A Note Don't Come Easy, chapter 25
Tre and Mike stepped out of the limo and onto the big red carpet, lapping up the attention as the screams suddenly rose up 10 levels from the crowd at seeing two members from Green Day. They smiled, waved, gestured and winked at both the camera's and fans, all shouting different things at them.
"Tre over here! Tre! - Mike! - Mike and Tre! Over here! - Smile for me... oh my god we love you Tre and Mike! - It's Green Day! - Tre! Mike! Tre!"
The screams kept coming. It was a whirlwind of noise and cries.
I watched, stunned from inside the limo still, not wanting to move from the very spot I was sitting in. Billie Joe sighed deeply, twisting his body around on the leather positioning himself to move out onto the sidewalk with his fellow band mates.
"Here we go." He grumbled to me, before I suddenly shot my hand out and grabbed his arm before he could escape from the limo.
"Billie Joe!" I gasped, my eyes sharp and anxious.
He looked back on me, raising an eyebrow in suspension of my sudden outburst. I opened my mouth to say something but I couldn't. I mumbled my words.
"I... I - I can't."
"Can't what?"
He swung himself back round to stare straight back at me.
"Go out there." I croaked, my throat closing up from the immense pressure that was produced by my heart beating faster and faster, higher and higher.
"I'm - scared." I added, gulping and taking in every detail of his face.
"Come on Stef." He pleaded. "You can do this. I know you can."
He cupped his hands in mine, stroking them as he tried to calm me down.
"All you got to do is smile and wave. Nothing else. You don't even have to open your mouth and speak if you don't want to. Just leave it all to me. I have it all planned."
Screams and chants of 'Billie Joe! Billie Joe!' came from outside as Tre and Mike walked down the crowds of fans, singing autographs and posing for pictures. I looked outside, panic-stricken as the fans yelled for their favorite guitarist. Oh my god. Now I couldn't go outside. People would start hurling abuse at me, if they saw me with Billie Joe. Billie Joe looked at me with desperation, but smiling at me to try and make my nerves feel better.
"Come on. Thing's will get worse if we don't go now. People will get a lil' - suspicious."
As if they weren't already. The chanting grew louder and louder, demanding for Billie Joe to step out of the limo.
"Let's go." He told me, grabbing hold of my hand and leaning forward to move out of the limo.
"Billie Joe!" I gritted through my teeth, before he stepped out of the limo, dragging me with him.
What was he going to tell the media to as why I was with them? But I never got the chance to ask him as the next thing I knew he had dragged me out of limo and we were standing in front of a hundred flashing lights and screaming fans. Their roars echoed throughout, slightly deafening me and causing me to stagger back a little, but not noticeable. I looked about, the many faces of the crowd and media just blending into one. Like a little kid missing its mummy, I edged nearer Billie Joe wanting to feel some security. He waved to the crowd and the numerous media cameras, walking straight past them without stopping to say a few words, despite their cries and demands for photos or speeches. He caught up with Mike and Tre, me tailing behind him, before they headed inside.
"Sorry guys!" He called to the cameras and journalists, walking past. "Not tonight thanks."
"Who's this Billie Joe?" The media and paparazzi were shouting pointing at me and trying to grab his attention. "Billie! - Billie Joe!"
He simply turned around and smiled knowingly, as Tre and Mike took me up the steps and inside, like my bodyguards.
"Just a friend." Billie smiled. "A friend of Tre's."
Tre hastily turned around, looking at Billie, shocked as I was. That was his great plan?! But nothing more was said of it as we scrambled up the steps together, nerves getting the better of us. It wasn't that big of a problem I guess. Tre didn't mind. I think he liked the idea. The media and journalists protested to know more about me, calling out to Tre now, but were ignored completely by all of us.
We headed inside, the cameras and journalists following us through the door as far as they could before someone else came along and they focused on them.
* * * * * * * *
We sat in a row together, first Mike, Tre, then Billie Joe and I. I didn't sit between them, as then that would make it obvious I was with them. We had already been sitting her for an hour, already loosing out on two awards. But Green Day had a few fair chances left.
Billie Joe irritated, leaned towards me, before whispering something to me from out of the side of his mouth.
"I'm thinking of better things we could be doing then sitting here listening HIM mumble." He spoke, indicating towards the roundish figure on stage hosting the awards.
I had never even heard of the guy before. I was a bit startled that he had spoke. First of all we WERE in the middle of an awards show. We were supposed to be paying attention, especially with all the cameras darting past our faces every so often - it made me uncomfortable. My eyes remand staring at the stage.
"So can I."
He leaned back in towards me, his voice still quiet. "Wanna find a loo once we ditch this joint?"
I looked up at him, a mischievous glint in his eye. I smiled knowingly to him, many thoughts running through my head.
"I'm not going to refuse your offer of a bit of contact now am I Mr. Armstrong?" I simply replied, turning back to face the stage.
"By the way," he replied, now too transfixed on the same thing as I was. "You're gripping that armrest like its some sorta life preserver don't you think?"
I looked down at my clenched hands, instantly relaxing them at his mention.
"That's because I'm nervous for you." I remarked softly.
I stared at the stage - they were just about to announce the winner of the 'Best Rock Album' award.
"And the winner goes to... "
Ignoring what Billie Joe had just said, I instantly took hold of the armrest again and dug into it hard. I thought I heard Billie Joe take a slight inhale of breath as we waited in suspension whether they had actually done it this time.
"American Idiot! It's GREEN DAY!" The host roared, the cameras instantly flying over in our direction as the audience cheered.
Tre jumped out of his seat and punched the air, roaring loudly YES! Before the cameras could reach us, Billie snapped a quick peck upon my cheek, making me blush. Mike and Billie Joe stood up shortly after; lapping up the applause and cheers the audience were giving them.
Billie Joe straightened his jacket and brushed himself down smartly as he clambered over the row of people's legs to get out to go and collect the award, Mike and Tre already ahead of him. I watched in awe as the three of them waltzed up on stage, beaming to collect their award; Tre thrashing his fist in the air still in his excitement. I was so proud of them - I couldn't feel any happier for them. They walked up on stage to collect their gong as Aerosmith's Steven Tyler offered his hand suddenly to each of them to congratulate. I hadn't noticed him standing there before. I had been too occupied thinking about being in a toilet with Billie. From behind the podium, and holding the trophy a high, Billie Joe beamed down on the crowd.
"Rock 'n' Roll can be dangerous and fun at the same time." He said, as he picked up the band's award for best rock album. It was then that I realized that all of them were beaming uncontrollably, because it was then that they knew that American Idiot and all their hard work had finally been appreciated.
* * * * * * * *
It was only now, as I sat back on a chair at our table, admiring them all that I realized how much effort they had all put into their appearance tonight. Sporting dyed black hair and thick dark eyeliner (as always), Billie Joe had donned a skinny, black Dior suit for the special occasion. Mike and Tre too were wearing custom-made designer suits. It was a big leap from their old image, but was still really rock 'n' roll with a punk edge. After collecting their award, Green Day had ditched the ceremony feeling there was no need to stay, and had headed early towards the after party. But it was full already, even if most of the guests were still in the hall at the show. For a while now I had been watching the couples dance together on the floor, forgetting all their troubles and problems. It was my mission, I had decided to get Billie Joe to dance with me for at least one song tonight. Even if it did mean dragging him up there with me by his ankles. Tre sat opposite me at the table, laid back and slouched in his chair like he was a king or something. Billie Joe approached us, smiling after reappearing from having a fag outside.
"Hey," he said, smiling and walking towards us.
Tre titled his head in a slight nod that meant 'hey' back. I responded in a smile, before turning back to look at everyone together dancing. I was so desperate; I had to ask him now. Just looking at all the other couples made me long to be just like them with Billie. What I would give to him that with him. I would do anything. Besides, I had nothing else to really live for.
"Billie Joe?" I hesitated.
"Yeah?"
"You wanna dance?"
"Wah?!" He spluttered, shooting a look at me, Tre spluttering on his drink and spilling it everywhere in the thought of Billie Joe dancing.
He gave him an evil look, slightly red in the face before turning back to me.
"Dance?" He asked wearily.
"Yes. Dance."
"Erm... yeah sure... " He lied, pushing himself to me embarrassed, hitting Tre over the head as he walked past causing him to spill drink again.
If he felt awkward he only had to say, I knew he was only doing it for me, but I could tell that he obviously didn't want to. Not in front of Tre anyway.
"Come on," I smiled, taking his hand and heading towards the dance floor.
Billie Joe hesitated, not moving even when I tugged at his hand eagerly.
I turned back at him at looked at him questionably. "You don't wanna do you?"
He slowly nodded his head, gulping a little, before proceeding to shake his head in the negative.
"Is that a yes or a no?"
He replied awkwardly. "Both."
"Come on Billie Joe." I pleaded, swinging his hand with mine backwards and forwards.
"But I can't dance Stef!" He stretched his face with his moaning.
"And you think I can?" I mocked, laughing at the thought of me trying to dance.
He just looked at me before suddenly finding most interest in staring at his shoes.
"I can't dance to save my life Billie Joe but I'm not going to let that stop me. Not tonight anyway. I don't want to waste this chance."
Without saying anything, he swallowed back his reluctance at his incapability to dance; unlike those who were killing the music and the dance floor with their choreographed moves. He silently followed me as he let me drag him away from the table.
Well, we both couldn't dance - that was for sure, we both knew it. But once we were up there, we didn't give a dam. All that mattered was us and the music. Fast dance or slow, we worked our way through it.
"Oh yeah, I almost forgot." He recalled, stopping mid-dance and grabbing hold of me persuasively. "You still owe me the favor of joining me to the lavatory."
I looked up at him, smirking, mischief in his eyes.
He looked around carefully before bending and whispering in my ear, "And there just so happens to be one right over there."
He nodded his head in the direction to the left and my eyes followed, before turning back to face up to him.
"I'm not the one to turn down a bit of roughage."
He smiled, before biting his bottom lip, looking around. He leaned into me and grabbed hold of my hand, and like an excited school kid having nicked something, darted across the dance floor dragging me with him. I giggled excitedly as he voluntarily walked into the female toilets. I was just glad no one was in there at the time to see us. He threw me into a cubicle and closed the door behind us, grinning like a Cheshire cat. I giggled again, knowing that what we were doing was sneaky, and possibly the fact that maybe this was the moment I had been waiting for for a long time. I leaned against one of the walls to the cubicle, as he leaned against me, leaning on his hands that were propped up against the wall either side of my face. It was like he had pinned me. I gave him a look, a lustful one, not knowing what exactly was going to happen. Without waiting any more he pressed his lips against me, slipping me a bit of his tongue as I closed my eyes. Without opening my eyes to see what I was doing, I moved my right arm above and curled it around the back of his neck, drawing him closer to me as I felt the bottom scuffle of his disheveled hair. He drew his hands away from the wall, which left him pressing as much as he could against me, without depriving me from oxygen. I felt his hands slid down the sides of my body, resting upon my hips before one of them moved again but this time to cup my ass. God, physical contact or what? I raised my right leg and swung it over the back of his, drawing him even further against me, trying not to dig him with my heel. I arched my back slightly so we were resting at a slant against the wall. He stopped with the kissing and slowly, eying what he was doing, pulled the thin dress straps from off of my shoulders and left them hanging down my arms. Using his tongue he slowly worked down the side of my neck and then slowly down, causing the hairs on the back of my neck to rise. I grasped hold of the scruff of his neck tightly still, mostly holding hair as his head lowered. With the other hand free I sneakily moved it down towards his trousers without him noticing and grabbed hold of him, catching him off guard and causing him to bite on his own tongue in sudden shock and slobber over me a little. There was some 'Ew' factor behind the saliva that was now resting upon me, but I had other things in mind to think about. Much to his surprise I grabbed hold of him, swung him around and pinned him against the wall, standing in the exactly same position as he had against me; hands either side of his face and leaning against him, a seductive and sly look included. He looked startled, slightly shocked that now I was the one who was in control. I moved into him, kissing him passionately on the lips, before departing from them and moving down his neck, whilst unbuttoning the top of his black shirt, taking off his tie first and tucking it into his trouser pocket. I glided my hands down his chest before crouching down; my head now level with his trouser line. I looked up at him within the tops of my eyes, grinning mischievously with one idea in mind. I then proceeded to raise my hands to his belt, slowly starting to unbuckle it.
"Oh f-u-c-k... " he groaned, realizing what I was about to do.
I let his now un-hinged belt clatter either side of him, before moving onto the zip of his trousers. He let out a soft groan as I pulled the zip down, suddenly clasping his hand upon my head and pushing me down into a position, unable to control himself. I slowly pulled down his trousers, leaving them to rest on his bent thighs in the process of him being arched upon the wall of the cubicle. Again, he let out another moan as I moved my head forward, biting my bottom lip. Now all I had to do was take away the last item - his boxers. I gripped hold of the waist band, my fingers underneath the material before I made another split second choice to jump up and throw him onto the toilet seat, climbing on top of him; sitting with my legs wrapped around his. He looked at me surprised, never quite knowing where I was going to throw him next.
"God, you do like it all ways don't you?" He asked, supporting me around my back with his hands as I sat on him, as he sat on the toilet seat - trousers undone and my dress slipping off of me.
I leaned my arms forward, and supported myself holding onto the back of the toilet, trapping Billie Joe inside of my frame as he hoisted my dress up over my legs and left it to drape down my back and in between his own pair. He pressed me against him again and kissed me intense, my ponytail swaying from side to side. He grabbed hold of my ass once again and hoiked me up and resting me right on top of him, before pulling the remainders of my dress down over the top half of me, so it just left hanging in between his legs that were acting as a chair for me to sit backwards on, and my back. Billie Joe once again proceeded to lick me from my neck down the middle, causing me to catch my breath short as I felt his tongue against me. I moved my hand down and rubbed it around the top part of his leg, then taking hold of the elastic on his boxers once again and starting to roll them down. It was harder now he was sitting down and I was propped up on top of him. He started to move against me when there was a knock at our cubicle door, causing us both to suddenly stop everything and wait; Billie Joe looking at the door from the side of my figure, me sitting un top of him, still clasping hold of his boxers.
"Excuse me," a voice called from outside. "Can you hurry up in there please? I don't know what you are doing but SOME of us have been waiting a very long time."
She sounded crude and stuck up, slightly annoyed too.
"Erm... coming." I called back, stepping off of Billie Joe and pulling the rest of my dress back on over me, brushing myself down.
Billie Joe sat there still, with his trousers round his ankles, running his fingers through his spiky hair before standing up to put his trousers back on. He buttoned the top of his shirt back up and put back on his tie that I had stuffed in his pocket. I flushed the toilet to make it sound as if I had been doing nothing wrong. (Not that what we were doing was.) I slowly opened the door and walked out, my head bowed down.
"Oh at last!" The woman shrieked at me, rolling her eyes as I tried to hide my smirk. "What on earth have you been - "
She looked shockingly at Billie Joe who appeared out of the cubicle behind me, gob smacked. I bit my lip to hide my laughter and giggling.
"THAT'S what we've been doing." Billie Joe answered, smiling and winking at her before leaving her gob smacked.
She eyed us carefully, looking disgusted with us both, watching us walk out of the door, flabbergasted. W stumbled out of the door, looking as innocent as we could. When the door to the toilets finally close behind us and the batty old cow was out of earshot, we both burst into a fit of laughter. Billie Joe sniggered, looking back to laugh with me as he led us back onto the dance floor.
"God, did you see her face?" He spluttered, still not being able to control his laughter.
I nodded my head, as I couldn't speak, my sides hurting too much from laughing, tears swelling in my eyes.
"I bet she's just jealous," He added, waiting for me to be right next to him before we continued across the dance floor. "Just because she hasn't any - "
He humped the mid air as we walked, making me crease up even more as he moaned loudly, pretending to orgasm. I looked around to see if people were watching, telling him to quiet down as I tried to stop laughing.
"Come on Stef," he smiled, grabbing him suddenly and pressing me against him. "We don't need a toilet. We can do it right here and right now!"
I giggled in his arms, as he thrust himself forward, joking about.
"Billie - " I giggled, not being able to stop. "I - We can't... "
"Aww, why not?" He grinned, bending forward to my ear and moaning loudly in it. "I'll make it the best thing you've ever experienced."
His whispers made me shudder inside, and feel tingly all over. He took hold of my hands and clasped them together behind his neck, linking us together.
"I'm gonna fuck you right here and now whether you like it or not. Let the whole world see, I don't care." He whispered devishly again, pressing against me laughing, as he sent me staggering backwards, just as he lashed out to grab again as I knocked someone behind me.
"Sorry!" Billie Joe called out, pulling me back to him. "Sorry!"
"Oh it's ok." The woman said, smiling, turning away before swirling back to see if it was Billie Joe she had seen.
"Hey, it's you!" She gawped, smiling and coming closer, interrupting our fits of laughter.
She wore her hair in a twirling bun, curly strands of hair running over her forehead and down the sides of her face, supporting a blue velvet dress, looking ten times more suitable for the whole 'evening dinner awards' then I would ever cut out to be.
"Erm, yeah." Billie replied, standing up straight. "Billie Joe Armstrong."
He threw out his hand to shake hers, pulling me tight to him as I eyed her carefully.
"So what's your name then?" He asked, trying not to make the situation any harder as she shook his hand violently and tight, never letting go of him and shaking him about, grinning madly.
"Oh, I'm whatsername." She mocked, laughing hoarsely at her own joke and flattering herself as Billie Joe managed to laugh a little.
It sounded forceful - like she had planned to say that. I however, didn't do anything. I just stared at her, how awful was that? Not only was she trying to get into Billie's pants right in front of me, she had used American Idiot and used it in her bad taste. I wanted to throttle her. I watched besotted in between the pair of them, wanting to let rip. She had spoiled everything. I felt a certain angry monster inside of me, growling and wanting to be let free; it was ripping me up inside. I clenched Billie's hand tighter, but he didn't seem to notice as he was now in deep conversation with 'whatsername.' I now had another enemy, and a threat to what Billie Joe and I had left. Whatever we had surviving through the pain and suffering, the lies and tricks that had been thrown at us. My eyes seeped into her, but as much as I did, neither of them saw me doing so. They were too busy entangled in their conversation. Billie Joe put his hand in the air and half waved, smiling at her, like he had never smiled at me before.
"Ok, well I'll see you around then."
"Yeah sure." She smiled, before twirling around and walking back off to her partner.
Billie watched her, sort of in a trance as she swayed off, as I drew into Billie, clasping him tight.
"Yes, now fuck off." I said under my breath as we both watched her step-toe to the other side of the room.
"Hey!" Billie Joe said, turning his head round to face me. "That wasn't very nice was it?"
I just looked at him.
"Rachael was only being nice."
Being nice? Was Billie Joe blind? And oh god, he was using her name already as if he had known her for years.
"More like fuck you." I commented, turning around to stand the way Billie was standing.
"What?" He laughed. "Ok, that's going a bit too far don't you think?"
"I'm being serious Billie!" I whined, folding my arms across my chest. I then retreated to un-folding them again as he walked from me to another empty space on the dance floor.
The mood had changed completely. It was as if nothing had ever happened in the toilet - the rejection phase was happening again.
"I can tell. She was being more than nice. She wants to get in your pants."
He scoffed at this, turning around to face me in the middle of the dance floor, smiling to himself.
"And just how do you work that one out?"
"Because I can tell. I know the signs. Trust me. I'm a female too."
He laughed pitifully at me, rubbing his forehead with his hand. I walked over to him, whining and trying to make him understand. It obviously meant nothing to him. He probably had it all the time, but it was something about Rachel that just made me feel suspicious.
"As if I didn't know that already." He smiled, grabbing hold of my arm and pressing me up against him again as if to carry on dancing. "Come on Stef. You can trust me, right?"
I looked into his eyes, pausing. I trusted him with all my heart - It was HER I didn't trust.
"Of course I do Billie, it's just... just... "
"Just what?"
"I just think she's a little suspicious that's all."
"There's nothing to be worried about. Why would I go chasing after her when I've got it all here?"
He grinned as I suddenly felt his hand place upon my ass, making me smirk; reminding me of our latest counter in the toilet. It was then that I decided to play him at his own game, putting my hand to his crotch quickly for a few seconds. He smirked slightly alarmed at me, but only in a way that he was not expecting me to do that. I looked at him for a few seconds before he leaned in to kiss me softly on the lips. He didn't care if anyone saw.
"Now, why don't you go and sit down whilst I go get some drinks, eh?"
I pulled away from him, before smiling and reaching the table where Tre was sprawled out at - chilled and pretty much laid back. He looked kinda stoned.
"Hey, did ya' have a good time, wait... dancing was it?" He asked laughing, sitting laid back in his chair comfortably, cocktail glass in one hand.
"It was good until old 'whatsername' came over." I sighed turning my head back to catch a glance at where she had gotten to.
I hadn't taken in Tre's joke. Everything had been perfect, MORE than perfect before she came along. I couldn't think back to the good moments, she was overpowering them.
"Who?" Tre laughed slightly, quirking an eyebrow at me and smirking.
"Whatsername." I repeated, hating to hear the name.
Tre laughed out loud, sitting up straight and putting his glass to the table and turning to face me properly.
"Who the hec's whatsername?" He asked, waving one hand in the air as he sank back into his laid back position. "Apart from the chick on American Idiot."
"Oh just some - woman who bumped into us whilst we were dancing." I grunted, waving my hands in the air too in frustration and sitting down in the chair next to him. "I swear she done it on purpose."
"And let me guess, she wanted to jump into Billie's pants?"
"Jump?!" I squealed. "She wanted to jump right on top of him in the middle of the dance floor and fuck him right there."
"I knew it had to be something like that."
"What do you mean by that?" I asked, frowning at him.
"Well, it HAD to do something with Billie Joe didn't it? It always is with you Stef. That's all you get worked up about. I know how your mind works when it comes to him." Tre smiled knowingly, leaving me a little gob smacked.
"It's just... frustrating!" I cried, sinking into my chair further and resting my face in my hands that were propped up on my knees.
"I noticed." Tre reached over the table and took another sip from his drink, placing it back on the table as he sweetly licked his lips. "So, where's the old heart throb now then?"
"Tre," I whined, his calling of Billie a heart throb making me feel worse.
It was true, he was, but I was jealous if anyone else went near him. I just felt - manipulated, if that was the word.
"I'm only pissing you about Stef." He said, assuring me, placing his hand on my knee sympathetically. "So, where did he go to then?"
"To the bar to get some more drinks I think." I sighed, turning around on my chair, still slumped and looking along the bar to see if I could catch a glimpse of him.
Tre followed me, his eyes lining up and down the bar to see if he could see his pal, when his face screwed up a little in suspicion.
"Hey, don't tell me that's... her?" He asked, slapping me a little and nodding with his head towards someone at the bar.
I slowly crooked my head around and placed my arm on the back of the chair as I sat sideways. And sure as fucking hell there she was. Old whatsername, only standing at the bar with Billie Joe, AGAIN - seemingly chatting him up, fiddling with her soft long curly hair and smiling with a glint in her eye. Billie Joe casually smiled back at her, leaning on the bar with one arm, indulged within her and everything she said. It made my blood boil and rage inside. I sat there watching the pair of them, giving her the most evil look I could, my eyes piercing through her. It was mean, but she was stealing Billie Joe away from me. Well, that's what it felt like anyway. I watched as Billie Joe smiled at her before winking and collecting two drinks that had just arrived at the bar. He turned away and headed towards me and Tre, who were watching his every move. He smiled friendly as he approached us, as if nothing was going on, a drink in either hand.
"Here you go. A coke and Malibu just how you like it." He announced, placing the drink in glass in front of me on the table. "Hey, what's 'sup?"
He perched himself in the chair opposite Tre, looking at me a little concerned. I bet he knew deep down what was wrong with me - it was just an act.
I went to say something, but I stopped, only replying with a bleak,
"Nothing."
A pane of guilt went through me. After hearing his voice, it was hard to think that he would do anything to hurt me. Hec, we'd just nearly made the mark. After all, he was the one who had brought here to the Grammies, bought me a dress to wear, had paid to have my hair styled professionally, looked after me and had risked so much just to get me here. I couldn't doubt him. It was just so mean and cruel of me to do so. I caught Tre raising an eyebrow at me silently as I kept my mouth shut, instead taking a sip of my beverage as Billie leaned towards me and placed his hand on my knee, the other linking with mine. How could I possibly think he would do anything stupid, when he was so caring and was the loving and selfless person I loved to love so much?
"Tre over here! Tre! - Mike! - Mike and Tre! Over here! - Smile for me... oh my god we love you Tre and Mike! - It's Green Day! - Tre! Mike! Tre!"
The screams kept coming. It was a whirlwind of noise and cries.
I watched, stunned from inside the limo still, not wanting to move from the very spot I was sitting in. Billie Joe sighed deeply, twisting his body around on the leather positioning himself to move out onto the sidewalk with his fellow band mates.
"Here we go." He grumbled to me, before I suddenly shot my hand out and grabbed his arm before he could escape from the limo.
"Billie Joe!" I gasped, my eyes sharp and anxious.
He looked back on me, raising an eyebrow in suspension of my sudden outburst. I opened my mouth to say something but I couldn't. I mumbled my words.
"I... I - I can't."
"Can't what?"
He swung himself back round to stare straight back at me.
"Go out there." I croaked, my throat closing up from the immense pressure that was produced by my heart beating faster and faster, higher and higher.
"I'm - scared." I added, gulping and taking in every detail of his face.
"Come on Stef." He pleaded. "You can do this. I know you can."
He cupped his hands in mine, stroking them as he tried to calm me down.
"All you got to do is smile and wave. Nothing else. You don't even have to open your mouth and speak if you don't want to. Just leave it all to me. I have it all planned."
Screams and chants of 'Billie Joe! Billie Joe!' came from outside as Tre and Mike walked down the crowds of fans, singing autographs and posing for pictures. I looked outside, panic-stricken as the fans yelled for their favorite guitarist. Oh my god. Now I couldn't go outside. People would start hurling abuse at me, if they saw me with Billie Joe. Billie Joe looked at me with desperation, but smiling at me to try and make my nerves feel better.
"Come on. Thing's will get worse if we don't go now. People will get a lil' - suspicious."
As if they weren't already. The chanting grew louder and louder, demanding for Billie Joe to step out of the limo.
"Let's go." He told me, grabbing hold of my hand and leaning forward to move out of the limo.
"Billie Joe!" I gritted through my teeth, before he stepped out of the limo, dragging me with him.
What was he going to tell the media to as why I was with them? But I never got the chance to ask him as the next thing I knew he had dragged me out of limo and we were standing in front of a hundred flashing lights and screaming fans. Their roars echoed throughout, slightly deafening me and causing me to stagger back a little, but not noticeable. I looked about, the many faces of the crowd and media just blending into one. Like a little kid missing its mummy, I edged nearer Billie Joe wanting to feel some security. He waved to the crowd and the numerous media cameras, walking straight past them without stopping to say a few words, despite their cries and demands for photos or speeches. He caught up with Mike and Tre, me tailing behind him, before they headed inside.
"Sorry guys!" He called to the cameras and journalists, walking past. "Not tonight thanks."
"Who's this Billie Joe?" The media and paparazzi were shouting pointing at me and trying to grab his attention. "Billie! - Billie Joe!"
He simply turned around and smiled knowingly, as Tre and Mike took me up the steps and inside, like my bodyguards.
"Just a friend." Billie smiled. "A friend of Tre's."
Tre hastily turned around, looking at Billie, shocked as I was. That was his great plan?! But nothing more was said of it as we scrambled up the steps together, nerves getting the better of us. It wasn't that big of a problem I guess. Tre didn't mind. I think he liked the idea. The media and journalists protested to know more about me, calling out to Tre now, but were ignored completely by all of us.
We headed inside, the cameras and journalists following us through the door as far as they could before someone else came along and they focused on them.
* * * * * * * *
We sat in a row together, first Mike, Tre, then Billie Joe and I. I didn't sit between them, as then that would make it obvious I was with them. We had already been sitting her for an hour, already loosing out on two awards. But Green Day had a few fair chances left.
Billie Joe irritated, leaned towards me, before whispering something to me from out of the side of his mouth.
"I'm thinking of better things we could be doing then sitting here listening HIM mumble." He spoke, indicating towards the roundish figure on stage hosting the awards.
I had never even heard of the guy before. I was a bit startled that he had spoke. First of all we WERE in the middle of an awards show. We were supposed to be paying attention, especially with all the cameras darting past our faces every so often - it made me uncomfortable. My eyes remand staring at the stage.
"So can I."
He leaned back in towards me, his voice still quiet. "Wanna find a loo once we ditch this joint?"
I looked up at him, a mischievous glint in his eye. I smiled knowingly to him, many thoughts running through my head.
"I'm not going to refuse your offer of a bit of contact now am I Mr. Armstrong?" I simply replied, turning back to face the stage.
"By the way," he replied, now too transfixed on the same thing as I was. "You're gripping that armrest like its some sorta life preserver don't you think?"
I looked down at my clenched hands, instantly relaxing them at his mention.
"That's because I'm nervous for you." I remarked softly.
I stared at the stage - they were just about to announce the winner of the 'Best Rock Album' award.
"And the winner goes to... "
Ignoring what Billie Joe had just said, I instantly took hold of the armrest again and dug into it hard. I thought I heard Billie Joe take a slight inhale of breath as we waited in suspension whether they had actually done it this time.
"American Idiot! It's GREEN DAY!" The host roared, the cameras instantly flying over in our direction as the audience cheered.
Tre jumped out of his seat and punched the air, roaring loudly YES! Before the cameras could reach us, Billie snapped a quick peck upon my cheek, making me blush. Mike and Billie Joe stood up shortly after; lapping up the applause and cheers the audience were giving them.
Billie Joe straightened his jacket and brushed himself down smartly as he clambered over the row of people's legs to get out to go and collect the award, Mike and Tre already ahead of him. I watched in awe as the three of them waltzed up on stage, beaming to collect their award; Tre thrashing his fist in the air still in his excitement. I was so proud of them - I couldn't feel any happier for them. They walked up on stage to collect their gong as Aerosmith's Steven Tyler offered his hand suddenly to each of them to congratulate. I hadn't noticed him standing there before. I had been too occupied thinking about being in a toilet with Billie. From behind the podium, and holding the trophy a high, Billie Joe beamed down on the crowd.
"Rock 'n' Roll can be dangerous and fun at the same time." He said, as he picked up the band's award for best rock album. It was then that I realized that all of them were beaming uncontrollably, because it was then that they knew that American Idiot and all their hard work had finally been appreciated.
* * * * * * * *
It was only now, as I sat back on a chair at our table, admiring them all that I realized how much effort they had all put into their appearance tonight. Sporting dyed black hair and thick dark eyeliner (as always), Billie Joe had donned a skinny, black Dior suit for the special occasion. Mike and Tre too were wearing custom-made designer suits. It was a big leap from their old image, but was still really rock 'n' roll with a punk edge. After collecting their award, Green Day had ditched the ceremony feeling there was no need to stay, and had headed early towards the after party. But it was full already, even if most of the guests were still in the hall at the show. For a while now I had been watching the couples dance together on the floor, forgetting all their troubles and problems. It was my mission, I had decided to get Billie Joe to dance with me for at least one song tonight. Even if it did mean dragging him up there with me by his ankles. Tre sat opposite me at the table, laid back and slouched in his chair like he was a king or something. Billie Joe approached us, smiling after reappearing from having a fag outside.
"Hey," he said, smiling and walking towards us.
Tre titled his head in a slight nod that meant 'hey' back. I responded in a smile, before turning back to look at everyone together dancing. I was so desperate; I had to ask him now. Just looking at all the other couples made me long to be just like them with Billie. What I would give to him that with him. I would do anything. Besides, I had nothing else to really live for.
"Billie Joe?" I hesitated.
"Yeah?"
"You wanna dance?"
"Wah?!" He spluttered, shooting a look at me, Tre spluttering on his drink and spilling it everywhere in the thought of Billie Joe dancing.
He gave him an evil look, slightly red in the face before turning back to me.
"Dance?" He asked wearily.
"Yes. Dance."
"Erm... yeah sure... " He lied, pushing himself to me embarrassed, hitting Tre over the head as he walked past causing him to spill drink again.
If he felt awkward he only had to say, I knew he was only doing it for me, but I could tell that he obviously didn't want to. Not in front of Tre anyway.
"Come on," I smiled, taking his hand and heading towards the dance floor.
Billie Joe hesitated, not moving even when I tugged at his hand eagerly.
I turned back at him at looked at him questionably. "You don't wanna do you?"
He slowly nodded his head, gulping a little, before proceeding to shake his head in the negative.
"Is that a yes or a no?"
He replied awkwardly. "Both."
"Come on Billie Joe." I pleaded, swinging his hand with mine backwards and forwards.
"But I can't dance Stef!" He stretched his face with his moaning.
"And you think I can?" I mocked, laughing at the thought of me trying to dance.
He just looked at me before suddenly finding most interest in staring at his shoes.
"I can't dance to save my life Billie Joe but I'm not going to let that stop me. Not tonight anyway. I don't want to waste this chance."
Without saying anything, he swallowed back his reluctance at his incapability to dance; unlike those who were killing the music and the dance floor with their choreographed moves. He silently followed me as he let me drag him away from the table.
Well, we both couldn't dance - that was for sure, we both knew it. But once we were up there, we didn't give a dam. All that mattered was us and the music. Fast dance or slow, we worked our way through it.
"Oh yeah, I almost forgot." He recalled, stopping mid-dance and grabbing hold of me persuasively. "You still owe me the favor of joining me to the lavatory."
I looked up at him, smirking, mischief in his eyes.
He looked around carefully before bending and whispering in my ear, "And there just so happens to be one right over there."
He nodded his head in the direction to the left and my eyes followed, before turning back to face up to him.
"I'm not the one to turn down a bit of roughage."
He smiled, before biting his bottom lip, looking around. He leaned into me and grabbed hold of my hand, and like an excited school kid having nicked something, darted across the dance floor dragging me with him. I giggled excitedly as he voluntarily walked into the female toilets. I was just glad no one was in there at the time to see us. He threw me into a cubicle and closed the door behind us, grinning like a Cheshire cat. I giggled again, knowing that what we were doing was sneaky, and possibly the fact that maybe this was the moment I had been waiting for for a long time. I leaned against one of the walls to the cubicle, as he leaned against me, leaning on his hands that were propped up against the wall either side of my face. It was like he had pinned me. I gave him a look, a lustful one, not knowing what exactly was going to happen. Without waiting any more he pressed his lips against me, slipping me a bit of his tongue as I closed my eyes. Without opening my eyes to see what I was doing, I moved my right arm above and curled it around the back of his neck, drawing him closer to me as I felt the bottom scuffle of his disheveled hair. He drew his hands away from the wall, which left him pressing as much as he could against me, without depriving me from oxygen. I felt his hands slid down the sides of my body, resting upon my hips before one of them moved again but this time to cup my ass. God, physical contact or what? I raised my right leg and swung it over the back of his, drawing him even further against me, trying not to dig him with my heel. I arched my back slightly so we were resting at a slant against the wall. He stopped with the kissing and slowly, eying what he was doing, pulled the thin dress straps from off of my shoulders and left them hanging down my arms. Using his tongue he slowly worked down the side of my neck and then slowly down, causing the hairs on the back of my neck to rise. I grasped hold of the scruff of his neck tightly still, mostly holding hair as his head lowered. With the other hand free I sneakily moved it down towards his trousers without him noticing and grabbed hold of him, catching him off guard and causing him to bite on his own tongue in sudden shock and slobber over me a little. There was some 'Ew' factor behind the saliva that was now resting upon me, but I had other things in mind to think about. Much to his surprise I grabbed hold of him, swung him around and pinned him against the wall, standing in the exactly same position as he had against me; hands either side of his face and leaning against him, a seductive and sly look included. He looked startled, slightly shocked that now I was the one who was in control. I moved into him, kissing him passionately on the lips, before departing from them and moving down his neck, whilst unbuttoning the top of his black shirt, taking off his tie first and tucking it into his trouser pocket. I glided my hands down his chest before crouching down; my head now level with his trouser line. I looked up at him within the tops of my eyes, grinning mischievously with one idea in mind. I then proceeded to raise my hands to his belt, slowly starting to unbuckle it.
"Oh f-u-c-k... " he groaned, realizing what I was about to do.
I let his now un-hinged belt clatter either side of him, before moving onto the zip of his trousers. He let out a soft groan as I pulled the zip down, suddenly clasping his hand upon my head and pushing me down into a position, unable to control himself. I slowly pulled down his trousers, leaving them to rest on his bent thighs in the process of him being arched upon the wall of the cubicle. Again, he let out another moan as I moved my head forward, biting my bottom lip. Now all I had to do was take away the last item - his boxers. I gripped hold of the waist band, my fingers underneath the material before I made another split second choice to jump up and throw him onto the toilet seat, climbing on top of him; sitting with my legs wrapped around his. He looked at me surprised, never quite knowing where I was going to throw him next.
"God, you do like it all ways don't you?" He asked, supporting me around my back with his hands as I sat on him, as he sat on the toilet seat - trousers undone and my dress slipping off of me.
I leaned my arms forward, and supported myself holding onto the back of the toilet, trapping Billie Joe inside of my frame as he hoisted my dress up over my legs and left it to drape down my back and in between his own pair. He pressed me against him again and kissed me intense, my ponytail swaying from side to side. He grabbed hold of my ass once again and hoiked me up and resting me right on top of him, before pulling the remainders of my dress down over the top half of me, so it just left hanging in between his legs that were acting as a chair for me to sit backwards on, and my back. Billie Joe once again proceeded to lick me from my neck down the middle, causing me to catch my breath short as I felt his tongue against me. I moved my hand down and rubbed it around the top part of his leg, then taking hold of the elastic on his boxers once again and starting to roll them down. It was harder now he was sitting down and I was propped up on top of him. He started to move against me when there was a knock at our cubicle door, causing us both to suddenly stop everything and wait; Billie Joe looking at the door from the side of my figure, me sitting un top of him, still clasping hold of his boxers.
"Excuse me," a voice called from outside. "Can you hurry up in there please? I don't know what you are doing but SOME of us have been waiting a very long time."
She sounded crude and stuck up, slightly annoyed too.
"Erm... coming." I called back, stepping off of Billie Joe and pulling the rest of my dress back on over me, brushing myself down.
Billie Joe sat there still, with his trousers round his ankles, running his fingers through his spiky hair before standing up to put his trousers back on. He buttoned the top of his shirt back up and put back on his tie that I had stuffed in his pocket. I flushed the toilet to make it sound as if I had been doing nothing wrong. (Not that what we were doing was.) I slowly opened the door and walked out, my head bowed down.
"Oh at last!" The woman shrieked at me, rolling her eyes as I tried to hide my smirk. "What on earth have you been - "
She looked shockingly at Billie Joe who appeared out of the cubicle behind me, gob smacked. I bit my lip to hide my laughter and giggling.
"THAT'S what we've been doing." Billie Joe answered, smiling and winking at her before leaving her gob smacked.
She eyed us carefully, looking disgusted with us both, watching us walk out of the door, flabbergasted. W stumbled out of the door, looking as innocent as we could. When the door to the toilets finally close behind us and the batty old cow was out of earshot, we both burst into a fit of laughter. Billie Joe sniggered, looking back to laugh with me as he led us back onto the dance floor.
"God, did you see her face?" He spluttered, still not being able to control his laughter.
I nodded my head, as I couldn't speak, my sides hurting too much from laughing, tears swelling in my eyes.
"I bet she's just jealous," He added, waiting for me to be right next to him before we continued across the dance floor. "Just because she hasn't any - "
He humped the mid air as we walked, making me crease up even more as he moaned loudly, pretending to orgasm. I looked around to see if people were watching, telling him to quiet down as I tried to stop laughing.
"Come on Stef," he smiled, grabbing him suddenly and pressing me against him. "We don't need a toilet. We can do it right here and right now!"
I giggled in his arms, as he thrust himself forward, joking about.
"Billie - " I giggled, not being able to stop. "I - We can't... "
"Aww, why not?" He grinned, bending forward to my ear and moaning loudly in it. "I'll make it the best thing you've ever experienced."
His whispers made me shudder inside, and feel tingly all over. He took hold of my hands and clasped them together behind his neck, linking us together.
"I'm gonna fuck you right here and now whether you like it or not. Let the whole world see, I don't care." He whispered devishly again, pressing against me laughing, as he sent me staggering backwards, just as he lashed out to grab again as I knocked someone behind me.
"Sorry!" Billie Joe called out, pulling me back to him. "Sorry!"
"Oh it's ok." The woman said, smiling, turning away before swirling back to see if it was Billie Joe she had seen.
"Hey, it's you!" She gawped, smiling and coming closer, interrupting our fits of laughter.
She wore her hair in a twirling bun, curly strands of hair running over her forehead and down the sides of her face, supporting a blue velvet dress, looking ten times more suitable for the whole 'evening dinner awards' then I would ever cut out to be.
"Erm, yeah." Billie replied, standing up straight. "Billie Joe Armstrong."
He threw out his hand to shake hers, pulling me tight to him as I eyed her carefully.
"So what's your name then?" He asked, trying not to make the situation any harder as she shook his hand violently and tight, never letting go of him and shaking him about, grinning madly.
"Oh, I'm whatsername." She mocked, laughing hoarsely at her own joke and flattering herself as Billie Joe managed to laugh a little.
It sounded forceful - like she had planned to say that. I however, didn't do anything. I just stared at her, how awful was that? Not only was she trying to get into Billie's pants right in front of me, she had used American Idiot and used it in her bad taste. I wanted to throttle her. I watched besotted in between the pair of them, wanting to let rip. She had spoiled everything. I felt a certain angry monster inside of me, growling and wanting to be let free; it was ripping me up inside. I clenched Billie's hand tighter, but he didn't seem to notice as he was now in deep conversation with 'whatsername.' I now had another enemy, and a threat to what Billie Joe and I had left. Whatever we had surviving through the pain and suffering, the lies and tricks that had been thrown at us. My eyes seeped into her, but as much as I did, neither of them saw me doing so. They were too busy entangled in their conversation. Billie Joe put his hand in the air and half waved, smiling at her, like he had never smiled at me before.
"Ok, well I'll see you around then."
"Yeah sure." She smiled, before twirling around and walking back off to her partner.
Billie watched her, sort of in a trance as she swayed off, as I drew into Billie, clasping him tight.
"Yes, now fuck off." I said under my breath as we both watched her step-toe to the other side of the room.
"Hey!" Billie Joe said, turning his head round to face me. "That wasn't very nice was it?"
I just looked at him.
"Rachael was only being nice."
Being nice? Was Billie Joe blind? And oh god, he was using her name already as if he had known her for years.
"More like fuck you." I commented, turning around to stand the way Billie was standing.
"What?" He laughed. "Ok, that's going a bit too far don't you think?"
"I'm being serious Billie!" I whined, folding my arms across my chest. I then retreated to un-folding them again as he walked from me to another empty space on the dance floor.
The mood had changed completely. It was as if nothing had ever happened in the toilet - the rejection phase was happening again.
"I can tell. She was being more than nice. She wants to get in your pants."
He scoffed at this, turning around to face me in the middle of the dance floor, smiling to himself.
"And just how do you work that one out?"
"Because I can tell. I know the signs. Trust me. I'm a female too."
He laughed pitifully at me, rubbing his forehead with his hand. I walked over to him, whining and trying to make him understand. It obviously meant nothing to him. He probably had it all the time, but it was something about Rachel that just made me feel suspicious.
"As if I didn't know that already." He smiled, grabbing hold of my arm and pressing me up against him again as if to carry on dancing. "Come on Stef. You can trust me, right?"
I looked into his eyes, pausing. I trusted him with all my heart - It was HER I didn't trust.
"Of course I do Billie, it's just... just... "
"Just what?"
"I just think she's a little suspicious that's all."
"There's nothing to be worried about. Why would I go chasing after her when I've got it all here?"
He grinned as I suddenly felt his hand place upon my ass, making me smirk; reminding me of our latest counter in the toilet. It was then that I decided to play him at his own game, putting my hand to his crotch quickly for a few seconds. He smirked slightly alarmed at me, but only in a way that he was not expecting me to do that. I looked at him for a few seconds before he leaned in to kiss me softly on the lips. He didn't care if anyone saw.
"Now, why don't you go and sit down whilst I go get some drinks, eh?"
I pulled away from him, before smiling and reaching the table where Tre was sprawled out at - chilled and pretty much laid back. He looked kinda stoned.
"Hey, did ya' have a good time, wait... dancing was it?" He asked laughing, sitting laid back in his chair comfortably, cocktail glass in one hand.
"It was good until old 'whatsername' came over." I sighed turning my head back to catch a glance at where she had gotten to.
I hadn't taken in Tre's joke. Everything had been perfect, MORE than perfect before she came along. I couldn't think back to the good moments, she was overpowering them.
"Who?" Tre laughed slightly, quirking an eyebrow at me and smirking.
"Whatsername." I repeated, hating to hear the name.
Tre laughed out loud, sitting up straight and putting his glass to the table and turning to face me properly.
"Who the hec's whatsername?" He asked, waving one hand in the air as he sank back into his laid back position. "Apart from the chick on American Idiot."
"Oh just some - woman who bumped into us whilst we were dancing." I grunted, waving my hands in the air too in frustration and sitting down in the chair next to him. "I swear she done it on purpose."
"And let me guess, she wanted to jump into Billie's pants?"
"Jump?!" I squealed. "She wanted to jump right on top of him in the middle of the dance floor and fuck him right there."
"I knew it had to be something like that."
"What do you mean by that?" I asked, frowning at him.
"Well, it HAD to do something with Billie Joe didn't it? It always is with you Stef. That's all you get worked up about. I know how your mind works when it comes to him." Tre smiled knowingly, leaving me a little gob smacked.
"It's just... frustrating!" I cried, sinking into my chair further and resting my face in my hands that were propped up on my knees.
"I noticed." Tre reached over the table and took another sip from his drink, placing it back on the table as he sweetly licked his lips. "So, where's the old heart throb now then?"
"Tre," I whined, his calling of Billie a heart throb making me feel worse.
It was true, he was, but I was jealous if anyone else went near him. I just felt - manipulated, if that was the word.
"I'm only pissing you about Stef." He said, assuring me, placing his hand on my knee sympathetically. "So, where did he go to then?"
"To the bar to get some more drinks I think." I sighed, turning around on my chair, still slumped and looking along the bar to see if I could catch a glimpse of him.
Tre followed me, his eyes lining up and down the bar to see if he could see his pal, when his face screwed up a little in suspicion.
"Hey, don't tell me that's... her?" He asked, slapping me a little and nodding with his head towards someone at the bar.
I slowly crooked my head around and placed my arm on the back of the chair as I sat sideways. And sure as fucking hell there she was. Old whatsername, only standing at the bar with Billie Joe, AGAIN - seemingly chatting him up, fiddling with her soft long curly hair and smiling with a glint in her eye. Billie Joe casually smiled back at her, leaning on the bar with one arm, indulged within her and everything she said. It made my blood boil and rage inside. I sat there watching the pair of them, giving her the most evil look I could, my eyes piercing through her. It was mean, but she was stealing Billie Joe away from me. Well, that's what it felt like anyway. I watched as Billie Joe smiled at her before winking and collecting two drinks that had just arrived at the bar. He turned away and headed towards me and Tre, who were watching his every move. He smiled friendly as he approached us, as if nothing was going on, a drink in either hand.
"Here you go. A coke and Malibu just how you like it." He announced, placing the drink in glass in front of me on the table. "Hey, what's 'sup?"
He perched himself in the chair opposite Tre, looking at me a little concerned. I bet he knew deep down what was wrong with me - it was just an act.
I went to say something, but I stopped, only replying with a bleak,
"Nothing."
A pane of guilt went through me. After hearing his voice, it was hard to think that he would do anything to hurt me. Hec, we'd just nearly made the mark. After all, he was the one who had brought here to the Grammies, bought me a dress to wear, had paid to have my hair styled professionally, looked after me and had risked so much just to get me here. I couldn't doubt him. It was just so mean and cruel of me to do so. I caught Tre raising an eyebrow at me silently as I kept my mouth shut, instead taking a sip of my beverage as Billie leaned towards me and placed his hand on my knee, the other linking with mine. How could I possibly think he would do anything stupid, when he was so caring and was the loving and selfless person I loved to love so much?
