All over again and again and again, chapter 1
"Sarah, get your ass up. You don't want to be late on your first day at your new school."
I didn't want to wake up. I didn't want to meet anybody. I just wanted to be back at my old house. It was difficult enough to make friends there. Now I have to make friends all over again.
"I'm awake Mom. No need to yell at me." My mom always yells at me, because she thinks everything is my fault. I don't understand. Ever since my dad left she's never's been the same. Nothing's been the same.
I got up and out of bed and got dressed. I decided I should wear a plain black shirt with pink fishnets under it and a pink and black skirt. Then I put on my black boots with a three inch heels. I like to wear them, because they make me look taller than I am. I'm a little on the short side. I did have red hair but I dyed it purple. Purple is more interesting than red, to me anyway. I put on a lot of eyeliner, as I always do. My mom doesn't like it, but it's not like I give shit about that. I walked down the steps of the stairs slightly dragging my feet, because I wanted to go as slow as I could go.
When I finally reached the last step I went to the closet to get out my coat. Then my mom handed me my backpack.
"Sarah, why do you wear so much eyeliner? You're such a pretty girl." My mom tells me that every morning. Now it's apart of my morning routine.
"Because I don't want to be a pretty girl. I thought you would have noticed that by now," I told my mom.
"Well, the bus should be here soon. You better go to the bus stop. And here's a granola bar. You can eat that for breakfast." Why does my mom always have to be so happy all of the time. I know she's faking it. She always pretends to be happy when she's around other people. When she's with me, that's a totally different story.
I was on my way to the bus stop. It's about 1 block away from where I live. I was trying not to step on the cracks as I was walking down the sidewalk. Eventually I got to the bus stop. No one was there. It was just me standing there all by myself. Maybe I wasn't at the right place. At least if I was in the wrong place I would have an excuse for not going to school today. But before I could start walking away from the bus stop, the bus came. Damn, now I have to go to school. Shit Shit Shit. I should've just stayed home.
The bus doors opened and sent a little breeze straight into my face. I walked up the steps. Everyone was looking at me. There were a lot of kids, retarded ones that is. I decided I would sit with this guy. He was listening to music so I wouldn't have to talk to him. I went up to the seat and stood there for a couple of seconds until he scooted over for me to sit down. I had nothing else to do so I just stared at him. He noticed after awhile and started to stare at me too.
"Why are you staring at me?" asked the kid.
"Um... no reason," I said quietly. He took off his headphones. Then this girl got on the bus.
"Hi Billie," is all she said.
"Hey," he, or should I say, Billie replied back to her.
"Who's that?" I asked Billie.
"Oh that's Adrienne," Billie said.
"She seems nice," I said back to him.
"Yeah... she's really nice," Billie said turnig his head toward the window. I couldn't help but think he's really cute. I wouldn't call it a crush though. Well, not yet.
I didn't want to wake up. I didn't want to meet anybody. I just wanted to be back at my old house. It was difficult enough to make friends there. Now I have to make friends all over again.
"I'm awake Mom. No need to yell at me." My mom always yells at me, because she thinks everything is my fault. I don't understand. Ever since my dad left she's never's been the same. Nothing's been the same.
I got up and out of bed and got dressed. I decided I should wear a plain black shirt with pink fishnets under it and a pink and black skirt. Then I put on my black boots with a three inch heels. I like to wear them, because they make me look taller than I am. I'm a little on the short side. I did have red hair but I dyed it purple. Purple is more interesting than red, to me anyway. I put on a lot of eyeliner, as I always do. My mom doesn't like it, but it's not like I give shit about that. I walked down the steps of the stairs slightly dragging my feet, because I wanted to go as slow as I could go.
When I finally reached the last step I went to the closet to get out my coat. Then my mom handed me my backpack.
"Sarah, why do you wear so much eyeliner? You're such a pretty girl." My mom tells me that every morning. Now it's apart of my morning routine.
"Because I don't want to be a pretty girl. I thought you would have noticed that by now," I told my mom.
"Well, the bus should be here soon. You better go to the bus stop. And here's a granola bar. You can eat that for breakfast." Why does my mom always have to be so happy all of the time. I know she's faking it. She always pretends to be happy when she's around other people. When she's with me, that's a totally different story.
I was on my way to the bus stop. It's about 1 block away from where I live. I was trying not to step on the cracks as I was walking down the sidewalk. Eventually I got to the bus stop. No one was there. It was just me standing there all by myself. Maybe I wasn't at the right place. At least if I was in the wrong place I would have an excuse for not going to school today. But before I could start walking away from the bus stop, the bus came. Damn, now I have to go to school. Shit Shit Shit. I should've just stayed home.
The bus doors opened and sent a little breeze straight into my face. I walked up the steps. Everyone was looking at me. There were a lot of kids, retarded ones that is. I decided I would sit with this guy. He was listening to music so I wouldn't have to talk to him. I went up to the seat and stood there for a couple of seconds until he scooted over for me to sit down. I had nothing else to do so I just stared at him. He noticed after awhile and started to stare at me too.
"Why are you staring at me?" asked the kid.
"Um... no reason," I said quietly. He took off his headphones. Then this girl got on the bus.
"Hi Billie," is all she said.
"Hey," he, or should I say, Billie replied back to her.
"Who's that?" I asked Billie.
"Oh that's Adrienne," Billie said.
"She seems nice," I said back to him.
"Yeah... she's really nice," Billie said turnig his head toward the window. I couldn't help but think he's really cute. I wouldn't call it a crush though. Well, not yet.
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