i'm not a game ._.
With one word, you went from making me feel loved and happy to nothing but a game, a challenge you gave yourself to see if you’re as good as you thought. I’ve been blind to your little scheme this whole time, but looking back, the warning signs were there, flashing in bright neon colors. Why did I ignore them? I don’t know. Why didn’t I tell you that I had to get you out of my life? I don’t know that either. But I do know that I should’ve. You screamed dangerous from the moment I met you. You made me feel painfully vulnerable, yet I couldn’t think of not having you in my life. You became a drug for me simply overnight. It didn’t make sense then and it doesn’t make sense now. That’s what bothers me the most. I can read you like a book now, you make perfect sense. But my attraction to you doesn’t; it’s absurd. What’s even more frightening is that I want to play your game with you now, I want to play it against you so you’ll feel just as much disgust with yourself as I do. I hate feeling like that, believe it or not. It sickens me to the core. But I can’t shake it. I can’t sit here and let you have your way with me without fighting back. You’ll never know this of course. It will be my secret. And when all of this is done, I will deal with whatever comes. Sounds fair to me.
[I was obviously very mad and annoyed when I wrote this. D: And you probably have no idea what it’s about, but that’s okay. Thank you for reading.]
[I was obviously very mad and annoyed when I wrote this. D: And you probably have no idea what it’s about, but that’s okay. Thank you for reading.]
