The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Okay, I'd like to add some author's notes before I start. Yes, this is a blog about the Sweeney Todd movie. Yes, the one that came out two years ago, the Johnny Depp one. Yes, I am aware that it came out to years ago. No, I don't care because I just saw it today (or tonight, rather). Yes, this is a review. This review will contain the good, the bad, criticism, compliments, life, death... pretty much anything. It may be a tad lengthy. WARNING: Contains spoilers. Lots of 'em.

What's this movie about?
The movie, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street, is about a man named Benjamin Barker. Benjamin is a barber with a "beautiful, virtuous wife." They also have a daughter. But the "Honourable Judge Turpin" is jealous of Mr. Barker. So Ol' Judgey has Ben taken to court and sent to a labor camp in Australia. Many years later, Benjamin comes back to London under the alias of Sweeney Todd to seek out his wife, daughter, and revenge. He goes to Mrs. Lovett's Pie Shop, located underneath his old residence. She recognizes him at once and tells him the story of how Judge Turpin raped his wife at a masqeruade ball and everyone laughed at her. Later on after this incident she poisions herself and Sweeney's daughter becomes Turpin's ward. Sweeney is outraged and sets up shop in his old residence, killing many people. He and Mrs. Lovett get the idea that, with the price of meat being as high as it is and them having no other means of getting rid of the bodies, they should cook the human remains to make her pies, which become world famous. Sweeney kills a competing barber who threatens to reveal him as Benjamin Barker. (in 1800's London in a "lifer" was caught back in London he would be sentenced to death) The man Sweeney travelled with has his eyes set on Sweeney's daughter, and the Judge has her locked away in an asylum after he lears of the young sailor's intentions to take her away. The sailor helps her escape disguised as a man. Sweeney kills a begger woman who claims to know him, then kills the judge. He goes down to the basement nad realizes that the beggar woman was his wife who he presumed dead. Mrs Lovett had neglected to tell him that she hadn't died of the poison. So he dances with Mrs. Lovett (who tricked him out of love) and throws her into the furnace. Then her young shophand kills Sweeney with his own blade. Roll the end credits. It is based on a book, "The String of Pearls," which is pretty much what I just described but in book form. Sweeney Todd's existance has not been proven nor has it been disproven.

What was bad about the movie?
The worst thing I could find in the movie was the absolute fakeness of the blood. The movie's rating, review, and plot is completely revolved around the bloodshed, and it looked like Dawn of the Dead. Now, I'm not trying to criticize Dawn of the Dead, I'm just saying it's a movie from 1976. The blood is pretty much red paint and you can tell. The same is with Sweeney Todd, and I wonder if they just went to the Monroeville Mall and stole the blood props from there. I cannot, for the life of me, understand why all the other visual effects were so virtually flawless while the blood lmade it look like a 70's movie. It was made in 2007, yet I wonder if maybe they actually made it 30 years before hand. Then I see the other graphics and think, Nah.

What did I like, love, enjoy, etc.?
I loved so much of this movie. The plot was spectacular. Think about it: A man driven mad by the death of his wife who wasn't really dead and he ends up killing her in the end? And then, when his daughter is hiding in the trunk, he thinks she's a boy and tries to kill her, when if he weren't so crazy and his bloodlust wasn't so high he'd realize that he was finally meeting his daughter. He destroys every chance at happiness he could've ever achieved, and it seemed totally necessary.
Another thing I loved was how well the characters fit. Though I wonder if Tim Burton is a Harry Potter fan, because the lady who played Mrs. Lovett played Bellatrix Lestrange, the man who played Judge Turpin played Severus Snape, and the man who played the Judge's associate (who's name escapes me) played Wormtail. Back to the phenominal casting: Johnny Depp. No, I am not a JD fanatic. Though I do realize his immense talent. But as soon as I saw him as a lunatic pirate I knew that he was a great actor. (don't ask how) And when I heard that JD (that's what I'm calling him for shortness's sake) was playing a homocidal maniac throat-slitting vengeful demon barber, I knew he was perfect for the part.

All in all, this was a spectacular movie. Unless you're squeamish, easily scared, afraid of sharp objects or barbers, or just have a huge stick up your ass, you should definitely watch this movie. One thing I can say: Well done, Tim Burton. You've done it again.