this could be the dumbest thing i ever do... well nearly.

*writes tags* okay... *takes a deep breath and clicks submit*
Posted on May 25th, 2007 at 05:55am

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