Where the Circle Ends

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FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
King For A Couple Of Days
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 2921

Mibba
November 30th, 2006 at 08:03pm
I really like this one. Back to my shorter concept poems! Ahbrow

Where the Circle Ends

The truck ran over the curb,
Slid into the stop sign
And the wheel choked on asphalt.

Reverse.

The truck ran over the curb,
Slid into the stop sign
And the wheel choked on asphalt.

Stuck in a moment,
Lost finding where the circle ends.
Peter Petrelli
King For A Couple Of Days
Peter Petrelli
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 4161
December 1st, 2006 at 06:50am
It's... I'm not sure how to describe it. It's kind of 'trippy', if you know what I mean. Laughing Can't think of a better word. It's clever, that's what it is, and I love 'lost finding where the circle ends'.

Very Happy
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
King For A Couple Of Days
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 2921

Mibba
December 1st, 2006 at 10:15pm
Haha trippy is a new way to describe it. I think I agree with your use of that word though. Thanks. Very Happy
Maiku's Kind Ghost
King For A Couple Of Days
Maiku's Kind Ghost
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Posts: 2102

Mibba
December 2nd, 2006 at 11:43am
I found your poem to be intresting. The simple phrasing says so much.
spill_no_sick
Falling In Love With The Board
spill_no_sick
Age: 31
Gender: -
Posts: 8588
December 2nd, 2006 at 02:57pm
if you were a director I'd have to say you were Gus Van Sant

and if your creative genious were a country then you'd be China

seriously, the title, concept everything was brilliant

just brilliant

most of the time repitition is just one phrase, but for you, there are only two lines that aren't repition

way to turn all of poetry on its ass and take the piss out of it
10000000000000000000000000000000000000/100
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
King For A Couple Of Days
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 2921

Mibba
December 2nd, 2006 at 03:05pm
I feel so happy now. You've made my life. OMGyes

Thank you so much.
What's in a name?
King For A Couple Of Days
What's in a name?
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 2451

Mibba
December 4th, 2006 at 03:46pm
I really like how you turn everything about poetry upside down and actually manage to pull it off. I really like the last two lines, thought they were brilliant. They sorta made the whole poem Laughing To be honest I actually didn’t like this kind of poetry and in my opinion it’s nothing compared to other poems by you. But I’ll give you a lot of credit for doing it so well. Up
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
King For A Couple Of Days
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 2921

Mibba
December 4th, 2006 at 04:40pm
Haha it's good that you gave me your true opinion because I know that a lot of people aren't too fond of concept poems, or whatever you would call them. So thanks. Very Happy
What's in a name?
King For A Couple Of Days
What's in a name?
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 2451

Mibba
December 4th, 2006 at 05:03pm
I believe in honesty Cool

Yeah =P But so what if I don’t like a certain type of poem, I can still see if the poet is talented/writes well Very Happy (in other words, you’re welcome.)
Deernt.
Rotting On Here
Deernt.
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 48258

Mibba Blog
December 4th, 2006 at 07:22pm
The truck ran over the curb,
Slid into the stop sign
And the wheel choked on asphalt.


I enjoyed every bit of it. It has so much meaning which is ironic because it's placed into a couple of lines. XD

I liked the stanza up above. It provided me with an intense behavior and I just loved your poem.

YAY.
Cool
freedumb
Idiot
freedumb
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 617
December 4th, 2006 at 08:25pm
I also loved the last two lines. They sumed up the whole poem. Great job!
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
King For A Couple Of Days
FCPSITSGEPGEPGEPanda
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 2921

Mibba
December 5th, 2006 at 02:40pm
Surprised Thank you!

So much love. Cool
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