Hanging on the Brink of Self Destruction, chapter 1
Billie Joe couldn't believe what he had just done. Adrienne's words still rang in his ears and his still tasted sour in his mouth. Green Day had just finished the 'American Idiot Tour 2005' which was the best tour they had ever played but Billie Joe wasn't planning to come home to this.
Adie stared at him, tears in her eyes, looking angry and upset at the same time. There was such a long silence; the kind that is dreaded by anyone, any couple.
"Well, you know what Billie Joe Armstrong, I don't need you and I don't need my kids running to you to be the kind parent while I'm the sad old mother fucker whose telling them off while you're touring or in the studio or anything. Yeah, I have loved you, fuck, I still fucking love you, so fucking much" she cried, wiping her eyes, smudging her makeup.
"Look, Adie, I didn't mean that. I love you too!" Billie Joe interrupted.
"Then what DID you mean?" she screamed back at him. Again there was a long silence.
"I... I don't know, but this can get better baby" Billie Joe said quickly, trying to stop Adrienne from walking out on him.
"Well, if you don't know, then go for a walk and think about it; think about me leaving and about you and the kids and the fabulous fucking tour and your whole fucking fabulous life" Adie broke down, sticking Billie's coat in his hands. She cried into her hand, shaking his coat in his face.
"Honey" Billie said, starting to hug her but Adrienne pushed him off her and Billie Joe took his coat in defeat.
"Bill, I love you... and if you still love me, I want you to think about this" she said as Billie Joe left, closing the door behind him.
Why the fuck did I just do that? Billie thought, shoving his hands in his pockets. Did he really just go off Adie altogether?
*** Flash Back***
God, another great concert! Billie Joe, Mike and Tre walked tired, sweaty but happy to the VIP room. There wouldn't be anyone there because they had had a mix up with the tickets. Mike began poured some wine into glasses to celebrate another successful show while Tre sat next to Billie Joe on the sofa.
"Did you bitches see that girl who came up for drums? I think I'm in love" Tre cried, falling back on the sofa.
"She was quite pretty... Maybe you should go and look for her" Mike suggested, passing his band a glass full of the red stuff.
Billie Joe didn't answer; he was in another world... He had seen someone in the crowd too and it was like going back to Minnesota and seeing Adrienne for the first time. She was so pretty; her hair was blonde and her eyes were like... so fucking indescribable. But he wasn't gonna tell the boys that; what they feel like around Adie?
"Yeah Tre, you should, before she goes to by fucking hotdogs" Billie agreed, getting his guitar onto his lap and strumming a tune as Tre got up to find his woman.
"Hey, Bill, that a new song?" Mike asked, sitting down next to Billie Joe who was staring at the floor, strangely quiet. What if he never saw her again? "Billie Joe?" Mike asked again, breaking the thoughts and feelings rushing through Billie Joe's mind.
"Oh, no, I'm just thinking about writing one" Billie Joe answered, telling a half truth. He was thinking about one and was going to but the most he was thinking about was that girl.
"Thought I'd fucking lost you for a minute" Mike laughed, gulping his drink down. "You did shitting good tonight"
"Cheers Mike but, y'know, couldn't have done it without you and Tre"
"Billie, something is on your mind" Mike said.
"Huh? No there's not"
"Go and do whatever you were gonna do" Mike told Billie Joe. He then realised that he could at least see this girl on last time.
"Thank you so fucking much Mike even though you might regret what I'm gonna do, hell I might even regret it" Billie Joe said, throwing his guitar on the sofa next to Mike who picked it up and started to finger pick.
Billie Joe peeked round the curtain of the stage to see if she was still there. Tre was on the stage, looking for the drummer he had picked out. But the girl was no longer in the front row...
"SHITTY... AGHHHHH!" Billie yelled. He was gonna run onto that stage and fuck all the publicity.
Tre had found his girl and she was pulled out by the security and onto the stage, everyone still screaming. Billie Joe ran out and looked over and over but she wasn't there; just a mob of screaming people. Most people at the back were leaving and now the people at the front were starting to chant "Mike, Mike, Mike"
Billie Joe's heart was breaking over this girl. This girl who had won him over in a single night, he needed her so bad!
*** End of Flash Back ***
Billie Joe had stopped walking and all he could think about was how much he had fucked up. Adrienne was gonna leave him; this couldn't happen! He was sitting on a bench, his head in his hands, thinking back to that girl and how much he still loved her. The girl called Aimee, but Adrienne was meant to be his ultimate love; why was he suddenly feeling this way?
He looked up; no one was around. I could just jump off that fucking bridge right now and it would all be over... NO, what about Green Day? What about the kids? He thought. The only decision that made sense enough to do was call someone. Billie Joe got out his mobile and punched in Mike's number...
Adie stared at him, tears in her eyes, looking angry and upset at the same time. There was such a long silence; the kind that is dreaded by anyone, any couple.
"Well, you know what Billie Joe Armstrong, I don't need you and I don't need my kids running to you to be the kind parent while I'm the sad old mother fucker whose telling them off while you're touring or in the studio or anything. Yeah, I have loved you, fuck, I still fucking love you, so fucking much" she cried, wiping her eyes, smudging her makeup.
"Look, Adie, I didn't mean that. I love you too!" Billie Joe interrupted.
"Then what DID you mean?" she screamed back at him. Again there was a long silence.
"I... I don't know, but this can get better baby" Billie Joe said quickly, trying to stop Adrienne from walking out on him.
"Well, if you don't know, then go for a walk and think about it; think about me leaving and about you and the kids and the fabulous fucking tour and your whole fucking fabulous life" Adie broke down, sticking Billie's coat in his hands. She cried into her hand, shaking his coat in his face.
"Honey" Billie said, starting to hug her but Adrienne pushed him off her and Billie Joe took his coat in defeat.
"Bill, I love you... and if you still love me, I want you to think about this" she said as Billie Joe left, closing the door behind him.
Why the fuck did I just do that? Billie thought, shoving his hands in his pockets. Did he really just go off Adie altogether?
*** Flash Back***
God, another great concert! Billie Joe, Mike and Tre walked tired, sweaty but happy to the VIP room. There wouldn't be anyone there because they had had a mix up with the tickets. Mike began poured some wine into glasses to celebrate another successful show while Tre sat next to Billie Joe on the sofa.
"Did you bitches see that girl who came up for drums? I think I'm in love" Tre cried, falling back on the sofa.
"She was quite pretty... Maybe you should go and look for her" Mike suggested, passing his band a glass full of the red stuff.
Billie Joe didn't answer; he was in another world... He had seen someone in the crowd too and it was like going back to Minnesota and seeing Adrienne for the first time. She was so pretty; her hair was blonde and her eyes were like... so fucking indescribable. But he wasn't gonna tell the boys that; what they feel like around Adie?
"Yeah Tre, you should, before she goes to by fucking hotdogs" Billie agreed, getting his guitar onto his lap and strumming a tune as Tre got up to find his woman.
"Hey, Bill, that a new song?" Mike asked, sitting down next to Billie Joe who was staring at the floor, strangely quiet. What if he never saw her again? "Billie Joe?" Mike asked again, breaking the thoughts and feelings rushing through Billie Joe's mind.
"Oh, no, I'm just thinking about writing one" Billie Joe answered, telling a half truth. He was thinking about one and was going to but the most he was thinking about was that girl.
"Thought I'd fucking lost you for a minute" Mike laughed, gulping his drink down. "You did shitting good tonight"
"Cheers Mike but, y'know, couldn't have done it without you and Tre"
"Billie, something is on your mind" Mike said.
"Huh? No there's not"
"Go and do whatever you were gonna do" Mike told Billie Joe. He then realised that he could at least see this girl on last time.
"Thank you so fucking much Mike even though you might regret what I'm gonna do, hell I might even regret it" Billie Joe said, throwing his guitar on the sofa next to Mike who picked it up and started to finger pick.
Billie Joe peeked round the curtain of the stage to see if she was still there. Tre was on the stage, looking for the drummer he had picked out. But the girl was no longer in the front row...
"SHITTY... AGHHHHH!" Billie yelled. He was gonna run onto that stage and fuck all the publicity.
Tre had found his girl and she was pulled out by the security and onto the stage, everyone still screaming. Billie Joe ran out and looked over and over but she wasn't there; just a mob of screaming people. Most people at the back were leaving and now the people at the front were starting to chant "Mike, Mike, Mike"
Billie Joe's heart was breaking over this girl. This girl who had won him over in a single night, he needed her so bad!
*** End of Flash Back ***
Billie Joe had stopped walking and all he could think about was how much he had fucked up. Adrienne was gonna leave him; this couldn't happen! He was sitting on a bench, his head in his hands, thinking back to that girl and how much he still loved her. The girl called Aimee, but Adrienne was meant to be his ultimate love; why was he suddenly feeling this way?
He looked up; no one was around. I could just jump off that fucking bridge right now and it would all be over... NO, what about Green Day? What about the kids? He thought. The only decision that made sense enough to do was call someone. Billie Joe got out his mobile and punched in Mike's number...
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