Boulevard of Broken Dreams, chapter 1
Billie's P. O. V.
This happens every year, I go home for Christmas and my mom always ends up putting either a knife to my throat or a gun to my head. I am used to it by now, but it still scares me. Sometimes I wish she wouldn't take all her emotions and problems out on me. She still get's very emotional about my dad passing away. I guess she's just so lonley, dad's gone all the kids have moved out and all she has left is a cat. I am the only one of all my brothers and sisters who bother with visiting her, they're all too afraid of what she may do, considering that they all know how she does me. So this visit wasn't anything outside the ordinary, she pulled the knife out on me and said something that repeated itself over and over in my head. "Your the worst stupid mistake I ever made, I never wanted to have you, it was all your dad's fault. He was the one who wanted another kid, NOT ME." That was the words that really affected me. I mean I have taken alot of shit lately and this has just put the icing on this shitty cake, knowing I was a mistake. Apparently mom's not the only one who think's that, Adie think's it too, I mean not even 3 months ago she took the kids and left without a trace. No phone number, no address, not a fucking thing. All I got was a note writting on the back on a recipt that said...
Billie,
I'm sorry, I can't take this relationship anymore. You are never home for me or the kids. I know your out on tour right now and I know this will be very devestating for you to read once you return supossitly in the next couple of weeks. So I am taking the kids out of you life permentatly.
Good Bye,
Adrienne
Just thinking about my wife and kids no longer in my life just made me cry, mom was still screaming something about me being an embarressment to the family when I just left. I walked out of the house for her myself to no longer be the biggest mistake of her life. I sat in my car in the looked in the rear-veiw mirror at myself for a few minutes, thinking. The only thing I have in my life is my band, and that hasn't even been going good, latley Mike and Tre' both say that I am selfish and don't won't to listen to their opinions.
This happens every year, I go home for Christmas and my mom always ends up putting either a knife to my throat or a gun to my head. I am used to it by now, but it still scares me. Sometimes I wish she wouldn't take all her emotions and problems out on me. She still get's very emotional about my dad passing away. I guess she's just so lonley, dad's gone all the kids have moved out and all she has left is a cat. I am the only one of all my brothers and sisters who bother with visiting her, they're all too afraid of what she may do, considering that they all know how she does me. So this visit wasn't anything outside the ordinary, she pulled the knife out on me and said something that repeated itself over and over in my head. "Your the worst stupid mistake I ever made, I never wanted to have you, it was all your dad's fault. He was the one who wanted another kid, NOT ME." That was the words that really affected me. I mean I have taken alot of shit lately and this has just put the icing on this shitty cake, knowing I was a mistake. Apparently mom's not the only one who think's that, Adie think's it too, I mean not even 3 months ago she took the kids and left without a trace. No phone number, no address, not a fucking thing. All I got was a note writting on the back on a recipt that said...
Billie,
I'm sorry, I can't take this relationship anymore. You are never home for me or the kids. I know your out on tour right now and I know this will be very devestating for you to read once you return supossitly in the next couple of weeks. So I am taking the kids out of you life permentatly.
Good Bye,
Adrienne
Just thinking about my wife and kids no longer in my life just made me cry, mom was still screaming something about me being an embarressment to the family when I just left. I walked out of the house for her myself to no longer be the biggest mistake of her life. I sat in my car in the looked in the rear-veiw mirror at myself for a few minutes, thinking. The only thing I have in my life is my band, and that hasn't even been going good, latley Mike and Tre' both say that I am selfish and don't won't to listen to their opinions.
Page 1/12 | Next
