You Can't Do This To Me Mike!, chapter 9
Billie could not believe the situation he was in at the minute, handcuffed to his two best friends with the key missing, sitting at Jason's kitchen table, hearing how Tre had took Mike and himself to a dodgy ilegal chapel and got them all married to each other. Billie blinked, lost in his own thoughts, how could this happen? This wasn't fucking legal, he was married to Adi though? Shite, he thought, he was a bigamist a fucking bigamist. Mike looked at him helplessly across the table, Jason was trying to saw through the chains of the handcuffs,
Billie grinned at Mike, he really didn't mind being married to his sexy ass bassist afterall. Tre was giggling. He couldn't get the picture of him and Billie and a fuming angry Mike walking three blocks in their underwear handcuffed together with 'Just Married' sashes across their bare chests at 10 in the morning waddling to get to Jason's.
"Christ guys can't you just get drunk and have a normal night? You know get tattoos or marry strippers for Christ sake" Jason spat between his teeth, deliberatly avoiding Tre's eyes, " How the fuck can three guys get married to each other anyway"
The three of them turned to Tre for an answer, Tre smiled, "We got married in Mexico, everything is fucking legal there"
"Are we only married in Mexico then?" Mike asked exhasperated at Tre's answer
"Yeah i suppose, its only legal over there"
Billie realxed at this news,
"But doesn't that ,mean that everytime your in Mexico you guys are married?" Jason laughed swapping a saw and trying another
"Thats a big one Jason" Billie giggled hoping Mike would comment next,
"Yeah Jas a big one, Tre told you that before?" Mike giggled,
Jason scowled at his friend, "Shut up it wil never be mentioned again, i was drunk goddammit"
"Jas baby, you loved it" Tre winked,
"You practically raped you"
"You fucking sucked me off! How is that rape?"
"TRE SHUT UP OR IM NOT SAWING YOU FREE!" Jason yelled
Tre giggled ready to reply with a humorous comment about sawing him free but Billie kicked him under the table and he realised that he could skit Jason more once he wasn't attached to his bandmates.
Finally after a good hour of sawing the guys were free. They laugehd and sat down on the couch popping some beers,
"Tre why did you wanna marry us" Mike asked, the question had been bubbling away inhis mind for some time,
"I thought it would make me feel better since Claudia is not interested in me"
"Awww Tre"Billie cooed stroking his hair, Mike threw daggers at Tre, he wanted Billie's hand to brush through his hair,
"Damn Bill thats hot, there, no there, yeah yeah mmmm" Tre groaned taking the piss, Jason sensing what was next got up and excused him slef by going the bathroom. Mike watched fuming as Billie caressd Tre head, he knew he was joking but it angered him all the same.
"OH! KISS ME BJ!" Tre yelled laughing, he got up and retrieved more beers and Billie smacked the drummer's ass hard, Tre jumped, turned arounmd grinning and whispered, "Your fucking ass is mine baby!" he pounced on Billie and kissed him hard. Suddenly Mike shot up, he couldnt stop himself, he walked ove rto the drummer and pulled him off Billie Joe, he smacked him hard across the face and Tre fell to the ground, blood trickling from his jaw. Billie's chest heaved, he glanced at Tre then looked at Mike, slight fear in his eyes, but seeing Mike so agressive and protective made him excited, he looked up at the bassist with a lsut in his eyes, Mike grabbed him by the shoulders and flung his arms around his neck, kissing him hard. Tre got up slowly from the floor, he touched at the blood on his lip and glared at Mike, "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR YOUR FUCKING RETARDED TRAMP!"
Mike turned from falling into Billie's eyes,
"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?"
"YOU HERAD GYPSY SHIT, WHAT DID YOU HIT ME FOR YOU BULLBALL?"
Billie giggled at gypsy shit and bull ball, Tre didn't realsie but he had a gift for making up the most hilarious comebacks ever.
Jason burst through the door, "what is going on?"
Billie grinned, they were fighting, fighting over him, he was getting excited bythe vein pounding in Mike's temple,
"TRE YOUR A FUCKING MORON"
"YOUR A GOBSHITE MIKE, A FUCKING GOBSHITE, HE FUCKING HIT ME JAS, HE HIT ME!"
Care to explain?" Jason asked.
Billie grinned at Mike, he really didn't mind being married to his sexy ass bassist afterall. Tre was giggling. He couldn't get the picture of him and Billie and a fuming angry Mike walking three blocks in their underwear handcuffed together with 'Just Married' sashes across their bare chests at 10 in the morning waddling to get to Jason's.
"Christ guys can't you just get drunk and have a normal night? You know get tattoos or marry strippers for Christ sake" Jason spat between his teeth, deliberatly avoiding Tre's eyes, " How the fuck can three guys get married to each other anyway"
The three of them turned to Tre for an answer, Tre smiled, "We got married in Mexico, everything is fucking legal there"
"Are we only married in Mexico then?" Mike asked exhasperated at Tre's answer
"Yeah i suppose, its only legal over there"
Billie realxed at this news,
"But doesn't that ,mean that everytime your in Mexico you guys are married?" Jason laughed swapping a saw and trying another
"Thats a big one Jason" Billie giggled hoping Mike would comment next,
"Yeah Jas a big one, Tre told you that before?" Mike giggled,
Jason scowled at his friend, "Shut up it wil never be mentioned again, i was drunk goddammit"
"Jas baby, you loved it" Tre winked,
"You practically raped you"
"You fucking sucked me off! How is that rape?"
"TRE SHUT UP OR IM NOT SAWING YOU FREE!" Jason yelled
Tre giggled ready to reply with a humorous comment about sawing him free but Billie kicked him under the table and he realised that he could skit Jason more once he wasn't attached to his bandmates.
Finally after a good hour of sawing the guys were free. They laugehd and sat down on the couch popping some beers,
"Tre why did you wanna marry us" Mike asked, the question had been bubbling away inhis mind for some time,
"I thought it would make me feel better since Claudia is not interested in me"
"Awww Tre"Billie cooed stroking his hair, Mike threw daggers at Tre, he wanted Billie's hand to brush through his hair,
"Damn Bill thats hot, there, no there, yeah yeah mmmm" Tre groaned taking the piss, Jason sensing what was next got up and excused him slef by going the bathroom. Mike watched fuming as Billie caressd Tre head, he knew he was joking but it angered him all the same.
"OH! KISS ME BJ!" Tre yelled laughing, he got up and retrieved more beers and Billie smacked the drummer's ass hard, Tre jumped, turned arounmd grinning and whispered, "Your fucking ass is mine baby!" he pounced on Billie and kissed him hard. Suddenly Mike shot up, he couldnt stop himself, he walked ove rto the drummer and pulled him off Billie Joe, he smacked him hard across the face and Tre fell to the ground, blood trickling from his jaw. Billie's chest heaved, he glanced at Tre then looked at Mike, slight fear in his eyes, but seeing Mike so agressive and protective made him excited, he looked up at the bassist with a lsut in his eyes, Mike grabbed him by the shoulders and flung his arms around his neck, kissing him hard. Tre got up slowly from the floor, he touched at the blood on his lip and glared at Mike, "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR YOUR FUCKING RETARDED TRAMP!"
Mike turned from falling into Billie's eyes,
"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?"
"YOU HERAD GYPSY SHIT, WHAT DID YOU HIT ME FOR YOU BULLBALL?"
Billie giggled at gypsy shit and bull ball, Tre didn't realsie but he had a gift for making up the most hilarious comebacks ever.
Jason burst through the door, "what is going on?"
Billie grinned, they were fighting, fighting over him, he was getting excited bythe vein pounding in Mike's temple,
"TRE YOUR A FUCKING MORON"
"YOUR A GOBSHITE MIKE, A FUCKING GOBSHITE, HE FUCKING HIT ME JAS, HE HIT ME!"
Care to explain?" Jason asked.
