Billie is my mom?!?!, chapter 4
"Come on Tre tell us... What does Mike do in a bubble bath?" asked Rebecca.
"Ok, see when anything reminds Mike of friction in the pants his man downstairs wants some movement, and since he has no one around here to do that for him he has to do it himself," answered Tre.
"Aww dude your dad jacked off in your tub," said Lorie.
"Hey that's half dad," laughed Stef.
"And I witnessed it," Keirstin cringed.
"Guys, it not just jacking off like a normal person would do, Mike here makes a whole event out of it, basically a little play, oh and he likes to go hairless before he starts. Mike gets clean shaven down there," Billie explained.
"Wait a minute, how do you guys know this?" asked Lorie.
"Uhh!" Billie and Tre said at the same time.
Billie and Tre looked nervously at each other. Mike cocked his eyebrow. Rebecca and Lorie were almost laughing hysterically. Stef was speechless thinking of how she was having this conversation with her transvestite mother, father, and half father. And Keirstin was horrified at what she was learning about what she had walked in on.
"Ha, little horny perv stalkers" laughed Rebecca.
"Ok lets get off this topic before it gets any stranger," said Stef.
"I really don't think it is possible for this conversation to get any stranger," replied Keirstin.
"I like to suck cheese whiz out of a tube," said Tre.
"And I'm wrong," laughed Keirsten.
"You wish you had my talents to make things awkward," said Tre.
"Oh yah Tre I am so jealous of your amazing abilities," Keirstin said sarcastically.
***A Few Hours Later***
"I'm bored," Tre whined in a high pitched squeal.
"Hey, Tre you wanna do me a favour since you're bored?" Mike asked.
"No Mike, I'm not gonna suck your dick and play handball with your nuts again."
"No retard, I was going to say go out and buy some booze."
"Mike, how many times do I have to tell you, I will not be allowed to be liquored up and taken advantage by you, the 4 experiences were enough."
"Tre, just go out and buy some booze."
"Fine, but only cuz I'm bored out of my mind."
Billie got up to go to the washroom and Tre sneaked up and tackled him as hard as he could.
"Ha fucker, I told you I would get you back for throwing that drywall at my face" Tre said as he rolled off of Billie.
"You sure that just wasn't an excuse to get on top of me again Tre?" said Billie.
"No, sorry Billina, just a revenge drop on not a sexual one, well anyways, I am off to go buy us some magic juice" said Tree.
"Hey, narrator/writer person I am not a tree, trees grow leaves, do I look like I have leaves?" yelled Tre.
***In the Car***
"I want you, you want me, lets team up and fuck in a tree, with a great big cock and a bong for me and you, hey she can join in too," Tre sang his revised version of the Barney theme song.
He rounded the corner and parked outside the Beer Store. Tre got out and locked the car and strolled inside. He admired all the different beer choices.
"Good old Canadian beer, can't ever have enough," he said to himself.
After making some of the hardest beer selections ever, Tre finally left the Beer Store and loaded everything into the trunk of his car. He got back into the front seat of the car and drove off back towards Stef's house.
"Ok, see when anything reminds Mike of friction in the pants his man downstairs wants some movement, and since he has no one around here to do that for him he has to do it himself," answered Tre.
"Aww dude your dad jacked off in your tub," said Lorie.
"Hey that's half dad," laughed Stef.
"And I witnessed it," Keirstin cringed.
"Guys, it not just jacking off like a normal person would do, Mike here makes a whole event out of it, basically a little play, oh and he likes to go hairless before he starts. Mike gets clean shaven down there," Billie explained.
"Wait a minute, how do you guys know this?" asked Lorie.
"Uhh!" Billie and Tre said at the same time.
Billie and Tre looked nervously at each other. Mike cocked his eyebrow. Rebecca and Lorie were almost laughing hysterically. Stef was speechless thinking of how she was having this conversation with her transvestite mother, father, and half father. And Keirstin was horrified at what she was learning about what she had walked in on.
"Ha, little horny perv stalkers" laughed Rebecca.
"Ok lets get off this topic before it gets any stranger," said Stef.
"I really don't think it is possible for this conversation to get any stranger," replied Keirstin.
"I like to suck cheese whiz out of a tube," said Tre.
"And I'm wrong," laughed Keirsten.
"You wish you had my talents to make things awkward," said Tre.
"Oh yah Tre I am so jealous of your amazing abilities," Keirstin said sarcastically.
***A Few Hours Later***
"I'm bored," Tre whined in a high pitched squeal.
"Hey, Tre you wanna do me a favour since you're bored?" Mike asked.
"No Mike, I'm not gonna suck your dick and play handball with your nuts again."
"No retard, I was going to say go out and buy some booze."
"Mike, how many times do I have to tell you, I will not be allowed to be liquored up and taken advantage by you, the 4 experiences were enough."
"Tre, just go out and buy some booze."
"Fine, but only cuz I'm bored out of my mind."
Billie got up to go to the washroom and Tre sneaked up and tackled him as hard as he could.
"Ha fucker, I told you I would get you back for throwing that drywall at my face" Tre said as he rolled off of Billie.
"You sure that just wasn't an excuse to get on top of me again Tre?" said Billie.
"No, sorry Billina, just a revenge drop on not a sexual one, well anyways, I am off to go buy us some magic juice" said Tree.
"Hey, narrator/writer person I am not a tree, trees grow leaves, do I look like I have leaves?" yelled Tre.
***In the Car***
"I want you, you want me, lets team up and fuck in a tree, with a great big cock and a bong for me and you, hey she can join in too," Tre sang his revised version of the Barney theme song.
He rounded the corner and parked outside the Beer Store. Tre got out and locked the car and strolled inside. He admired all the different beer choices.
"Good old Canadian beer, can't ever have enough," he said to himself.
After making some of the hardest beer selections ever, Tre finally left the Beer Store and loaded everything into the trunk of his car. He got back into the front seat of the car and drove off back towards Stef's house.
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