Wake Me Up When the Maddness Ends, chapter 1
BILLIE'S POV
"What the hell am I suppose to do? I wondered to myself while I sat down and watched TV.
Nothing ever seemed to be going right anymore. Things have just been taking a really big tole on me. I have been even more depressed then I ever have been, but I don't know why. Yes, I have been depressed already, but now it is different. I think I have full blown depresseion actually if you ask me. Yes, Adrienne, Mike, and Tre have been doing everything in their power to help me, but nothing is. Adrienne has even told me to go and see a professional, but with the way I am, I said she was nuts.
"Billie, what is the fucking problem?"
I looked down at the floor. "I don't know! You really think I do?"
"Well, it is your life, you should. But why won't you go and see a professional? They could help you better than me and everyone else."
I looked up shocked at what she said. "No! That is something that I will not do!! Nope! I have my friends and family, I don't need a fucking shrink."
She sighed. "Do it for the kids at least. Even just Joey. He can tell when something isn't right. And he knows it now. He asks me everyday what is wrong with you and the only thing I can tell him is that you are very sad right now. But that doesn't help because it leads to more questions that I don't have the amswers to."
Great, thanks for making me feel even more fucking guilty now.
"I'll think about it. Will that make you happy?"
She thought for a second. "I wanted to here yes you would go, but this is fine." She gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Everything will be okay. I know it will be."
I sighed. I wish I could believe it.
So thtat is why I am on the couch watching TV. And figures there is nothing on the goddamn thing. Reminds me of "Longview" when I say that.
I turned on CNN and saw that they were showing what they would do to get the war started. That made me even more depressed then I felt. A war. That is just what we need now, do we? Thanks alot Bush!!
But all of a sudden lyrics came into my head:
Don't want to be an American Idiot
"Sounds like it could be a good song. We lost all the other stuff anyway." I mumbled to myself.
I think I will write it. I don't see what could be so bad about it. I will show it to the guys tomorrow!!
"What the hell am I suppose to do? I wondered to myself while I sat down and watched TV.
Nothing ever seemed to be going right anymore. Things have just been taking a really big tole on me. I have been even more depressed then I ever have been, but I don't know why. Yes, I have been depressed already, but now it is different. I think I have full blown depresseion actually if you ask me. Yes, Adrienne, Mike, and Tre have been doing everything in their power to help me, but nothing is. Adrienne has even told me to go and see a professional, but with the way I am, I said she was nuts.
"Billie, what is the fucking problem?"
I looked down at the floor. "I don't know! You really think I do?"
"Well, it is your life, you should. But why won't you go and see a professional? They could help you better than me and everyone else."
I looked up shocked at what she said. "No! That is something that I will not do!! Nope! I have my friends and family, I don't need a fucking shrink."
She sighed. "Do it for the kids at least. Even just Joey. He can tell when something isn't right. And he knows it now. He asks me everyday what is wrong with you and the only thing I can tell him is that you are very sad right now. But that doesn't help because it leads to more questions that I don't have the amswers to."
Great, thanks for making me feel even more fucking guilty now.
"I'll think about it. Will that make you happy?"
She thought for a second. "I wanted to here yes you would go, but this is fine." She gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Everything will be okay. I know it will be."
I sighed. I wish I could believe it.
So thtat is why I am on the couch watching TV. And figures there is nothing on the goddamn thing. Reminds me of "Longview" when I say that.
I turned on CNN and saw that they were showing what they would do to get the war started. That made me even more depressed then I felt. A war. That is just what we need now, do we? Thanks alot Bush!!
But all of a sudden lyrics came into my head:
Don't want to be an American Idiot
"Sounds like it could be a good song. We lost all the other stuff anyway." I mumbled to myself.
I think I will write it. I don't see what could be so bad about it. I will show it to the guys tomorrow!!
Page 1/2 | Next
