Love lasts not only in life but in death, chapter 3
Jem screamed and dropped to the floor. Her heart and soul had been ripped out of her. She continued screaming as the doctor removed the monitors from him. Billie spoke words of comfort to her as he rocked her in his arms, but they fell on deaf ears. Jem stood, still crying and walked to the still life on the bed. She picked him up in her arms with all the care in the world and kissed his forehead. A tear dropped onto his cheek.
"Be safe. Go to nana she will take care of you now. Never forget me or daddy. You will always be remembered."
Another tear fell and Jem lay him back down. She opened the door and left Billie to say his goodbyes. When he came out Jem was sat on the floor shaking and sobbing violently. He picked her up and enveloped her. They looked back one final time at their son and walked away slowly.
Once they were back home it was getting late so Jem went to bed. Ollie went home and Billie looked in on the kids. He promised he would never let anything happen to them or Jem. He heard the door open so he went to check it out. Mike. He embraced his best friend then broke down in tears. He had to explain everything as Jem and he had just left. Mike sat and listened carefully.
"I'm so sorry. Where's Jem?"
"She's in bed. I'm worried about her Mike I don't know how she is gonna cope."
The pair sat in silence before Billie said goodnight and went upstairs again.
He undressed and got in beside Jem. She was still awake, sobbing. He lay there not wanting to disturb her but she rolled over and faced him.
"Hold me." Was all she said and with that Billie wrapped her up in his arms and held her tightly. He caressed the skin on her back and kissed her head. Sleep overtook Jem where her dreams where turned into nightmares. She awoke dripping in a cold sweat when she suddenly remembered. She grabbed her dressing gown and wandered down the hall to his room and found an empty cot. She crumbled to the floor. The harsh reality sinking deep down within her. She had lost him forever. Never to return. After half an hour of crying newly found tears Jem returned to bed.
Three days had passed and Jem had not eaten, drunk or slept for 72 hours. Billie had arranged Gerard's funeral with Jess, Tre and Mikes help. For Jem the pain would be too unbearable and she would have to finally face life without her beloved baby. After another day of no food or sleep, Billie called a doctor out to visit Jem. He took blood samples and could Jem was very unhealthy. He gave her sleeping tablets and other tablets that would restore her vitamins.
The doctor had left and Billie brought Jem a glass of water, who had lain in bed for 4 days solid, without sleeping, just crying or staring into space. He gave her a tablet and soon she was asleep. Billie lay next to her and watched her sleep, he carefully stroked her hair and kissed her forehead.
The morning of Gerard's funeral had arrived. August 14th. The same day as her nana's funeral. Billie woke Jem early so she could be prepared. He, along with Anna took the kids to school and nursery and was back in time for the hearse. Billie never let go of Jem's hand as they walked to the church and sat down. Jess, Tre and Mike sat beside them.
The priest took the service and soon it was time to enter the cemetery. Billie Joe, Tre and Mike carried the small black coffin outside. Jem and Jess followed. Jess holding Jem as if she walked by herself she would snap, she had lost so much weight. They got outside and met the rain. The raindrops merging with Jems own tears as she walked. They reached the burial site and the guys lowered the coffin. Jem screamed at the priest not to take her baby away and to take her instead. Billie cradled her as her sobs overflowed. The coffin was finally lowered and Jem clung onto Billie's jacket never losing her grip even though she was soaking through. She turned her head away as the mud was scattered over the coffin that contained their beautiful baby boy. Billie began to cry as Jems own became unbearable.
Everyone had left the cemetery and were on their way back to Billie Joe and Jem's for the wake. Jem and Billie Joe arrived last and Jem went straight upstairs. She went into Gerard's room, took his blanket and sat on the floor, wrapping herself up in it. After 20mins she went back downstairs to meet the people that were there. She went into the kitchen and stared out the window. Billie came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her. She turned around, tears falling from her already bloodshot eyes. He kissed her lips softly and Jem returned it. They were interrupted from their embrace when Mike came in. They broke apart and Mike gave Jem a hug. He spoke words of sympathy and she smiled weakly. As she hugged Mike she saw a knife lying on the counter.
Billie and Mike went outside for a fag and Jem was left on her own. She took the knife after contemplating for 5 minutes. She went straight upstairs ignoring everyone in her way and sat on the edge of her bed. She stared at the knife thinking about what she was going to do. She let fresh tears break through but cried silently. She brought the blade to her arm, ready for the pain. She ran it along gently, even so it she was overwhelmed by the sharpness of it, leaving a line as to where she was going to cut.
"One... two... "
"Be safe. Go to nana she will take care of you now. Never forget me or daddy. You will always be remembered."
Another tear fell and Jem lay him back down. She opened the door and left Billie to say his goodbyes. When he came out Jem was sat on the floor shaking and sobbing violently. He picked her up and enveloped her. They looked back one final time at their son and walked away slowly.
Once they were back home it was getting late so Jem went to bed. Ollie went home and Billie looked in on the kids. He promised he would never let anything happen to them or Jem. He heard the door open so he went to check it out. Mike. He embraced his best friend then broke down in tears. He had to explain everything as Jem and he had just left. Mike sat and listened carefully.
"I'm so sorry. Where's Jem?"
"She's in bed. I'm worried about her Mike I don't know how she is gonna cope."
The pair sat in silence before Billie said goodnight and went upstairs again.
He undressed and got in beside Jem. She was still awake, sobbing. He lay there not wanting to disturb her but she rolled over and faced him.
"Hold me." Was all she said and with that Billie wrapped her up in his arms and held her tightly. He caressed the skin on her back and kissed her head. Sleep overtook Jem where her dreams where turned into nightmares. She awoke dripping in a cold sweat when she suddenly remembered. She grabbed her dressing gown and wandered down the hall to his room and found an empty cot. She crumbled to the floor. The harsh reality sinking deep down within her. She had lost him forever. Never to return. After half an hour of crying newly found tears Jem returned to bed.
Three days had passed and Jem had not eaten, drunk or slept for 72 hours. Billie had arranged Gerard's funeral with Jess, Tre and Mikes help. For Jem the pain would be too unbearable and she would have to finally face life without her beloved baby. After another day of no food or sleep, Billie called a doctor out to visit Jem. He took blood samples and could Jem was very unhealthy. He gave her sleeping tablets and other tablets that would restore her vitamins.
The doctor had left and Billie brought Jem a glass of water, who had lain in bed for 4 days solid, without sleeping, just crying or staring into space. He gave her a tablet and soon she was asleep. Billie lay next to her and watched her sleep, he carefully stroked her hair and kissed her forehead.
The morning of Gerard's funeral had arrived. August 14th. The same day as her nana's funeral. Billie woke Jem early so she could be prepared. He, along with Anna took the kids to school and nursery and was back in time for the hearse. Billie never let go of Jem's hand as they walked to the church and sat down. Jess, Tre and Mike sat beside them.
The priest took the service and soon it was time to enter the cemetery. Billie Joe, Tre and Mike carried the small black coffin outside. Jem and Jess followed. Jess holding Jem as if she walked by herself she would snap, she had lost so much weight. They got outside and met the rain. The raindrops merging with Jems own tears as she walked. They reached the burial site and the guys lowered the coffin. Jem screamed at the priest not to take her baby away and to take her instead. Billie cradled her as her sobs overflowed. The coffin was finally lowered and Jem clung onto Billie's jacket never losing her grip even though she was soaking through. She turned her head away as the mud was scattered over the coffin that contained their beautiful baby boy. Billie began to cry as Jems own became unbearable.
Everyone had left the cemetery and were on their way back to Billie Joe and Jem's for the wake. Jem and Billie Joe arrived last and Jem went straight upstairs. She went into Gerard's room, took his blanket and sat on the floor, wrapping herself up in it. After 20mins she went back downstairs to meet the people that were there. She went into the kitchen and stared out the window. Billie came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her. She turned around, tears falling from her already bloodshot eyes. He kissed her lips softly and Jem returned it. They were interrupted from their embrace when Mike came in. They broke apart and Mike gave Jem a hug. He spoke words of sympathy and she smiled weakly. As she hugged Mike she saw a knife lying on the counter.
Billie and Mike went outside for a fag and Jem was left on her own. She took the knife after contemplating for 5 minutes. She went straight upstairs ignoring everyone in her way and sat on the edge of her bed. She stared at the knife thinking about what she was going to do. She let fresh tears break through but cried silently. She brought the blade to her arm, ready for the pain. She ran it along gently, even so it she was overwhelmed by the sharpness of it, leaving a line as to where she was going to cut.
"One... two... "
