Escape From Ze Volcano, chapter 1
It was spring break in Berkley California and everyone was going to exciting places like Antarctica and Kentucky Fried Chicken. But not Green Day. Sadly, they had to go to Hawaii.
"Dang. Everyone else goes to cool places over spring break and where do we go? Fucking Hawaii!" Billie Joe complained.
"Yeah! We go somewhere tropical while everybody is freezing their asses to death! It's simply not fair," Tre said.
" I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts," sang Mike. Tre promptly chucked a jurassic monkey at him.
The next day, the boys drove to the airport in Billie Joe's old junky Ford. It burned out 1,039 times. Finally they arrived. While going through security, Mike set the metal detector off. The problem object was. . . a nail file.
"What? I have to keep my nails looking great!" Mike said in response to all the teasing.
On the plane to Hawaii, Tre took a buttload of peanuts and threw them at random people. Billie Joe tried to seduce the flight attendant. Mike filed his nails to absolute perfection.
As they stepped off the plane, a native put a lei around their necks.
"What the hell is this thingy?" Billie Joe asked.
"BURN IT!" screamed Mike.
"Have a peanut, buddy," Tre said, throwing a handful at the native.
"AAH! Ye American idiots! You have no respect for my country. I will show you what Hawaii is all about by giving you a personal tour," the native said.
"Okay, as long as my hair doesn't get messed up," replied Mike.
So the native lured the boys into a secret hidden lvolcano air by promising them some Cheech. Once Green Day was trapped, they were forced to watch "Flipper" 24/7.
"Why are you doing this? We are just a bunch of basket cases looking for fun," Billie Joe asked.
"Because you brought the evil that is the peanut onto my land," the native said.
So the boys beat the shit out of the native with some sweet guitars and a drumset that just happened to be lying around. A rumbling sound filled the volcano.
"Tre, is that you?" Mike asked.
"It's the volcano! Rum for your lives!!!!!" screamed Tre while running around hysterically.
"We're doomed," Billie Joe stated.
"Wait! All we have to do is plug the magma chamber and the volcano won't erupt," Tre said.
"Where the hell did you learn that from?" Mike asked.
"A brochure on the plane," Tre responded.
So they used Mike's indestructible bass guitar to plug the volcano. They ran away and then the volcano erupted.
Moral: When visiting Hawaii never forget to bring a bass and please DO NOT THROW PEANUTS AT NATIVES!
"Dang. Everyone else goes to cool places over spring break and where do we go? Fucking Hawaii!" Billie Joe complained.
"Yeah! We go somewhere tropical while everybody is freezing their asses to death! It's simply not fair," Tre said.
" I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts," sang Mike. Tre promptly chucked a jurassic monkey at him.
The next day, the boys drove to the airport in Billie Joe's old junky Ford. It burned out 1,039 times. Finally they arrived. While going through security, Mike set the metal detector off. The problem object was. . . a nail file.
"What? I have to keep my nails looking great!" Mike said in response to all the teasing.
On the plane to Hawaii, Tre took a buttload of peanuts and threw them at random people. Billie Joe tried to seduce the flight attendant. Mike filed his nails to absolute perfection.
As they stepped off the plane, a native put a lei around their necks.
"What the hell is this thingy?" Billie Joe asked.
"BURN IT!" screamed Mike.
"Have a peanut, buddy," Tre said, throwing a handful at the native.
"AAH! Ye American idiots! You have no respect for my country. I will show you what Hawaii is all about by giving you a personal tour," the native said.
"Okay, as long as my hair doesn't get messed up," replied Mike.
So the native lured the boys into a secret hidden lvolcano air by promising them some Cheech. Once Green Day was trapped, they were forced to watch "Flipper" 24/7.
"Why are you doing this? We are just a bunch of basket cases looking for fun," Billie Joe asked.
"Because you brought the evil that is the peanut onto my land," the native said.
So the boys beat the shit out of the native with some sweet guitars and a drumset that just happened to be lying around. A rumbling sound filled the volcano.
"Tre, is that you?" Mike asked.
"It's the volcano! Rum for your lives!!!!!" screamed Tre while running around hysterically.
"We're doomed," Billie Joe stated.
"Wait! All we have to do is plug the magma chamber and the volcano won't erupt," Tre said.
"Where the hell did you learn that from?" Mike asked.
"A brochure on the plane," Tre responded.
So they used Mike's indestructible bass guitar to plug the volcano. They ran away and then the volcano erupted.
Moral: When visiting Hawaii never forget to bring a bass and please DO NOT THROW PEANUTS AT NATIVES!
