Duct Tape Is Good, chapter 1

So I'm sitting here, reading the stories on this site for the first time because this is only my second day here. Well, It's monday, and mondays are bad. And well I'm reading and I'm like "why aren't any of the stories related to Green Day???" Cuz I want to read stories about my husband Billie Joe. stick to the subject people!!! Anyways. I'm gonna tell ya how me and Billie Joe here got married. See, I was walking along the street minding my business while trying to get this thing of wax out of my ear, when some guy goes "Get a room!" I didn't think he was talking to me, cuz it didn't make sense.... Then i feel a tap on my shoulder. I turn around. "OMG!! It's Billie Joe!!" I screamed, with my finger still wedged in my ear. He looked down at me with those oh so seductive eyes and said, "Need help?" "yah, actually, I got some crap stuck in my ear and I need to get it out." He handed me a q tip. I didn't know what to do with it so with an exasperated look he started cleaning my ear with it. Oooo man. It was great. So when he's done i just stare at him, and suddenly i started making out with him. Man. He is a damn good kisser. Twenty minutes later.....
Me and billie joe climb out from the bushes and then the old lady starts cussing at us for ruining her plants and then we start cussing back at her and we get in this huge cussing war until the police come. Billie Joe bit one of the officers and the other one pulled out duct tape and taped our mouths shut. Well we still keep fighting so they duct tape me and Billie together and I didn't mind at all, it was pretty nice. So, a month later, we're still here, duct taped together and don't ask how I got on here. Well, we aren't legally married but to hell with that. We're close enough. Haha, he still hasn't figured out that i got a knife here to cut ourselves out.. Mwahaha. Well, its bent up since I used it to kill a turkey....