Rules for MySpace

I get extremely annoyed with MySpace. And one of the reasons is because the majority people of the internet world have no idea how to make their page look good. They get drawn in by flashy items which serve no relevence other than to annoy me. And music on AutoPlay. I want to kill autoplay.

So here are my rules.

1. If you are going to have a song on your MySpace do NOT have it set to AutoPlay. All it does is annoy people. Nobody wants to hear your music over the top of theirs. Or, if they're enjoying the peace and quiet of their home, they don't want loud music to just start blaring from their speakers. It's scary and annoying. If I want to hear your music I'll turn it on myself.

And don't give me "It's boring without music on MySpace" or "It's for people who are too lazy to press Play". If people want music on your MySpace then they'll press the Play button. And if they're too lazy to move a mouse and click a button then they don't deserve to listen to your music in the first place.

The AutoPlay rule also applies to videos you put on your Space as well.


2. People don't want to be blinded. Therefore, don't use fluro extreme colours as your background. Really bright colours are ugly and they can and will blind people who stare at it for long periods of time trying to read your profile.

3. Web design, which can also be applied to MySpace, as it is a web page, is based on consistency. Have one consistent font throughout the whole thing. Have consistent colours throughout the whole thing. (non blinding colours). Have font colours which people can actually read without having to highlight the text. Having contrasting colours for background and text works best. This way the text is easily seen. For example white on black, or black on white.

Don't have a black background and grey text. I've discovered that depending on how much natural light my computer screen recieves at different times of the day, grey text on a black background can be near impossible to see.

4. Do NOT fill your MySpace with lots of glittery and flashy words and heading things. You may think they look cool. But they don't.

5. Don't put too many time wasters on your Space. By time wasters I mean little flash games that are available and things you can draw on and little virtual pets. They take forever to load and seriously, why do you need them? If a person wants to stay on your page, they will. They don't need a million flashy time wasting things distracting them.

6. Don't fill your MySpace with videos. Who in their right mind is going to sit and watch all of the videos on your Space? Nobody. In reality, hardly anybody will watch them except for you. So keep a video limit to two. And, as I said before, don't have videos set to AutoPlay. Just don't.

7. This point is to do with points 4, 5 and 6. Nobody likes to scroll down for 5 minutes just to read your comments. Therefore, don't fill your Space with all of the stuff in 4, 5 and 6.

8. Keep your layout simple. Simple layouts are nice, easy to read,look good and won't take a million years to load. Chances are you haven't made the layout yourself, so choosing the flashiest layout and loading it with a million time wasters isn't going to impress anybody. They'll know you got it all from somewhere else.


*rant over* I just really needed to get that out. This reminds me of one of Funky Platypus's Survival Guides. I didn't mean for it to sound like that, but I am just sick of ugly MySpace's.