Skateboard Princess

Board index - Your poetry

Author	Message
What's in a name? King For A Couple Of Days Age: 36 Gender: Female Posts: 2451	October 26th, 2006 at 09:30am Skateboard Princess She isn’t a typical little girl, No ordinary princess. You could tell. The asphalt has kissed her knees Almost white. Skirts aren’t part of her world And Pink simply doesn’t exist In her vocabulary. Only eight summers young, Isn’t really much time. But quite a while When growing up in the concrete jungle, Where anonymity Becomes part of the identity But Still every word is weighted, All features judged. One year and a mohawk Defined the difference Between her and the best friend A skater girl can wish for. Though things like that don’t matter When you both fly down streets and avenues through traffic. Late for school. Again. The world around them Wish to tear them apart. So young and already labelled Trouble A punk and a tomboy When All they really are Is best friends. But for now they can be together That girl who wrinkles her nose At the ballet and Barbie doll life And the boy who dares to cry. And for now she can be Nothing less than she is A skateboard princess So, what do you think?
Peter Petrelli King For A Couple Of Days Age: 35 Gender: Female Posts: 4161	October 26th, 2006 at 09:38am I really liked it. People try to approach this subject so often, and it become desperately cliched, but this is really good. In a few places your grammar's wrong, like words which should be plural, etc, but otherwise it's great
rollerpig GSBitch Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 62283	October 26th, 2006 at 09:50am Ginger Nuts: I really liked it. People try to approach this subject so often, and it become desperately cliched, but this is really good. In a few places your grammar's wrong, like words which should be plural, etc, but otherwise it's great !! Can't say it better. Good job.
What's in a name? King For A Couple Of Days Age: 36 Gender: Female Posts: 2451	October 26th, 2006 at 09:59am Thanks you two ^_^ Um, could I get a grammar correction perhaps? (It sucks not to have English as my first language )
Peter Petrelli King For A Couple Of Days Age: 35 Gender: Female Posts: 4161	October 26th, 2006 at 10:02am She isn’t a typical little girl, No ordinary princess. You could tell. The asphalt has kissed her knees Almost white. Skirts aren't part of her world And Pink simply doesn’t exist In her vocabulary. Only eight summers young, Isn’t really much time. But quite a while When growing up in the concrete jungle, Where anonymity Becomes part of the identity But Still every word is weighted, All features judged. One year and a mohawk Defined the difference Between her and the best friend A skater girl can wish for. Though things like that don’t matter When you both fly down streets and avenues through traffic. Late for school. Again. The world around them Wish to tear them apart. So young and already labelled Trouble A punk and a tomboy When All they really are Is best friends. But for now they can be together That girl who wrinkles her nose At the ballet and Barbie doll life And the boy who dares to cry. And for now she can be Nothing less than she is A skateboard princess There's not too many corrections to be made; just very simple errors, and nothing which impacts on the poem significantly.
What's in a name? King For A Couple Of Days Age: 36 Gender: Female Posts: 2451	October 26th, 2006 at 10:08am Thank you, dear. I know how it's supposed to be but I just miss the errors sometimes, you know.
love. King For A Couple Of Days Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 2844	October 26th, 2006 at 01:17pm i really liked it.
Meski Addict Age: 32 Gender: Male Posts: 14856	October 26th, 2006 at 02:15pm I liked it alot, I like all your poetry its very good, the way you handle the words and stuff.
What's in a name? King For A Couple Of Days Age: 36 Gender: Female Posts: 2451	October 26th, 2006 at 02:18pm Thanks You know, I've been writing poetry since I was 8. That's probably one reson to why I have a way with words. ^_^
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda King For A Couple Of Days Age: 34 Gender: Female Posts: 2921	October 26th, 2006 at 03:37pm I'm thinking like Ellen. Loved it.
What's in a name? King For A Couple Of Days Age: 36 Gender: Female Posts: 2451	October 26th, 2006 at 03:53pm I'm glad you do, dear soul mate.
**meagainstmyworld*** Shoot Me, I'm A Newbie Age: - Gender: - Posts: 83	October 26th, 2006 at 04:17pm that's really awesome!
The Rev Addict Age: 38 Gender: Male Posts: 14004	October 26th, 2006 at 05:37pm Fantastic!
ladyramone Post Whore Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 21701	October 26th, 2006 at 05:43pm oooooooooooooooooooooo spunkeh
Mikelvr King For A Couple Of Days Age: - Gender: - Posts: 2356	October 26th, 2006 at 05:43pm Wonderful :]!
What's in a name? King For A Couple Of Days Age: 36 Gender: Female Posts: 2451	October 27th, 2006 at 04:58am bows Thank you, thank you. You're far too kind
beans Geek Age: - Gender: - Posts: 222	October 27th, 2006 at 10:23am that poem is just awesome, i wudnt have the patience to do tht
IsabellaJade Shoot Me, I'm A Newbie Age: 29 Gender: Female Posts: 81	November 6th, 2006 at 04:05pm it reminds me of me and myh friend katie
What's in a name? King For A Couple Of Days Age: 36 Gender: Female Posts: 2451	November 6th, 2006 at 04:15pm Don’t revive old threads And thanks I guess even if you didn’t really compliment or anything. Thank you beans (I’m sorry if I’ve been mean to you btw but you got on my nerves too many times. I apologize and maybe we could get along from now one?)

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