Full Of Rage... Maybe Forever, chapter 6
*One Year Later*
*Sheena's house*
"Wow that was weird." Sheena sighed as she entered her house and stood back against the door she had just shut.
"What was weird?" Sheena jumped at just hearing someone's voice. She instantly whipped her head around to see who it was. She let out a breath once noticing it was her one-month-pregnant sister, Maradith.
'O yeah,' Sheena thought, 'my "once perfect" sister was pregnant. Gotta remember that.'
Maradith gave her startled sister a smirk that was mostly meant to be sympathetic; inside that is.
"Chill out, I'm not Dad."
'There's one more shitty thing my life's been turned into. Dad only hits me. I wonder if he would hit Mare if she wasn't pregnant.' Sheena once more collected in her mind.
After today's events, Sheena came to the thought that by now, she almost had a reason to complain.
So she was trying it out; taking it for a spin if you will.
"No, I just was kind of thinking about something."
"O, you mean whatever was weird?"
Sheena smiled one very lifeless smile.
"Yeah."
Maradith's younger sister took a seat at the table that she herself was eating a sandwich in. Sheena took out her books right there, and started to work on her homework, and for some reason unknown, temporarily forgetting about possibly running into her father.
Maradith waited for a response from Sheena, but got none.
"So, the weird thing... ?"
Sheena slowly looked up from her work, shaken out of her peaceful thoughts. This almost made her angry. It was almost like she just couldn't hold on to anything but paranoia.
"O, it was nothing; I was just given some stuff after school today."
Maradith quirked an eyebrow.
"Stuff?"
"Yeah. I think I belong to a "group." Sheena said, her face once more looking at her work, but making quotations with her free hand.
"Ok, could you be anymore vague?"
Sheena sighed a little more annoyed than she really was, and took out a paper bag from her book bag. She handed it across the table to her sister. Maradith opened it slowly, only to burst out laughing.
"Who the hell gave you pot... and some cassettes?"
Sheena for the first time in a couple of months smiled a heartfelt smile. She did think the situation was pretty funny.
"Well, some punk kids apparently thought I was one of them, reason being I don't talk much, and I apparently dress like them; two things I had never noticed. I mean, do I really dress like that?"
Maradith looked at her sister.
"Well, I must say, that your style has changed a bit recently. I mean, you haven't bought a new pair of jeans recently enough to keep from getting holes in your old ones, not to mention all you wear is jeans. And then, you basically just pick any random shirt out of your closet. Then again, everything goes with jeans. And you don't wear your hair up anymore, and you haven't got it cut, so it just grows anywhere, including over your face. So yeah, I could see how you could be mistaken for someone like that."
Sheena just eyed her sister while she spoke, all the while thinking that everything she was saying was true, and that she just didn't really care about style or fashion anymore. After all, it did all of a sudden seem like such a dumb thing to care about.
"Well, anyway, this apparently is my initiation or something."
Maradith just nodded a little blankly.
"So, are you going to fulfill your initiation, or what?"
Sheena taped her pen to her mouth a couple of times.
"I dunno. I mean, I definitely know I am going to listen to the cassettes; I haven't had some music to focus on in awhile, but I'm still pretty unsure about the pot."
"Well," Maradith said while getting up, "I am not going to lie, it does feel pretty good for awhile, but it is still a bad habit to get into. Considering our recent situation, it is up to you. You have complete freedom to do whatever you want this time." And she walked out leaving Sheena with one thought in her mind.
She hadn't felt truly good in so long, that it was unanimous.
Sheena woke the next day to a pounding headache. She grabbed her forehead with her right hand in pain. Not to mention, the "Saturday-California" sun was streaming into the room through an open window, and that alone could have made a strong man cry.
"I guess I should've told you how much to smoke, huh?"
Sheena opened the eyes that she had snapped shut as soon as she opened them the first time. Maradith was standing above her. Apparently she was on the floor.
"Hmmmm? O, yeah I guess... ... Why am I on the floor?"
"'Cuz I couldn't, well more like didn't want to try to, get you upstairs."
Sheena then realized she was in the living room. She shot up, and got a head rush that was about the equivalent of shoving your head down a toilet's hole, and flushing 5 times.
Thus: swirly times 100.
"Oh shit." She said while placing her hand back onto her forehead.
Once she shook it off, for the most part, she turned to her sister.
"Where's dad?"
Maradith then realized what caused her to act as she did.
"Don't worry; he didn't come home last night. He was over at his girlfriend's house."
'Hey,' Sheena thought, 'I just woke up, and I have already been reminded of things that I really could live without; Dad has a girlfriend.'
"Oh." And she added a sigh of partial relief; Dad hadn't seen her, high, on the floor.
Maradith noticed Sheena's somewhat relief, and was immediately stricken with guilt. She went to go sit down next to her on the floor. She placed her arm around her, and hugged her.
"Sheena, I want to do something sooo bad, but-" Sheena cut her off.
"We've been over this, Mare. I don't want you tell anyone, or talk to Dad. People will think I am a wimp, and it would only make Dad angrier. I hurt, and I don't want him to get mad at you because you did something, especially because of the baby."
"I know, but I am your older sister, and I don't want him to hurt you anymore."
Sheena silently shook her head, as tears brimmed in her eyes.
"If you don't, then don't say anything."
Maradith opened her mouth to protest once again, but stopped in seeing Sheena's now wet cheeks. She realized arguing was the last thing her sister needed, or wanted for that matter. She squeezed her sister tighter, as Sheena turned to her and cried into her shoulder.
*About a month later* (I'm sorry to just keep skipping time and all, but I promise I won't do it again for a long while.)
*Rodeo*
Billie Joe had recently noticed a change in Jane's mood. She seemed much happier than she had been. Of course the fact that he had stopped questioning her about her mood helped quite a bit, but he could tell that wasn't all. This was more recent. And, it only seemed to get better every day; like she was building up to something, or maybe waiting. Either way, this helped Billie Joe to know that she and him were ok. Not great, just ok. But a really good ok.
"Why have you been so happy all of a sudden?" Billie questioned her one day when she, him, and Mike were all over at his house. Jane had just come over to listen to them practice, while momentarily doing some homework.
Jane looked up from her work, and opened her mouth, but Mike answered first.
"Honestly, Bill. You gave her shit when she was sad... " Billie Joe started laughing as Mike continued on. Jane joined Billie Joe in laughing.
"And now," Mike kept on, "You're giving her shit when she is happy." Mike looked over at Jane and sighed.
"Men." Jane only laughed harder.
"No," Billie Joe protested after he was done laughing, "I only wanted to know if I missed something or whatever. I mean, it was kind of a sudden thing. Is Sheena better or something, 'cuz that was the reason of you quote un-quote depression."
Jane disregarded what he said about Sheena being the reason, and just focused on him assuming that something was different with Sheena. She changed her expression quickly enough for her to look suspicious.
She didn't know what to say. She couldn't keep lying to Billie Joe, but she still couldn't tell him the truth. She had dug herself too far into a hole, and she didn't really want to face the consequences of getting out. She had decided it was best to just let the whole thing sort itself out in the end.
In her gut, she knew it wasn't going to be that easy. Not after what was going to happen.
"No, Billie Joe," She said as casually as possible, but he still wore a look of suspicion, "It is just because I have just been in a better mood. There really is no culprit."
Billie Joe nodded his response, but he still had the image of her face when he mentioned Sheena.
Mike changed the subject.
"So when is that new drummer you promised me going to be here, Bj?"
"New drummer?" Jane inquired.
"Yeah," Mike answered, "Billie Joe found a new drummer for the band at Gilman; Tre Cool."
Jane nodded, just as there was a knock on the door.
"Speak of the devil... .." Billie Joe said as he got up to go answer it.
The next day, Billie Joe, Mike, and Tre, (Jane was late) were all sitting in the cafeteria before the first bell had wrung, awaiting the school day. They were all in some deep conversation about who knows what, when a girl Billie Joe hadn't seen before, caught his eye. He couldn't seem to focus on anything else. He wanted to meet this new person.
Interrupting their speaking, Billie Joe stood up from his seat.
"Well, if you will excuse me, I am going to go work my irresistibleness and charm, and go introduce myself to a girl, while you guys waste away talking.
Tre smirked.
"Fine by me, Bill. You were draggin' us down anyway; makin' us look bad. I just didn't want to say anything, ya know, with the whole self esteem thing."
Billie Joe just laughed.
"Gee, thanks."
*Sheena's house*
"Wow that was weird." Sheena sighed as she entered her house and stood back against the door she had just shut.
"What was weird?" Sheena jumped at just hearing someone's voice. She instantly whipped her head around to see who it was. She let out a breath once noticing it was her one-month-pregnant sister, Maradith.
'O yeah,' Sheena thought, 'my "once perfect" sister was pregnant. Gotta remember that.'
Maradith gave her startled sister a smirk that was mostly meant to be sympathetic; inside that is.
"Chill out, I'm not Dad."
'There's one more shitty thing my life's been turned into. Dad only hits me. I wonder if he would hit Mare if she wasn't pregnant.' Sheena once more collected in her mind.
After today's events, Sheena came to the thought that by now, she almost had a reason to complain.
So she was trying it out; taking it for a spin if you will.
"No, I just was kind of thinking about something."
"O, you mean whatever was weird?"
Sheena smiled one very lifeless smile.
"Yeah."
Maradith's younger sister took a seat at the table that she herself was eating a sandwich in. Sheena took out her books right there, and started to work on her homework, and for some reason unknown, temporarily forgetting about possibly running into her father.
Maradith waited for a response from Sheena, but got none.
"So, the weird thing... ?"
Sheena slowly looked up from her work, shaken out of her peaceful thoughts. This almost made her angry. It was almost like she just couldn't hold on to anything but paranoia.
"O, it was nothing; I was just given some stuff after school today."
Maradith quirked an eyebrow.
"Stuff?"
"Yeah. I think I belong to a "group." Sheena said, her face once more looking at her work, but making quotations with her free hand.
"Ok, could you be anymore vague?"
Sheena sighed a little more annoyed than she really was, and took out a paper bag from her book bag. She handed it across the table to her sister. Maradith opened it slowly, only to burst out laughing.
"Who the hell gave you pot... and some cassettes?"
Sheena for the first time in a couple of months smiled a heartfelt smile. She did think the situation was pretty funny.
"Well, some punk kids apparently thought I was one of them, reason being I don't talk much, and I apparently dress like them; two things I had never noticed. I mean, do I really dress like that?"
Maradith looked at her sister.
"Well, I must say, that your style has changed a bit recently. I mean, you haven't bought a new pair of jeans recently enough to keep from getting holes in your old ones, not to mention all you wear is jeans. And then, you basically just pick any random shirt out of your closet. Then again, everything goes with jeans. And you don't wear your hair up anymore, and you haven't got it cut, so it just grows anywhere, including over your face. So yeah, I could see how you could be mistaken for someone like that."
Sheena just eyed her sister while she spoke, all the while thinking that everything she was saying was true, and that she just didn't really care about style or fashion anymore. After all, it did all of a sudden seem like such a dumb thing to care about.
"Well, anyway, this apparently is my initiation or something."
Maradith just nodded a little blankly.
"So, are you going to fulfill your initiation, or what?"
Sheena taped her pen to her mouth a couple of times.
"I dunno. I mean, I definitely know I am going to listen to the cassettes; I haven't had some music to focus on in awhile, but I'm still pretty unsure about the pot."
"Well," Maradith said while getting up, "I am not going to lie, it does feel pretty good for awhile, but it is still a bad habit to get into. Considering our recent situation, it is up to you. You have complete freedom to do whatever you want this time." And she walked out leaving Sheena with one thought in her mind.
She hadn't felt truly good in so long, that it was unanimous.
Sheena woke the next day to a pounding headache. She grabbed her forehead with her right hand in pain. Not to mention, the "Saturday-California" sun was streaming into the room through an open window, and that alone could have made a strong man cry.
"I guess I should've told you how much to smoke, huh?"
Sheena opened the eyes that she had snapped shut as soon as she opened them the first time. Maradith was standing above her. Apparently she was on the floor.
"Hmmmm? O, yeah I guess... ... Why am I on the floor?"
"'Cuz I couldn't, well more like didn't want to try to, get you upstairs."
Sheena then realized she was in the living room. She shot up, and got a head rush that was about the equivalent of shoving your head down a toilet's hole, and flushing 5 times.
Thus: swirly times 100.
"Oh shit." She said while placing her hand back onto her forehead.
Once she shook it off, for the most part, she turned to her sister.
"Where's dad?"
Maradith then realized what caused her to act as she did.
"Don't worry; he didn't come home last night. He was over at his girlfriend's house."
'Hey,' Sheena thought, 'I just woke up, and I have already been reminded of things that I really could live without; Dad has a girlfriend.'
"Oh." And she added a sigh of partial relief; Dad hadn't seen her, high, on the floor.
Maradith noticed Sheena's somewhat relief, and was immediately stricken with guilt. She went to go sit down next to her on the floor. She placed her arm around her, and hugged her.
"Sheena, I want to do something sooo bad, but-" Sheena cut her off.
"We've been over this, Mare. I don't want you tell anyone, or talk to Dad. People will think I am a wimp, and it would only make Dad angrier. I hurt, and I don't want him to get mad at you because you did something, especially because of the baby."
"I know, but I am your older sister, and I don't want him to hurt you anymore."
Sheena silently shook her head, as tears brimmed in her eyes.
"If you don't, then don't say anything."
Maradith opened her mouth to protest once again, but stopped in seeing Sheena's now wet cheeks. She realized arguing was the last thing her sister needed, or wanted for that matter. She squeezed her sister tighter, as Sheena turned to her and cried into her shoulder.
*About a month later* (I'm sorry to just keep skipping time and all, but I promise I won't do it again for a long while.)
*Rodeo*
Billie Joe had recently noticed a change in Jane's mood. She seemed much happier than she had been. Of course the fact that he had stopped questioning her about her mood helped quite a bit, but he could tell that wasn't all. This was more recent. And, it only seemed to get better every day; like she was building up to something, or maybe waiting. Either way, this helped Billie Joe to know that she and him were ok. Not great, just ok. But a really good ok.
"Why have you been so happy all of a sudden?" Billie questioned her one day when she, him, and Mike were all over at his house. Jane had just come over to listen to them practice, while momentarily doing some homework.
Jane looked up from her work, and opened her mouth, but Mike answered first.
"Honestly, Bill. You gave her shit when she was sad... " Billie Joe started laughing as Mike continued on. Jane joined Billie Joe in laughing.
"And now," Mike kept on, "You're giving her shit when she is happy." Mike looked over at Jane and sighed.
"Men." Jane only laughed harder.
"No," Billie Joe protested after he was done laughing, "I only wanted to know if I missed something or whatever. I mean, it was kind of a sudden thing. Is Sheena better or something, 'cuz that was the reason of you quote un-quote depression."
Jane disregarded what he said about Sheena being the reason, and just focused on him assuming that something was different with Sheena. She changed her expression quickly enough for her to look suspicious.
She didn't know what to say. She couldn't keep lying to Billie Joe, but she still couldn't tell him the truth. She had dug herself too far into a hole, and she didn't really want to face the consequences of getting out. She had decided it was best to just let the whole thing sort itself out in the end.
In her gut, she knew it wasn't going to be that easy. Not after what was going to happen.
"No, Billie Joe," She said as casually as possible, but he still wore a look of suspicion, "It is just because I have just been in a better mood. There really is no culprit."
Billie Joe nodded his response, but he still had the image of her face when he mentioned Sheena.
Mike changed the subject.
"So when is that new drummer you promised me going to be here, Bj?"
"New drummer?" Jane inquired.
"Yeah," Mike answered, "Billie Joe found a new drummer for the band at Gilman; Tre Cool."
Jane nodded, just as there was a knock on the door.
"Speak of the devil... .." Billie Joe said as he got up to go answer it.
The next day, Billie Joe, Mike, and Tre, (Jane was late) were all sitting in the cafeteria before the first bell had wrung, awaiting the school day. They were all in some deep conversation about who knows what, when a girl Billie Joe hadn't seen before, caught his eye. He couldn't seem to focus on anything else. He wanted to meet this new person.
Interrupting their speaking, Billie Joe stood up from his seat.
"Well, if you will excuse me, I am going to go work my irresistibleness and charm, and go introduce myself to a girl, while you guys waste away talking.
Tre smirked.
"Fine by me, Bill. You were draggin' us down anyway; makin' us look bad. I just didn't want to say anything, ya know, with the whole self esteem thing."
Billie Joe just laughed.
"Gee, thanks."
