A Note Don't Come Easy, chapter 45

My mum and Billie Joe just seemed to stare at each other, before her eyes lingered back to me.

Come on, say something. Anything.

Billie Joe, trying to break the tension, slowly reached his hand out and offered it to her for her to shake, but she looked at before returning to snarl at his face.
"What the fuck do you want?" She hissed.
"I just want you to know that Stef's being taken great care of." Billie Joe tried making a conversation with her, that was somewhat subtle.
My mum looked me over.
"I bet she is."
She turned back to me.
"You have no idea what I've been through!"

Like I fucking care.

"Wondering where the hec' you are! I've had to put up with constant questions from your sisters considering your whereabouts."

Whatever.

"You have sisters?" Billie Joe suddenly asked, looking at me from over my shoulder and raising his left eyebrow.

Shut up Billie.

I nodded hastily, my mum smiling a little sarcastically at him.
"See, not so innocent as she seems is she Billie?"
I clenched my teeth together tight, like a cap pressed down on a container. So god dam hard I thought they were going to seize under the strain and crumble.

Don't you fucking DARE turn Billie Joe against me. Don't you fucking dare. Otherwise it will be my turn to use my fist for once.

Billie Joe just stared her out, mum biting her lip in slight remorse when he didn't reply or agree with her.
"I love Stef." He simply said, placing his hand on my shoulder.
She let out a cackle, sending a shiver down my spine.
"Well, isn't that sweet."
"I do, and I mean that. I want you to know that she's in safe hands, and we're taking good care of her."
"We?" She queried, narrowing her eyes.

Mother, don't act like the fucking innocent here. Don't show me up in front of him.

"Mike, Tre and I. And the rest of the band." Billie explained, keeping his cool.
"Well, doesn't that figure?!"

What the hell's that supposed to mean, huh?

I looked at her, not believing that this was happening at all. That Billie was having this conversation with my mum. It was enough to break me.
Billie Joe bit the inside of his cheek, his frustration levels rising - I could feel it in the way he was starting to twist and crunch my hand.
It was supposed to me that crushed his hand to pieces. Not him.
A silence fell among the three of us, a car outside being the only sound that met our ears.
There was just tension, and staring. Lots of it.
I turned to Billie, teary eyed and trying to hold myself together.
"I'm... gonna... erm, go to my room and pick up a few bits."
"Ok babes." He whispered.
Reluctant to let go of his hand, and turning my back, I slowly sauntered up the stairs, and not daring to look back.

I don't want to leave you Billie. Please don't leave me. I might never come back down. Please, please be here if I need you. Stay with me, don't let him get me. Please, please, please. I beg you. Don't let him get me.

Slipping up stairs and down the landing, I looked around - expecting him to jump out and grab me.
Suddenly running into my room and shutting the door, I stared at my walls, half bare and half not; from where I had taken half of my posters and pictures with me.

Billie Joe stood downstairs, slipping his hands into his front trouser pockets and smiling at my mum, who was still scowling at him.
"I do really love her." He tried to explain.
She looked him hard in the eye.
"I know what she's like. Don't let her force you into anything."
"She hasn't forced me into anything, and I haven't forced her if you want to know."
"I don't."
Billie pouted a little, clenching one of his fists together in his pocket.

I didn't think it would be this god damn hard,he thought.

"It might not look the most convincing thing, considering how things look, but... we're happy together."
"You sure?"
"Positive."
He nodded his head, trying to make her see sense that we were serious and that we were, like he had said, happy together.
"What do you want from me?" She suddenly blurted out, catching Billie a little off guard as he had been staring at the stained filled carpet.
"I want you to let her go."
She looked at him, curling her lip and thinking it over in her head.
"I want you to let her go, and never to bother her again. I want you to let her lead her life and let go of this wrath you have on her." He said, being more serious all of a sudden.
"Why are you so desperate for her?"
"I told you. I love her."
"No you don't. You just use her as your toy and when you're done, you'll just throw her away."
"I'm not a man whore."

You were vulnerable and stupid and he was a killer and a man whore.

"You're just using her, and abusing her!"
"Oh. What, you mean like Tom?" he sniped.
Mum's eyes widened very suddenly, rage building inside of her.
"I'm sorry?!"
"You know what," he started again, turning around fully to face. "It's people like you who make me made. People who make others turn inside and loose identity of themselves. Causing them to become so scared that they can't stick up for themselves sometimes. Enough to make them take their own lives."
"How dare you!" She screamed.
"How dare I what? Speak the truth Ann? Because I tell you what. I know a lot more than you think. A lot more."
He looked at her, cocking his head to the side and waiting for an answer.
"Don't you call me by my name."
"Ok then." He compromised cruelly. "What shall I call you then? Bitch? Because that sounds like a good name to me."
She threw her pointing finger at him.
"Get out!" She shrieked. "Get out of my house now! Don't you dare come in here and call me a bitch you shit!"
Billie's eyes narrowed as the woman started loosing her anger in front of him, pointing her finger here and there.
"Get out! Now!"
"Not until Stef's ready to go."
"I said get out!"
"I'm not leaving without her." He simply said, shrugging his shoulders and ignoring her deafening shrieks.
"I don't care! Get out now!"
"I," he began, hissing. "Am, not, leaving, without, her. Do you understand?"
"I won't let you." She growled, squaring up to him. "I won't let you take her."
"Oh, you will alright. And that's a fact. Her home's with me now. She's happy in America and we're happy together."
"I'm her mother!"
"And I'm her partner."
"You're nothing of the sort."
"Why do you actually care?" He inquired, loosing his rag a bit now.
"Because she's my daughter!"
"You didn't treat her like one though, did you?"
She looked at him, a little taken back and withdrawn.
"You try being a parent--"
"I am thanks."
"—to a stubborn little brat like her."
"You know, I came here to meet the parents of the person I'm in love with. She didn't have to come here, but she did because I wanted to meet you. And now I wished I hadn't bothered. Because I can't reason with you at all. I can't make you see how much we love each other, because you really don't give a shit. I wanted to ask you to give her away to me. I wanted to let you know how much I'm in love with her, and how much of a beautiful person she is. But I won't waste my fucking breath on you anymore."
He sighed, rubbing his temple with his hand before replacing it back into his trouser pocket.
She just stared at him, and even though he was staring at the floor, he knew she was doing it. Like burning holes into him with those eyes of hers.
I came down the stairs, almost running from my room in case Tom was around a corner.
"You ok?" Billie asked me as I stood before him at the bottom of the stairs, clutching a rucksack in my hand full of belongings I had collected from my room to take back with me.
I nodded my head, catching my breath. The suspense of not knowing where he was making me feel weak.
"You sure?" He asked, wanting assurance from me.
Nodding my head again, I bit my lip - avoiding any eye contact with my mum.
"Ok then, let's go. I think we're wasting our time. I should have listened to you more."
Placing his arm around me, we turned around to head out of the door.
"Bye mum." I muttered, looking at her one last time, probably forever, before turning to head out of the front door.
Suddenly, a cry came from the kitchen out the back - the door to it opening and a small figure running towards me.
"Stephanie!"
My 5 year old sister, Katie, ran towards me, clutching hold of my leg suddenly.
"Don't go." She pleaded.
Looking at her, guilt-ridden, I tried to shake her off.
"I... I can't Katie. I have to go. I can't stay here. Not anymore."
Crouching down at giving her a tight hug which she returned, my heart broke. Billie watched from behind us, sighing deeply and saddened at the scene.
"But remember that I'll always love you ok?" I told her, trying my best not to cry. "And we'll see each other again, some day. Try and stay out of trouble for me."
Nodding sadly, whilst hanging head, she started to whimper - killing me softly.
Mum walked towards her, picking her up and bringing her close to her.
"See what you're doing?" She hissed at me. "You're breaking her heart. You've ruined this family."

Don't say that.

"All you ever care about is yourself."

No I don't.

"We could have been such a nice family together, all of us. And you had to go and ruin it." She added. "How am I going to tell her when she's older that her sister ran away from us?"

Don't turn me into a bad person. You made me run away.

Katie whimpered again, rubbing her eyes with her podgy little hands as mum held onto her by the shoulders.
"You've ruined us all, and now we can never be a happy family. All because of ... him."
She indicated towards Billie Joe, nudging her head in his direction.
"I've had enough," I whimpered myself, turning around and opening the door.
Holding back my tears, Billie Joe followed close behind, looking back at them one last time.
"I'm just sorry it had to be like this." He muttered, twisting the doorknob and looking a little sorrow.
There was a moment's silence as they watched us go, before mum screamed the house.
"Tom!" She shrilled. "Tom!"
Turning around suddenly as panic set in at the sound of his name, my eyes widened as I froze. Billie suddenly turned too, looking out for him.
Suddenly, he loomed from out of the kitchen, slamming the door as he went. Meeting my eyes, we stared at one another, a lump rising in my throat as I pushed it back again.
Mum pointed directly at me, as Katie looked at us, un-aware that her daddy was standing behind, and was about to do something terrible.
Billie Joe stood a little in front of me for protection, his knuckles tightening around the doorknob still as he set eyes on my beater.
"Stop them!" Mum yelled at him, pointing at us. "Don't let them get away! She's running away again!"
Tom clicked his knuckles, forming a snarl and storming towards us.
My heart pounding, I backed against the door, falling numb all over and loosing any control over myself I had.
I just stood there, watching him head towards me.

Waiting for a punch.

"Go." Billie Joe suddenly told me, opening the door like a bullet and pushing me out. "Get in the car and lock the doors."
Without a moment's hesitation, I ran out of the door, running to the car like a streak of lightning as Billie shut it behind me.
He turned with his back against the door, facing Tom as he stormed towards him.
"Dude, what's your problem?" He asked. "Can't you just fucking leave her al--"

Smack.

Tom slammed his fist across Billie's jaw from the chin upwards, causing him to throw his head back and smack it against the smoke-effected window that was on the upper half to the front door.
Shaking his head at feeling nauseated, he put his hand to his jaw line, cradling it as it throbbed.
Before he could say another word, he looked up from dipping his head low, just to see Tom growl at him whilst pounding his fist into his stomach.
Letting out a cry, Billie Joe wriggled against the door, not being able to move as Tom's fist stayed there, pinning him.
The pain ripping through his stomach was so unbearable, closing his eyes as he winced unless he was staring at the ceiling, his eyes watering.
And it was impossible to fight back. The small lean man was nothing compared to the structure of Tom, who was built to be a rugby player. All muscle and strength - fists like a brick.
Clasping his hands around Tom's fist that was still in-bedded within his stomach, he tried to throw him off, pushing against the door as he did, clenching his teeth together and grunting.
Tom smirked. "That hurting you?"
Looking him in the eye whilst using all his strength to try and pull him away, Billie suddenly kicked him in the shins.
Letting out a groan, Tom let loose on his punch, looking down at where Billie had kicked him. His rage renewed, he pulled his fist out from Billie Joe's stomach, causing the guitarist to gasp for air from sudden release. His eye's rolled upwards, taking in deep breaths. Without a warning, Tom clasped his hand around Billie's neck, lifting him up off of the ground slightly and thudding him against the door.
"You, fucking, dick." He snarled, look at Billie who was turning purple from the strain around his neck.
Putting his hands once again around the fatter man's wrist, he tried to pull him away - only making things worse for him.
I sat in the car, my bag thrown in on the back seat and nervously waiting fro Billie to return.

Something's not right. He's been gone too long.

Turning to look at the door, my heart stopped as I saw the back of Billie, up against the door, and squirming.
"No!" I screamed, but knowing that no one was going to hear me. "Don't hurt him! Stop! Please!"
Slamming my hands against the car window, trying to make them hear me, I carried on screaming.
"Stop it! Don't hurt him! Tom!"
Inside the house, Tom threw a blow across Billie's face, the other hand still tightly around his neck.
Billie's head crashed against the glass, blood spilling out from his nose and mouth.
Letting out a groan, the blows kept coming to his face, until one point Tom wouldn't stop. Continuously throwing his fist into Billie's face, letting go of his grasp around his neck and letting him crumble to the floor in agony.
I watched from the car as Billie's figure disappeared from the window and onto the floor, where I watched Tom bend down and grab a hold of him around the shirt, hoisting him.
Pulling up the locks to the doors, I ran out of the car, the terror running through me.
"Don't you ever try coming near this house again." Tom snarled in Billie's ear, who still in the grasp of him. "You hear me?!"
Opening the front door, Tom threw Billie out onto the front steps, causing him to tumble onto his hands before crashing onto his side.
"Tom! Stop it!" I screamed, running towards them.
Billie Joe managed to look up, raising his head from off of the ground a little before limply shaking his hands at me.
"Don't... ." he puffed. "Go... don't... come, just - just leave... stay in...car..."
His desperate cries of warning were suddenly stopped though, when Tom booted him in the stomach again, causing him to wail as he rolled further down the path from my house.
"Tom! Stop it for fuck's sake! You're hurting him!" I screamed, running towards him and nursing to his side. "Leave him alone!"
Picking him up under the arms as he put his hand to his face to wipe some of the blood away, I dragged him back to the car, helping him to stand as he literally fell into the passanegr's seat.
"Oi! Come back here you little bitch!" He yelled, racing towards me as I was just about to jump into the driver's seat. "I'm not finished."
"Don't you dare fucking come near me!" I yelled acting quickly, so angry at him for beating the shit out of Billie. "You're a fucking bully you know that? All my life I've been scared of you, frightened you were going to beat me up. And you did. But not anymore. I'm leaving and I'm not fucking coming back, and I'm glad. I'm not the one who's ruined this family, it's you! And now all I can think of is how fucking good it's gonna be never having to set my eyes on you again! So you better find someone else to beat up Tom, fly your fist at some else you dick."
I suprised myself at what I was actually saying to him. But I was just so angry that he had hurt Billie that my mouth threw abuse at him.
His face full of rage and about to run round the car towards me, I hoped in and locked the doors just in time, turning on the ignition.
I couldn't drive, but I had to get away. I knew enough to get us far enough away from them.
"You little whore! Get the fuck out and let me beat the shit out of you!"
Tom slammed the door to the car hard, kicking the wheel and banging on the window with his fists as I pressed the exhilerator and drove off, leaving him to shout at me from where he was standing.
With my heart pounding, I managed to get us far enough in the car before I stopped, slamming the brakes down and swallowing back a lump in my throat.
After a few minutes of silence, I turned to Billie, cupping the side of his face, looking at him and not being able to grasp what had just happened. With blood staining his face, he slowly closed his eyes before letting me kiss him softly on the lips.

And I never wanted either of us to have to go through that ever again.