Hmm...Election soon. For us UKians anyways.

Okay, let's go a few months into the future: It's May. Election night. Who do you wanna win? Who will you vote for if you wanna vote?

What choice do you have?

New Labour

Waaaay, those lovely civil warring Thatcherites. The backbenchers are revolting, nobody really leads properly yet and they are mired in scandal after scandal; Sex, drugs...more sex...immigration, illegal wars, more sex, Catherine Tate, murderers set loose, NHS in a sorry state, Home Office would be better off based in Basra, John Prescott...the only thing to make this party anymore like Thatcher's would be if Tony turned into a transvestite.

Can we handle having another 4 years under these people? These Tories in Labour clothing?

Conservatives

Of course, in Scotland, no-one likes a Tory. It's a traditional thing with us Scots. It's like England and Tyranny or Russia and Vodka. It's tradition. We have no standard elected Tories in the Scottish Parliament and we don't want them. So that is against them anyway.

Then, you have the Almighty Green-Tinted Prat - David Cameron. The hypocrite!

Nuh uh, no way Jimmy!

Liberal Democrats

Charles Kennedy. Drinker. Ginger. Scottish. Funny. Nuff said.

NO wait, I lied. They fired him! That sexy (yeah, I said it. Deal with it. I admit it! I have a crush on Charles Kennedy. Deal with it. Dammit!) politician. I ran for the Lib Dems for that man!

Now...they are a weak party which Labour uses as a pivot. Tricky. If you have no other person in mind...go for these guys.

Other Parties
1. SNP - Pros- Is ran by some dude named Alec Salmond, wanted indepedance for Scotland. Cons - They are like a warped Lib Dems.

2. SSP- Pros- Socialistic, free school meals for every kid, wants to legalise pot. Cons- Tommy Sheridan...nuff said.

3. BNP- Pro....uh..... Cons- Racist much?

4. Green Party - Pros - Want a better place for us to live. Cons- Generally associated with hippies.

5. Screaming Loony Party - Pros - Honest! Cons - I don't like Marmite...

6. Independant - THE BEST PARTIES EVERRR. VOTE THESE PEOPLE IN RIGHT GODDAMN NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




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This was a Public Political Broadcast by the Nuke Everyone Party.

Posted on March 16th, 2007 at 10:03pm

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