Stupid Billie, chapter 6
" Ouch. Ouch. Ouch." Billie said as he stabbed himself with a needle multiple times.
" It doesn't hurt that much." Caitlin said finishing her project.
" Damn." Billie whispered.
" You're such a baby." Caitlin said rolling her eyes.
" Well usually I buy new clothes, instead of repairing them myself." Billie said. " I bet ya this'll work." He placed his pink and green fabric on his leg and used his arm to keep it in place.
" Tell me again why you picked pink and green?" Caitlin asked.
Billie looked at her. " Cause they're pretty colors."
The bell rang. " Come on. We have history next." Caitlin said getting up.
" Okay." Billie stood up. Oddly he was looking at the floor. " Umm", this is so freakin" screwed up!"
" Billie! What did you do?!?" Caitlin yelled.
" I dunno." He answered looking up at her.
Caitlin grabbed a pair of scissors off the table. " Stand still."
" NO WAY! This is my favorite shirt!" Billie argued.
" Fine then walk around like that all day." Caitlin said walking away.
" Wait! You can"t just leave me like this!" Billie said sort of running after her.
" Yes I can." Caitlin said smiling.
" Fine. Cut away." Billie shut his eyes and heard a bad ripping noise. He reopened his eyes and saw that Caitlin had made a huge rip on his pants and his shirt. " What the hell?"
" Oops." Caitlin said.
" What ever." Billie said walking toward their lockers.
" How many times do I hafta apologize?" Billie heard Bam say.
" Not enough times." Sami said, getting really annoyed.
" What the hell happened to you?" Sami asked Billie when she saw his shirt and pants.
" Making memories, that's what. And speak for yourself." Billie said pointing out her yellow converse, blue and red skirt and red shirt and hair.
" Take one guess." Sami said opening her locker.
" Bam!" Billie said whacking him across the head.
" I said I was sorry." Bam said rubbing the spot on his head Billie had hit.
" Yea but ya didn't mean it." Billie said.
" Yeah whatever shorty." Bam said laughing.
" Holy shit." Mike said as he and a pissed off Veronica walked up.
" Don"t ask." Thea said.
" Wasn"t gonna." Mike said.
" Veronica what did he do?" Thea asked a pissed off Veronica.
" He got me detention that's what!" Veronica said.
" Mike!" Billie said whacking him over the head.
" Yea Mike! What the hell is wrong with you?" Tre said slapping him across the head.
" He kept opening porn sites. And got a detention for that. And then I got a detention for swearing at him the whole time." Veronica said whacking him in the same place Billie and Tre had.
" Oww! What do you people have against my head!?!?" Mike shouted.
Ring. " Oh shit the bell." Caitlin said grabbing Billie"s arm and dragging him down the hall. Sami and Bam followed.
" Mr. Armstrong and Mr. Margera. You're late on your first day." Ms Brodeur said.
" Mr. Margera is my father a name. Name's Brandon." Bam said sitting sit a desk in the back of the class.
" And what are your excuses? And why are you covered in paint?" Ms. Brodeur asked Caitlin and Sami.
" Ummm I couldn't get my locker open?" Caitlin said.
" Wrong answer. You can see me after school." Ms. Bordeur said. " And what about the paint?" She said turning to Sami.
" Long story short, Bam did it." Sami said sitting at her desk.
"And who is Bam?"
"Me!" Bam said, jumping up and down.
Ms. Brodeur turned to Sami. "Why is there a full grown man in my class?"
Sami just shrugged and shook her head in annoyance.
Meanwhile...
Veronica didn't get math. Veronica hated her math teacher. Not a good combination.
"Mike! Save me!"
"Okay. It's really simple. All you do is take the powers and add them together, then multiply the number like this."
"I don't get it... "
He explained again. "Just add the powers together."
"Huh?"
"Add the fucking powers!"
"I don't get it. Why?"
"Because I fucking say so!" Mike shouted, jumping out of his seat.
"... Mike!" Mrs. Baughman scolded. "I do not want to hear that sort of language ever again! Down to the office right now!"
"But she-"
"Office!"
"Stupid fucking teacher... What's so offensive about the word fuck?" Mike mumbled. He unhappily trudged to the office, scowling.
"But wait!" Veronica called after him. "I still don't get it!"
Thea was sitting in science. Doing math. She detested math. Why do math in science anyway?
Tre had somehow become her partner, and was trying to copy off her sheet.
"Stop it!" She told him, whacking the back of his head.
"Aww, come on, just a peak?" He begged. "I'm not good at this stuff."
"Neither am I, but at least I'm trying." She grumbled. Conversions made her grumpy.
"Hey, lighten up." He said, putting his arm around her. "You're so much cuter when you smile."
She glared at him for a minute, then removed his hand and moved away. "Pervert..."
"I'm serious," he said. "You and your friends are all really cute."
"You're just saying that in the hope that you'll get laid." She said. "Tsk, tsk."
He sat back and crossed his arms. "Can't anyone take a compliment these days? First Sami and her drawing now you..."
She laughed. "What are you, a guidance counselor?"
"Say what?"
"Can't anyone take a compliment these days?" She repeated. "You sound so disappointed."
"No... I mean... What's a guidance counselor?"
Thea stared at him. "You're fucking kidding."
"No really, what is it?"
She burst out laughing. "Holy shit you don't know!"
Mrs. Eppley looked up from the papers she was correcting. "Is there something you want to share with the class?"
"Oh yes!" Thea said, wiping tears out of her eyes. "Tre doesn't know what a guidance counselor is!"
"I see. Maybe you should introduce him to one then."
"Right now?" She looked confused.
"Yes, now. You can do this for homework."
"What?"
"Go, go."
Thea dragged Tre out of the room. "Look what you did!"
"What I did?"
"Now we have homework! You idiot! Whatever... Let's go down to the office then..."
" It doesn't hurt that much." Caitlin said finishing her project.
" Damn." Billie whispered.
" You're such a baby." Caitlin said rolling her eyes.
" Well usually I buy new clothes, instead of repairing them myself." Billie said. " I bet ya this'll work." He placed his pink and green fabric on his leg and used his arm to keep it in place.
" Tell me again why you picked pink and green?" Caitlin asked.
Billie looked at her. " Cause they're pretty colors."
The bell rang. " Come on. We have history next." Caitlin said getting up.
" Okay." Billie stood up. Oddly he was looking at the floor. " Umm", this is so freakin" screwed up!"
" Billie! What did you do?!?" Caitlin yelled.
" I dunno." He answered looking up at her.
Caitlin grabbed a pair of scissors off the table. " Stand still."
" NO WAY! This is my favorite shirt!" Billie argued.
" Fine then walk around like that all day." Caitlin said walking away.
" Wait! You can"t just leave me like this!" Billie said sort of running after her.
" Yes I can." Caitlin said smiling.
" Fine. Cut away." Billie shut his eyes and heard a bad ripping noise. He reopened his eyes and saw that Caitlin had made a huge rip on his pants and his shirt. " What the hell?"
" Oops." Caitlin said.
" What ever." Billie said walking toward their lockers.
" How many times do I hafta apologize?" Billie heard Bam say.
" Not enough times." Sami said, getting really annoyed.
" What the hell happened to you?" Sami asked Billie when she saw his shirt and pants.
" Making memories, that's what. And speak for yourself." Billie said pointing out her yellow converse, blue and red skirt and red shirt and hair.
" Take one guess." Sami said opening her locker.
" Bam!" Billie said whacking him across the head.
" I said I was sorry." Bam said rubbing the spot on his head Billie had hit.
" Yea but ya didn't mean it." Billie said.
" Yeah whatever shorty." Bam said laughing.
" Holy shit." Mike said as he and a pissed off Veronica walked up.
" Don"t ask." Thea said.
" Wasn"t gonna." Mike said.
" Veronica what did he do?" Thea asked a pissed off Veronica.
" He got me detention that's what!" Veronica said.
" Mike!" Billie said whacking him over the head.
" Yea Mike! What the hell is wrong with you?" Tre said slapping him across the head.
" He kept opening porn sites. And got a detention for that. And then I got a detention for swearing at him the whole time." Veronica said whacking him in the same place Billie and Tre had.
" Oww! What do you people have against my head!?!?" Mike shouted.
Ring. " Oh shit the bell." Caitlin said grabbing Billie"s arm and dragging him down the hall. Sami and Bam followed.
" Mr. Armstrong and Mr. Margera. You're late on your first day." Ms Brodeur said.
" Mr. Margera is my father a name. Name's Brandon." Bam said sitting sit a desk in the back of the class.
" And what are your excuses? And why are you covered in paint?" Ms. Brodeur asked Caitlin and Sami.
" Ummm I couldn't get my locker open?" Caitlin said.
" Wrong answer. You can see me after school." Ms. Bordeur said. " And what about the paint?" She said turning to Sami.
" Long story short, Bam did it." Sami said sitting at her desk.
"And who is Bam?"
"Me!" Bam said, jumping up and down.
Ms. Brodeur turned to Sami. "Why is there a full grown man in my class?"
Sami just shrugged and shook her head in annoyance.
Meanwhile...
Veronica didn't get math. Veronica hated her math teacher. Not a good combination.
"Mike! Save me!"
"Okay. It's really simple. All you do is take the powers and add them together, then multiply the number like this."
"I don't get it... "
He explained again. "Just add the powers together."
"Huh?"
"Add the fucking powers!"
"I don't get it. Why?"
"Because I fucking say so!" Mike shouted, jumping out of his seat.
"... Mike!" Mrs. Baughman scolded. "I do not want to hear that sort of language ever again! Down to the office right now!"
"But she-"
"Office!"
"Stupid fucking teacher... What's so offensive about the word fuck?" Mike mumbled. He unhappily trudged to the office, scowling.
"But wait!" Veronica called after him. "I still don't get it!"
Thea was sitting in science. Doing math. She detested math. Why do math in science anyway?
Tre had somehow become her partner, and was trying to copy off her sheet.
"Stop it!" She told him, whacking the back of his head.
"Aww, come on, just a peak?" He begged. "I'm not good at this stuff."
"Neither am I, but at least I'm trying." She grumbled. Conversions made her grumpy.
"Hey, lighten up." He said, putting his arm around her. "You're so much cuter when you smile."
She glared at him for a minute, then removed his hand and moved away. "Pervert..."
"I'm serious," he said. "You and your friends are all really cute."
"You're just saying that in the hope that you'll get laid." She said. "Tsk, tsk."
He sat back and crossed his arms. "Can't anyone take a compliment these days? First Sami and her drawing now you..."
She laughed. "What are you, a guidance counselor?"
"Say what?"
"Can't anyone take a compliment these days?" She repeated. "You sound so disappointed."
"No... I mean... What's a guidance counselor?"
Thea stared at him. "You're fucking kidding."
"No really, what is it?"
She burst out laughing. "Holy shit you don't know!"
Mrs. Eppley looked up from the papers she was correcting. "Is there something you want to share with the class?"
"Oh yes!" Thea said, wiping tears out of her eyes. "Tre doesn't know what a guidance counselor is!"
"I see. Maybe you should introduce him to one then."
"Right now?" She looked confused.
"Yes, now. You can do this for homework."
"What?"
"Go, go."
Thea dragged Tre out of the room. "Look what you did!"
"What I did?"
"Now we have homework! You idiot! Whatever... Let's go down to the office then..."
