Love, Sex and Booze (Edited), chapter 3
"Okay question number one." Emily started reading off the card to Billie and Melanie who sat opposite her on the couch. "A small boy always dreamed of parachuting out of a plane. One day he decided to jump out of a plane, but he didn't have a parachute attached to him and he fell to the ground below. Amazingly he was not hurt in any way. How is that possible?"
"He was supermans son?" Billie tried.
"No..."
"Ooh... There was a trampoline below and he just bounced off!" Melanie suggested.
"Come on guys this is so fucking easy we are not losing to them again!" Emily let out frustratedly pointing at Mike Sophie and Tre who sat on the floor giggling.
"Well the boy's a stupid fucking idiot anyway why would you jump the fuck out of a plane for christ sake?!" Billie said shaking his head. Sophie laughed at him as Emily looked at him dissaprovingly.
"The answer IS the plane was not flying it was on the ground. The boy fell only about 4 feet."
"OH! God I knew that!" Billie said loudly.
"Oh yeah ofcourse." Melanie laughed.
Emily gave Tre a card. "Come on next question."
"Okay guys... " Tre said picking up the card. "It twists and turns, at times goes straight it's sometimes used for a parade And yet what may sound strange to state It never moves from where it's laid."
"A dick?" Mike frowned. They all laughed as Tre raised his eyebrows at him.
"Well I don't know about you Mike but my cock definitely isin't used for a fucking parade."
"And does your dick never move from where it's laid?" Sophie asked.
"Ofcourse it does... Billie'sdoesn't though...!"
"Fuck you!" Billie said throwing an empty beer can at Mike as he laughed and dodged it.
"It's a road." Sophie said to Tre.
"YES! Oh yeah one point to us! You guys suck!" Tre said pointing at Emily, Melanie and Billie.
"Hey that's not fair she's read those cards like ten million times!" Emily argued giving Sophie evils.
"Emily why the fuck would I waste my time reading a couple of brainbender cards?"
" 'Cause you've got nothing better to do?" Melanie said rasising her eyebrow looking from Sophie to Mike.
"Or maybe it's because your to pussy to do anything better?" Emily said also looking from Sophie to Mike. The room went silent as Sophie gave Emily and Melanie a sharp look as her cheeks went bright red.
"Bit like you too huh Mike?" Tre said nudging Mike with his foot.
"Don't know what your talking about." Mike mumbled.
"Anyway enough of this shit game let's talk about something else... Sophie hows your love life?" Emily suddenly said.
Tre tried with all his might not to crack up looking at Sophie from behind Mike. Sophie's jaw dropped slightly at Emilys question but she shrugged trying not to show her face was going redder by the second.
"Fine..." she shrugged looking at the floor.
"How about you Mike how's yours?" Billie asked trying not to laugh at Tre who had tears in his eyes from trying not to laugh.
"Hey you know what Billie when was the last time you had sex, oh no wait, didn't your cock just recently fall off because it wasn't getting any action?"
Tre finally burst. "I think he's been getting more action than you have dude!"
Sophie finally stood up. "I'm gonna go get a drink." She said quickly walking off.
Mike looked at Billie and Tre who were both now laughing so hard they could hardly breath. "You guys are so fucking dead." Mike sneered at them getting up onto his feet.
"That... Was... So... Funny..." Tre tried to say between laughs.
"I know!... Mike'sface!"
After a couple of minutes Billie picked up his bottle of beer and stood up. "I'm gonna go for a walk. Anyone wanna come?"
"Yeah I'll come." Melanie said getting up.
Tre stretched and pulled himself up off the floor, and sat down next to Emily. "See you two dudes later..."
***
The sun was beginning to set as Billie and Melanie started making their way back to the house, not realising that they had been walking for more than two hours.
" Come on Billie you're the lead singer of the band, you should know what it feels like" Melanie said nudging him.
"Know what.. What feels like?" Billie replied raising an eyebrow at her.
"Being... You know the one that everyone loves" She said.
Billie looked at her with his eyebrow still raised.
"People love me...? Wow I feel so special!"
"Oh don't pull that shit with me, you know people love you."
"Name me one person that does!" Billie said stopping to look at her.
"Erm... " Melanie stuttered. "I'm sure Tre does." She smiled.
Billie let out a light hearted laugh. "Oh well that really has made my day!"
Billie looked at her for a long while not quite knowing what to say.
"Erm.. Mel..."
"What?"
"Errrrrr... Never... Nevermind." Billie shrugged and started walking again.
"Billie! What? What were you gonna say to me?" Melanie said quickly catching up with him.
"Nothing don't worry about it... It doesn't matter..." Melanie sighed looking at him. "It's just...!" Billie turned around to face her. "I... It's just... Ah forget it there's no point..."
"You know I knew it!" Melanie let out frustratedly. "You always do that Billie always!"
"What? What do I do?!"
"That! You... Your about to say something and you don't."
Billie bit his bottom lip for a second then turned around again and began walking. Melanie quickly catched up with him. "You wanna know why I went out with Warren Billie?" Billie stopped again. There was a long pause as they just stared at eachother. "Because YOU never asked first!" Melanie swallowed hard wanting to bury herself in the ground with what she had just said.
She turned around but Billie grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her towards him. Before she knew it Billie'slips had covered hers. She pulled away looking at him and then looked at the floor.
"Oh my god... Mel I'm so sorry... "
She smiled and put her hand on the side of his face pulling him towards her as their lips met again this time kissing him with more passion. Her other arm wrapped around his neck as the last beam of light from the sun hit them as they continued kissing deeply.
***
" That's a wrap guys!"
[i]Oh thank fuck for that[i] Melanie sighed to herself. She stood up, walked over to the water cooler and started to pour herself a drink.
"Oh look what the cat dragged in!" Melanie looked up recognising the high pitched screechy voice. She turned round gritting her teeth to see a tall, blonde woman, with the words FAKE and PLASTIC written all over her body. Melanie forced a smile onto her face.
"Hi... Zoe " she said.
"Oh don't give me that nicey nice shit we all know you fucking hate me so don't hi me!"
Melanie untightened her forced smile, raising her eyebrows at zoe.
"Well if you put it that way... "
"Yeah so anyway like I heard that Warren was like whats the word... GAY! Aren't you you like with him.. And isn't he like Sophie's brother? Like whats that all about?"
"Zoe... If I didn't have to work with a phoney, plastic Barbie bimbo like you every other fucking day you would be dead by now.. You know why?... Because I'd have killed you.. Actually no I'd have hired a hitman coz I havent got the time to waste on a tramp like you. You are the weakest link GOODBYE!"
And with that Melanie walked off with a smug look on her face. Zoe grabbed onto Melanie's wrist pulling her back.
"You watch your mouth bitch!" she hissed. "I know where it's been."
"Whatever Zoe go back to your corner."
"I saw you downtown last night. I don't think you're BOYFRIEND will be very happy if he knew you had your tongue down Billie Joe's throat now would he?"
"You fucking... I don't know what your talking about..." Melanie said not realising the panic that had risen in her voice but Zoe heard loud and clear. Zoe smiled broadly.
Melanie yanked her wrist out of Zoe's grip turning around.
"Remember what I said Mel!... Watch your mouth!"
Zoe walked off with a smarmy look on her face. Melanie was thinking about what Zoe had said when all of a sudden she felt two strong hands take grasp of her waist. Melanie gasped turning to see Warren standing infront of her.
"Warren! You scared the living shit out of me!"
"Sorry babe just thought I'd surprise you..."
"Listen Warren we need to talk..." Melanie started.
"Wait Mel... " Warren interuppted. "Listen I'm sorry 'bout yesterday I was a complete jackass, I was bein' a jerk... Let me make it up to you yeah?"
Melanie noticed Zoe behind Warren giving her an evil look.
"Mel you listening to me?"
"Yeah yeah... Warren..." Melanie paused swallowing hard. "I'm sorry."
"Why are you sorry? Look babe... We had an argument yeah? We've sorted it out yeah?" Melanie looked at Warren biting her bottom lip.
"Come on I'm the one who's sorry... Forgive me?"
"'Course I do." Warren smiled kissing her on the lips. Melanie saw Zoe raise her eyebrows at them still watching them closely. "Warren let's get out of here."
"He was supermans son?" Billie tried.
"No..."
"Ooh... There was a trampoline below and he just bounced off!" Melanie suggested.
"Come on guys this is so fucking easy we are not losing to them again!" Emily let out frustratedly pointing at Mike Sophie and Tre who sat on the floor giggling.
"Well the boy's a stupid fucking idiot anyway why would you jump the fuck out of a plane for christ sake?!" Billie said shaking his head. Sophie laughed at him as Emily looked at him dissaprovingly.
"The answer IS the plane was not flying it was on the ground. The boy fell only about 4 feet."
"OH! God I knew that!" Billie said loudly.
"Oh yeah ofcourse." Melanie laughed.
Emily gave Tre a card. "Come on next question."
"Okay guys... " Tre said picking up the card. "It twists and turns, at times goes straight it's sometimes used for a parade And yet what may sound strange to state It never moves from where it's laid."
"A dick?" Mike frowned. They all laughed as Tre raised his eyebrows at him.
"Well I don't know about you Mike but my cock definitely isin't used for a fucking parade."
"And does your dick never move from where it's laid?" Sophie asked.
"Ofcourse it does... Billie'sdoesn't though...!"
"Fuck you!" Billie said throwing an empty beer can at Mike as he laughed and dodged it.
"It's a road." Sophie said to Tre.
"YES! Oh yeah one point to us! You guys suck!" Tre said pointing at Emily, Melanie and Billie.
"Hey that's not fair she's read those cards like ten million times!" Emily argued giving Sophie evils.
"Emily why the fuck would I waste my time reading a couple of brainbender cards?"
" 'Cause you've got nothing better to do?" Melanie said rasising her eyebrow looking from Sophie to Mike.
"Or maybe it's because your to pussy to do anything better?" Emily said also looking from Sophie to Mike. The room went silent as Sophie gave Emily and Melanie a sharp look as her cheeks went bright red.
"Bit like you too huh Mike?" Tre said nudging Mike with his foot.
"Don't know what your talking about." Mike mumbled.
"Anyway enough of this shit game let's talk about something else... Sophie hows your love life?" Emily suddenly said.
Tre tried with all his might not to crack up looking at Sophie from behind Mike. Sophie's jaw dropped slightly at Emilys question but she shrugged trying not to show her face was going redder by the second.
"Fine..." she shrugged looking at the floor.
"How about you Mike how's yours?" Billie asked trying not to laugh at Tre who had tears in his eyes from trying not to laugh.
"Hey you know what Billie when was the last time you had sex, oh no wait, didn't your cock just recently fall off because it wasn't getting any action?"
Tre finally burst. "I think he's been getting more action than you have dude!"
Sophie finally stood up. "I'm gonna go get a drink." She said quickly walking off.
Mike looked at Billie and Tre who were both now laughing so hard they could hardly breath. "You guys are so fucking dead." Mike sneered at them getting up onto his feet.
"That... Was... So... Funny..." Tre tried to say between laughs.
"I know!... Mike'sface!"
After a couple of minutes Billie picked up his bottle of beer and stood up. "I'm gonna go for a walk. Anyone wanna come?"
"Yeah I'll come." Melanie said getting up.
Tre stretched and pulled himself up off the floor, and sat down next to Emily. "See you two dudes later..."
***
The sun was beginning to set as Billie and Melanie started making their way back to the house, not realising that they had been walking for more than two hours.
" Come on Billie you're the lead singer of the band, you should know what it feels like" Melanie said nudging him.
"Know what.. What feels like?" Billie replied raising an eyebrow at her.
"Being... You know the one that everyone loves" She said.
Billie looked at her with his eyebrow still raised.
"People love me...? Wow I feel so special!"
"Oh don't pull that shit with me, you know people love you."
"Name me one person that does!" Billie said stopping to look at her.
"Erm... " Melanie stuttered. "I'm sure Tre does." She smiled.
Billie let out a light hearted laugh. "Oh well that really has made my day!"
Billie looked at her for a long while not quite knowing what to say.
"Erm.. Mel..."
"What?"
"Errrrrr... Never... Nevermind." Billie shrugged and started walking again.
"Billie! What? What were you gonna say to me?" Melanie said quickly catching up with him.
"Nothing don't worry about it... It doesn't matter..." Melanie sighed looking at him. "It's just...!" Billie turned around to face her. "I... It's just... Ah forget it there's no point..."
"You know I knew it!" Melanie let out frustratedly. "You always do that Billie always!"
"What? What do I do?!"
"That! You... Your about to say something and you don't."
Billie bit his bottom lip for a second then turned around again and began walking. Melanie quickly catched up with him. "You wanna know why I went out with Warren Billie?" Billie stopped again. There was a long pause as they just stared at eachother. "Because YOU never asked first!" Melanie swallowed hard wanting to bury herself in the ground with what she had just said.
She turned around but Billie grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her towards him. Before she knew it Billie'slips had covered hers. She pulled away looking at him and then looked at the floor.
"Oh my god... Mel I'm so sorry... "
She smiled and put her hand on the side of his face pulling him towards her as their lips met again this time kissing him with more passion. Her other arm wrapped around his neck as the last beam of light from the sun hit them as they continued kissing deeply.
***
" That's a wrap guys!"
[i]Oh thank fuck for that[i] Melanie sighed to herself. She stood up, walked over to the water cooler and started to pour herself a drink.
"Oh look what the cat dragged in!" Melanie looked up recognising the high pitched screechy voice. She turned round gritting her teeth to see a tall, blonde woman, with the words FAKE and PLASTIC written all over her body. Melanie forced a smile onto her face.
"Hi... Zoe " she said.
"Oh don't give me that nicey nice shit we all know you fucking hate me so don't hi me!"
Melanie untightened her forced smile, raising her eyebrows at zoe.
"Well if you put it that way... "
"Yeah so anyway like I heard that Warren was like whats the word... GAY! Aren't you you like with him.. And isn't he like Sophie's brother? Like whats that all about?"
"Zoe... If I didn't have to work with a phoney, plastic Barbie bimbo like you every other fucking day you would be dead by now.. You know why?... Because I'd have killed you.. Actually no I'd have hired a hitman coz I havent got the time to waste on a tramp like you. You are the weakest link GOODBYE!"
And with that Melanie walked off with a smug look on her face. Zoe grabbed onto Melanie's wrist pulling her back.
"You watch your mouth bitch!" she hissed. "I know where it's been."
"Whatever Zoe go back to your corner."
"I saw you downtown last night. I don't think you're BOYFRIEND will be very happy if he knew you had your tongue down Billie Joe's throat now would he?"
"You fucking... I don't know what your talking about..." Melanie said not realising the panic that had risen in her voice but Zoe heard loud and clear. Zoe smiled broadly.
Melanie yanked her wrist out of Zoe's grip turning around.
"Remember what I said Mel!... Watch your mouth!"
Zoe walked off with a smarmy look on her face. Melanie was thinking about what Zoe had said when all of a sudden she felt two strong hands take grasp of her waist. Melanie gasped turning to see Warren standing infront of her.
"Warren! You scared the living shit out of me!"
"Sorry babe just thought I'd surprise you..."
"Listen Warren we need to talk..." Melanie started.
"Wait Mel... " Warren interuppted. "Listen I'm sorry 'bout yesterday I was a complete jackass, I was bein' a jerk... Let me make it up to you yeah?"
Melanie noticed Zoe behind Warren giving her an evil look.
"Mel you listening to me?"
"Yeah yeah... Warren..." Melanie paused swallowing hard. "I'm sorry."
"Why are you sorry? Look babe... We had an argument yeah? We've sorted it out yeah?" Melanie looked at Warren biting her bottom lip.
"Come on I'm the one who's sorry... Forgive me?"
"'Course I do." Warren smiled kissing her on the lips. Melanie saw Zoe raise her eyebrows at them still watching them closely. "Warren let's get out of here."
