Love?

If this is put in the wrong place I'm sorry, but I would like some help on understanding that if what I have is real love. Does it make it alright that I haven't even been in a relationship with the guy?

Also is 5 years enough to love someone? Real genuine love?

It's not possible to define. You just *know*

Really, if you have to question it, it's not. There's a big difference between love and infatuation.

It all depends on how you feel. It could just be crazy stalker love like this one girl I know.

Some people believe in love itself, and some people dont.If you do, then you'll know when you do.
Its not a problem at all that you havent been with a guy. If i werent gay, then I would be one of those people who have never been with a guy in a relationship, you know?
I think 5 years in love enough to be able to say you love that person.
But that all comes back to if you really believe in love.

Well yeah you probably just know when you love someone
like love that intense feeling of affection and desire to anothe rperson, right?
if you don't actually believe in real love or stuff like that, love is just chemistry, the brain consistently releases a certain set of chemicals, including pheromones and stuff like that creating loss of appetite and sleep, and an intense feeling of excitement.
But like if you've been with a person for like 5 years or more you will certainly know if you love them or not.

That's the thing, I've not been with them. But as close friends goes yeah

missand:

That's the thing, I've not been with them. But as close friends goes yeah

Then you probably love him as a friend, as opposed to being in love with him.

Ilectreec Poossycet:

It's not possible to define. You just *know*

Really, if you have to question it, it's not. There's a big difference between love and infatuation.

I've always hated that definition.

How do you explain those situations where you're with someone and you're convinced you love them, but then a long time later after you've broken up, you look back on it, and in hindsight, you think, "ahaha, that wasn't love"?

Slow Riot.:

Ilectreec Poossycet:

It's not possible to define. You just *know*

Really, if you have to question it, it's not. There's a big difference between love and infatuation.

I've always hated that definition.

How do you explain those situations where you're with someone and you're convinced you love them, but then a long time later after you've broken up, you look back on it, and in hindsight, you think, "ahaha, that wasn't love"?

Then you live and learn.

You might hate it but it's the truth. There's just no way to describe it, you can't put rules or 'symptoms' to love. I mean, I felt great love for my last boyfriend but I wasn't 'in love' with him and I knew it...a sign for me was that I couldn't picture a future with him, and I didn't get the same 'butterflies' that I get with my current gent.

See, the first time we were a couple we were both convinced we were in love. Truly, madly, deeply. Then a lot of stuff got heaped on him and he couldn't handle it, he broke it off. Of course I was devastated and started questioning if it had really been love. I didn't see him for 15 months. For 4 months I was single and couldn't convince myself it wasn't love. For near 11 months I was with this other guy, but couldn't fall for him in the same way and couldn't stop feeling what I felt for my love.

Long story short, over that time we rebuilt the friendship we had before we got together...yet there were signals he still had some feelings for me. However, he was emotionally fragile and I was worried about him, so I got him to come here and stay for a week. Turns out he had been longing for me all this time, just like I had...it was madness to not give it another try.

A year and a half apart and neither of us felt our feelings fade at all, even though we both were with others during that time. We're always there for each other when either needs some support. We can see a future together; marriage, kids, who knows...we each travel great distance just to be together. We felt incomplete, and both our lives took something of a nosedive, when we were apart. Feeling completely safe and totally independent at the same time. Intense emotional connection, like one soul shared between two bodies. Comfortable silences. A simple look, that makes your heart sing. Kisses that still make you weak, 3 years since the first. That, to me, is love.

Love is when you can't picture yourself with that person, when all you see is them in your future, when they're essential to your existance, almost.

As of now, I don't believe in love simply because I haven't experienced love or the emotion and the whole nine yards about love with anyone. I mean, I love my family, but that's different.. I know friends who do and friends who don't...

Maybe in a few months, or years, it'll be different... I hope! Beside, I'm finding out who I am right now, not who I want to be with for the rest of my life.. or at least not yet..