I dream of drowning. The first time the water was so dark and unclear that I had to fight to see my hand in front my face. I fought against the current to stay in the pool of light but the darkness always reeled me back in. Each time that I thought I could see clearer, the darkness took over again. I tried kicking my feet from the rocks and coral to push my way back up but each time i was forced back down again. I became tired and weary. The rejection by the light was knocking me down and breaking my spirits, I couldn't see any way back. I found it hard to believe I was losing light, I was being sucked down into the depths of a dark ocean I did not know. It mirrors the situation I'm currently facing: the unknown.
The second time it happened, things were clearer. The water was warmer and more comforting, almost soft against my skin as I floated aimlessly in a sea of clear and calm waters. It felt so sweet and soft that I really didnt mind. I was carelessly floating amongst the wildlife and plants and I could hear the sound of your voice in my ear, calmly reassuring me that things were okay and this pace through life was what I needed. My heart was racing, I craved the adrenaline rush of being with you and being young and exciting with my whole life in front of me. The current caught my body and dragged me mindlessly into a spiral heading in a direction unknown. I was on my way to my next adventure. To you. To life. To living.

I have no idea if this makes sense at all, but its just what I've been dreaming of.
Posted on September 19th, 2009 at 01:58pm


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