Dirty filthy Christmas carols

My friends and I made these up last summer.

Rudolph Spoof

Rudolph the red-whore reindeer
Had a very shiny dick
And if you ever saw it
You would even say it grew.
All of the other red-whores
Used to laugh and call him gay,
They never let poor Rudolph
Join in any red-whore games (like Strip Poker).
Then one foggy Christmas Even,
Santa came to say,
Rudolph with your dick so bright
Won't you fuck my ass tonight?
Then all the red-whores loved him
As they shouted out with glee, Fuck Me!
Rudolph the red-whore reindeer,
You'll go down in everyone's pants (like me)!

Silent Night spoof

Silent night, holy night,
All is cum, all is right.
Round yon virgin, oh no more.
Holy infant, should have used a rubber.
Sleep in everyone's bed...
Sleep in everyone's bed...

Deck the Halls spoof

Deck the halls with boughs of holly
Fuck the men that are all jolly
'Tis the season to fuck Molly
Fa la la la la la la la la.
Dawn we now we're gay with Harold.
Fa la la la la la la la la.
Gather round and all fuck Carol.
Fa la la la la la la la la.

Away in a Manger spoof

We're gay in a manger,
No ho in our bed.
The little dick George, lay down his cum bed.
The stars in the sky, got a porn show tonight.
Little dick George came on the hay.

We Three Kings spoof

We three pimps of Orient are
Trying to get paid
We travel so far.
West-whore leading
Bitch receiving
Guide us to kinky sex tonight.

Carol of the Bells spoof

Hark how the hoes,
Sweet cum-filled hoes
All seem to say,
Fuck me today.
Pimp Mike is here,
Bringing cheap beer
To hard and old,
Pimps and the hos.

Frosty the Snowman spoof

Frosty the Snowbitch
Was a jolly happy soul
With a corncob clit
And a button nose
And two tits made out of coal.
Frosty the Snowbitch
Had to hurry on her way
But the lesbians say
She could turn them gay
Just the same as you and me.

Let it Snow spoof

Oh the frigid bitch in bed is frightful
But the fiery ho is delightful
And since the frigid bitch is stoned
Let me cum, let me fuck, let me blow
When I finally cum at last
How I hate going back to the bitch
But if you'll only suck my dick
All the way home I'll jack off.
My dick is slowly dying
And my dear we're still tit-fucking
But as long as you fuck me just so
Let me cum, let me fuck, let me blow

O Holy Night spoof

"Oh, kinky night
Your dick is hard and lubed
This is the night
Of our child being conceived"
"Stupid ho!"

Up on the Rooftop spoof

Up on the rooftop
Reindeers fuck
Down comes my dick and lots of cum
Down through the chimney with lots of lube
All for little dicks smaller than mine.

Jingle Bells spoof

Jingle balls
Jinge balls
Jingle all the way
Oh what fun it is to fuck
In one whore's open legs.
Hey!

Here Comes Santa Clause spoof

Here cums Santa Clause!
Here cums Santa Clause!
Here cums Santa Clause!
Right down Mommy's legs.
The vixen and bitchbag and all his whores
Pulling on his dong.
Balls are stinging,
Santa's screaming.
All is lubed and tight.
Grab a condom
And shave your bush,
Cuz Santa Clause cums tonight.

Hark the Herald Angels spoof

Hark the fat angels sing
Glory to the fat cock ring.
The penis in you
And dickburn mild.
We are sinners satisfied.
Joyful all ye dicks arise
Join the pussies and unit
Hark the fat angels sick
Glory to the fat cock ring.

lo freakin l!!!!

these are hysterical!

GENIOUS! pure genius.

yeah,that's the word

lol, freakin hilarious

^___^

Thanks.

We had a great time writing them. And singing them. With our younger siblings in the room. And our glaring parents.

Funny
but it's kinda June
WTF?

hehehe
funny.

Oh I got one!!!!!

Blueballs, Blueballs
It's dollar night at the titty club

You better watch out, I think it's a guy I'm really not sure but something atright, Hilary Clinton's coming to twn

Uh....ha?

That's freaking funny! -dies laughing-